Open Poetry #39 |
A Mad World |
AltairVonCreed Junior Member
since 2006-10-16
Posts 14Nephi, Utah. |
I suppose this would also fit under the dark poetry forum but I'll only post it here. A Mad World She said: "I would miss your hugs" She said: "I would miss your words" She said: "I would miss your image" I don't understand. I could never understand. Why my arms are like pearls around her neck Why my words are like the sweetest verse from a talented poet Why my image is like the shine of a diamond so pure... I don't understand. I could never understand. To me... My arms are like a noose around her neck strangling and chocking my love to death My words are like the shrill cries of crows from above Cawing and trumpeting the death of my love My image is like a fresco of a battle scene bloodied, miserable, and should never be seen... I don't understand. I could never understand... That's why I stand here with a pistol in my hand Do i shoot myself? The ones I love? The ones I hate? Do I shoot those I've never spoken to... A random stranger by me removed Like a mistake, erased. Rubber bits blown away... Or do I crumble the paper instead realising that all of the story is wrong. And needs to be disposed of. Tossed away...away....away... Forgotten in a pile of filth Added to another grand pile of filth Decomposing and disentigartating into dust... blown...away...away...blown away.... |
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© Copyright 2006 Altair 'Von Creed - All Rights Reserved | |||
Marge Tindal
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Altair~ Welcome to PiP~ Only because your critique comment solicits the asking of questions ... I would just say that I don't really understand exactly what this piece is trying to portray .. quote:Could you help me to understand it a little ? Thanks~ *Huglets*:hugs; ~*Marge*~ ~*The sound of a kiss is not as strong as that of a cannon, but it's echo endures much longer*~ |
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AltairVonCreed Junior Member
since 2006-10-16
Posts 14Nephi, Utah. |
Certainly Marge, This peice I tried to depict the lonliness I feel when I'm walking the halls of my school. I'll state now that I'm not suicidal, sometimes you must use extreme words to get a simple messenge across. |
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