vase of flowers, in watercolor

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anawnda
Member

since 2002-07-26

Posts 113

0 posted 2002-08-16 03:00 AM

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           "Vase of flowers, in watercolor"

          I am the vase of flowers
          on the canvas you leave unfinished.
          you do not dare complete this scene-
          paint a table with me
          as the centerpiece, a lamp
          for light, glasses for sight,
          a mirror to reflect
          what you see in me.
          No, I exist alone
          in your memory.

          I am the vase of flowers you leave,
          the canvas you leave unfinished.
          your brush could stain my leaves
          with color,
          define the curves of these petals,
          shape this vase you have placed me in.

          Until now, I do not know
          what kind of flower I am to you-
          just one without thorns.
          I am the vase of flowers,
          the vase of flowers you leave unfinished.

          If I asked, would you tell me
          why you cannot picture a room for me
          to live and breathe in?
          or make me bloom as vividly
          as real flowers in your real garden?
          I am the vase you leave,
          the flowers you leave,
          the canvas unfinished.

          you have painted me in watercolor,
          in the blurs and strokes of dreams,
          then left me lonely on this canvas.
          Are you waiting for me to wilt?
          Do you still want me to break?
          Will you water or wash me off with tears?

                    ***********

for christian vasquez

Otaku
Junior Member

since 2002-08-13

Posts 39
Western Australia

1 posted 2002-08-16 06:21 AM

i like the sense of neglect in this poem, and the extended sentences procure frustration....

well thought out......an overall good job!

"Demon slain, the deed is done...."

Marge Tindal

Member Empyrean

since 1999-11-06

Posts 42384
Florida's Foreverly Shores

2 posted 2002-08-16 12:00 PM

Anawnda~
This is just lovely~
Your title captured me ...
I found the 'bouquet' word-fragrant with imagery~
*Hugs*
~*Marge*~

~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
noles1@totcon.com

Sunshine

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-25

Posts 63354
Listening to every heart

3 posted 2002-08-16 09:36 PM

Vasquez is proud...

Skyfire

Member Elite

since 2000-12-27

Posts 3381
Riding

4 posted 2002-08-17 12:53 PM

I like it

I felt it was a little hard to follow the first time through, but the second time it flowed much easier for me (which doesn't say much for my comprehension, does it?).

Nazera29
Junior Member

since 2002-08-14

Posts 34
Connecticut

5 posted 2002-08-17 12:54 PM

i love new metaphors and i think comparing yourself to a painting is brilliant! great job... and it reminds me of all the unfinished artwork i have left behind....

*We are the hero in our own story*

anawnda
Member

since 2002-07-26

Posts 113

6 posted 2002-08-21 02:58 AM

actually this poem is connected with my previous one titled 'christian' its for this guy who at first liked me then just suddenly stopped calling and sending sms, i miss him and it still hurts a lot. also the poem 'thursday' and 'you won' is for christian vasquez also. God love sure sucks

pam
New Member

since 2002-09-17

Posts 1

7 posted 2002-09-17 01:24 AM

hi anawnda! nice one!

hmmmm... is christian vasquez the guy from the "suportahan ta ka" pldt guy?

anawnda
Member

since 2002-07-26

Posts 113

8 posted 2002-09-29 07:54 AM

yup he is that guy. i know him, we go out. i didnt know any1 knows him here, it sure sucks because he mislead me. were just friends now and we go out still but i try to guard my feelings now, i like this other guy now, its been months since i last visited this site.

Local Parasite

Member Elite

since 2001-11-05

Posts 2527
Transylconia, Winnipeg

9 posted 2002-12-05 09:46 PM

Just coming back to add this to my library. Don't mind me.

Brian James
Member

since 2005-06-26

Posts 147
Winnipeg

10 posted 2006-10-28 09:48 PM

This is a really, really good poem. The relatively colloquial diction is a powerful compliment to such subtly profound sentiments as "No, I exist alone / in your memory." I also think "in the blurs and strokes of dreams" is one of my favourite lines of piptalk poetry ever.

Yeesh, I don't know if you'll ever even read this reply, but all the same I have to keepsake this poem in my private library.

"To me, the thing that art does for life is to clean it, to strip it to form."
~Robert Frost

Brian James
Member

since 2005-06-26

Posts 147
Winnipeg

11 posted 2006-10-28 09:48 PM

click!

rhia_5779
Senior Member

since 2006-06-09

Posts 1334
California

12 posted 2006-11-17 11:10 AM

I loved the imagery. You probaly will never read this but thats ok. I post in Teen now.

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