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Open Poetry #37
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Unknown Babblings?
| Open Poetry #37 |
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Unknown Babblings? |
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BROTHER JOHN Member
since 2006-04-06
Posts 386 |
Your constructive comments are welcomed. Unknown Babblings? The babbling brook speaks tongues in foreign rhyme Schemes, gaiting with sublime sounds of sheer joy Which finds and winds its way from ancient Troy Of old. Now ... whisper rhymes of bygone time. The babbling, singing brooks of beauty chime With bells and singing choirs in French Savoy In tongues unknown.From my depths, they employ My spirit: "Sing their anthems so sublime!" Today's arms of flesh hold the future tight And that "far future's" near in earthenwear And diapers, stitched with heavenly starlight! From precious depths, spring babblings everywhere: Angelic tongues!Yet we know with delight, They speak of love and heaven's tender care! |
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| © Copyright 2006 BROTHER JOHN - All Rights Reserved | |||
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LeeJ Member Patricius
since 2003-06-19
Posts 13296 |
From precious depths, spring babblings everywhere: Angelic tongues!Yet we know with delight, They speak of love and heaven's tender care! what a wonderful time to look at spring's dress... loverly!!!! |
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Pauline Junior Member
since 2006-05-15
Posts 28Island in the Sun... |
A delightful babble? Absolutely! |
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Jack Straw Member
since 2006-03-02
Posts 70 |
enjoyed this piece but I noticed one thing "Sing their song of the sublime!" sounds a little jumbled or crammed, maybe try sing their song so sublime! if you want. |
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BROTHER JOHN Member
since 2006-04-06
Posts 386 |
Dear Jack, Thanks for your advice. I was not satisfied with that line for some reason. I was able to exchange song for anthem and an anthem carries with it more of the sublime than just the word song. Your suggestion has made the reading smoother. I welcome your suggestions anytime. BJ |
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BROTHER JOHN Member
since 2006-04-06
Posts 386 |
Dear Pauline, Thank you for stopping by and reading my babblings. You have helped to make my day. The blessings of heaven rest on you. BJ |
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BROTHER JOHN Member
since 2006-04-06
Posts 386 |
Dear LeeJ Thank you for your kind remarks. This one is new and I am still trying to work out some rough places. Have a good evening. BJ |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
BROTHER JOHN The babbling of the brook plays fife The dancing is the dance of life. Enjoyed |
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XOx Uriah xOX Senior Member
since 2006-02-11
Posts 1403Virginia |
Angels (messengers) that speak in an unknown tongue. Those who hear either hear in their native tongue and attach their own concepts or...the messenger appears drunk...babbling foolishness. No matter. Who speaks? Who hears? Who can stop the chorus? The music plays ! Even though some may be "wallflowers" and do not dance...they are still attending the celebration. LOL blah blah blah |
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Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
Wonderful!! I love it when you 'babble'.  A most excellent write. Hugs~Nancy ~ Trace my body with your words, |
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BROTHER JOHN Member
since 2006-04-06
Posts 386 |
Dear Seymour, When I read your works, I get that sense of dance. You really enjoy life and putting it into beautiful words. BJ |
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BROTHER JOHN Member
since 2006-04-06
Posts 386 |
Dear Uriah, Thanks for your comments. Yes, life is beautiful when we live it as a celebration. |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
outstanding! the word change was good  |
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BROTHER JOHN Member
since 2006-04-06
Posts 386 |
Dear Enchantress, Again you have taken time to stop and read another one of my "tries." Thank you for your words of love. Blessings on you! |
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BROTHER JOHN Member
since 2006-04-06
Posts 386 |
Dear passing shadows, Thank you for your remarks. PIP would not be the same without you. Your shadow glows all over this site! |
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