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luminosity
Senior Member

since 2005-11-18

Posts 813

0 posted 2006-08-23 11:15 AM

its not as if I am blind
to the excuses I once made
now voided by time
though sometimes I wish to be
but product of my former actions
deliberately frets in front of me
obstructing reality’s view
hindered am I
without meaning to be

its not as if this heaviness
has a season
a winter coat easily removed
a part of my life blood
coursing deep inside of me
has died
leaden it weights my steps
my thought processes weary
on their way to the finish
heavy am I
without meaning to be

and its not as if I could do this
by myself
I have tried
and Lord You and I both know
if able to lay this at Your feet
I would never want to leave
Lord humbly I ask
until You come to take me home
lighten me
for weak and tearful these days am I
without meaning to be

[This message has been edited by luminosity (08-24-2006 11:18 AM).]

Jenn Cirrincione

Member Elite

since 2000-07-02

Posts 2107
Fl

1 posted 2006-08-23 11:16 AM

I like this very much. A deep sadness and frustration here...but at least you are aware...

I love my lil mama's boy!

Interloper

Member Rara Avis

since 2000-11-06

Posts 8369
Deep in the heart

2 posted 2006-08-23 12:39 PM

Ask and you shall receive

Well done!

Fool, said my Muse to me, look in thy heart and write.

Sunshine

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-25

Posts 63354
Listening to every heart

3 posted 2006-08-23 01:30 PM

Just sending hugs, honey.

And a request to remind of where he
would want you to be, now.

Marge Tindal

Member Empyrean

since 1999-11-06

Posts 42384
Florida's Foreverly Shores

4 posted 2006-08-23 02:51 PM

DearLady~
'without meaning to be' ... I can only say that He hears and waits for you to give it to Him ... for He cannot take it from you as long as you hold onto it~

Surrender the load ... for it's burden weighs too heavy for you to shoulder anymore~

He has not given you more than you can carry, only enough to bring you closer to Him, seeking His help in lightening your load~

I promise~

*Huglets*
~*Marge*~

~*The sound of a kiss is not as strong as that of a cannon, but it's echo endures much longer*~
Email - [email protected]

luminosity
Senior Member

since 2005-11-18

Posts 813

5 posted 2006-08-23 03:29 PM

jenn, thank you...

interloper, yes, you are right, maybe i just haven't asked

sunshine...I know lady, I truly believe he give syou words...for you never fail to help my perspective and encourage me

marge...oh lady I know, I know all you say is true...its just not as easy to do as it is to know....thank you so much for your love

Marge Tindal

Member Empyrean

since 1999-11-06

Posts 42384
Florida's Foreverly Shores

6 posted 2006-08-23 04:47 PM

of understanding~

~*The sound of a kiss is not as strong as that of a cannon, but it's echo endures much longer*~
Email - [email protected]

FNG
Member

since 2006-02-07

Posts 477

7 posted 2006-08-25 06:16 AM

This is me now....

you said it so real.

the weight of the past.

Dark Stranger
Member Patricius

since 2001-03-19

Posts 13631
West Coast

8 posted 2006-08-25 07:24 AM

intentional with unintentions...a pleasure to read this lum'

Earth Angel
Member Empyrean

since 2002-08-27

Posts 40215
Realms of Light

9 posted 2006-08-25 10:21 AM

Luminous One, your words weigh heavy on my heart. Yes, our Light can brighten and dim, but it will never die. It is still within you ~ as is He.
I was moved by the responses that you have received from our caring fellow Pipsters ~ especially the ones written by Karilea and Marge. I totally concur with their sentiments ~ as do you, I'm sure.
I have experienced such lows in my life as well ~ ones where I have felt despair and that the Light of my days was ebbing away. I have found that if I fan even the smallest spark of Light in my life with positive thoughts, the inner fire returns.
Encouraging words of others, who are not walking in your moccasins, may fall on deaf ears ~ and that is understandable, but I do believe that your soul hears them.
I have a great deal of compassion ~ and affection ~ for you.
Remember, Luminous One, all will be well!
You will get past these days of darkness.

I am wrapping my arms about you and sending you a sweet summer breeze to fluff up your aura ~ and your angelic feathers!

Loving Light and healing hugs,
EA
P.S. Did I mention how beautifully you expressed your feelings?

suthern

Member Seraphic

since 1999-07-29

Posts 20723
Louisiana

10 posted 2006-08-30 01:44 PM

Lady, if the road to hell is paved with good intentions, surely heaven's path is strewn with "without meaning to be" pebbles. *S* He sees your heart... and it glows with love. *S*

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