Teen Poetry #4 |
As violence equates violence... |
Deranger Member
since 2000-05-10
Posts 498Somewhere, between here and there |
This is a real life occurence, modified under the compartments of my artistic license...It was set in motion by Poet on Acid's post here and here As violence equates violence, I’ll see to a complete voidance- Of your life! I dare anyone to try and deny me this! Such a pretty face—hurt looks so out of place Sacrilege, to scar this angel’s heart; break hers, and I’ll break you Pretty pink face, now all black and blue, Yeah, he’s hittin’ her--he must love her too- It’s only ‘cause he loves her too, I don’t really love her—My God, what has made me, become so evil? Principle save me, I can still kill him on that; attach her pain to mine It refocused to blind, my reason; what good is thought, in this season Of humanity’s – inanity, fraternity of the Devil and me- And we bond so naturally; the knife feels so right… In his last gurglings, he promises never to hit her again- My new friend, the Devil, agrees – as we, drink his blood And feast on his blackened soul, he fills this hole – in mine As I wake, all smeared in blood—the Devil abandoned me I hear the sirens; the knights of justice, are riding for me I contemplate this irony, as their bullets tear through me; Have they gotten the villain this time? Is society just this blind? Is humanity, some demon’s fantasy we’ve brought to life? --------------- In hoping my HTML code works the first time... Edit: DOH! Guess not. Edit: I hate HTML! Spreading insanity, one post at a time My skull has glowing green eyes! [This message has been edited by Deranger (edited 05-26-2001).] |
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© Copyright 2001 Alexander Crino - All Rights Reserved | |||
Dopey Dope
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico |
Wow you write so raw. I really like this one and it reaks of real life occurences. I enjoyed this one. I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust. |
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AngelShell Member
since 2000-03-01
Posts 446not heaven nor hell so... |
It's good, you know it is, and you know what I want to say, and you know it's already been said so many times, and will continue to be said. ~First they tell you, you can’t sleep alone in a strange place, then they tell you, you can’t sleep with somebody else~ |
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anonymous albert ?
since 2001-03-23
Posts 2979 |
written very well...i enjoyed this poem a lot...thanks for sharing it...quite powerful...and hope to see more... ...? ahhhhh....i'm addicted to passions in poetry!!!!! |
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princess^sarah Member
since 2001-01-12
Posts 131melbourne |
wow that was really cool i hope to see more like that -love sarah |
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fearing-laughter Senior Member
since 2001-04-24
Posts 605land of cheese (Wisconsin) |
whoa..dude this one was cool. i started out reading it all slow then as it got more excellent i started reading faster. this is truely a great poem, u should be proud of yourself :-) -fear- |
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kaile
since 2000-02-06
Posts 5146singapore |
raw is the word...i almost feel the speaker's anger...very emotional piece of writing here |
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anonymousfemale Member Elite
since 2000-02-02
Posts 2797Limbo |
Very, very, VERY good work here. Your words cut through my mind like a knife. Blunt words mixed with pure emotions make for one hell of a great piece like this. Excellent job. ~AF~ "I'm not a slave to a God that doesn't exist." |
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TearsOfPearls Member
since 1999-09-23
Posts 322Vereeniging, South-Africa |
Wow! Man...wow...what more can I say, this was an excelent poem! Planning big can be a gamble...I have already rolled the dice! |
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Deranger Member
since 2000-05-10
Posts 498Somewhere, between here and there |
There is some metamorphsis going on in my life. My poetry is only one thing being affected; it's like all the sudden i'm no longer afraid of my violence, i want to use it. I want to see what it will do. It is very frightening. As always, i appreciate your input. I will try to respond to other's work...but i have to work today... Spreading insanity, one post at a time |
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