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Open Poetry #36
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LeeJ
Member Patricius
since 2003-06-19
Posts 13296


0 posted 2005-10-28 08:46 AM


poor-ass smoke,
darts me off like a lover
sharp green eyes
hangs onto every one of my fingers
drunk on no particulars
simply hooked on the curious…

do we ever hear the background noise?
or really taste that bottle of beer?
go figure…
he threw darts at me, like popcorn
in a movie theater

whipping my ass..
flecking fast balls towards me
like a pitcher in the world series
i was screaming
feeling my way around in the dark

then
all of a sudden,
there it was
the lottery ticket
with secret numbers of
probability, tormenting
tantalizing me
with hopes of
fortune

sweet, thrilling surprise
of first impression
in the shape of imagination
mine!
somehow deciving first impressions
oh the lies we tell to ourselves!

talk about the transformation of
dreaming a little!

well,
he orders a bottle for himself
telling all my secrets
withdrawing the forthy thousand
from my bank account
he’s well fed and hot now

and i had to take a swig from that bottle
bam!
bam!
bam!
his stint undresses at “his” leisure
rubbing his bare chest
like a wanna be fur coat
unbuttoning slumber
and summer
followed by clouds
where bareness weeps embarassment

he drove me to the station
where dogs tore at my flesh
it was like the hotel california
the one you can never leave
the one you never forget!

i whined like a beggar
while he fondled my mind with
hypocrytical slander
wishing me every kind of misfortune
like a religion with a pretty face

taking my daydreams
shuffling them..
his eyes ordered my faith
reinstating my faults
to a bloody rape
of his life
his voice that spit in my face

damnation, darkens the eyes
you know
turns the heart into a code blue
chill

his resolute face, listless
served an elegant
move
an enormous load of white sugar
unsympathetic
filled with ego
and a wedding cake of ceremonial
shop windows…
i held my tongue and listened
one thing that he couldn’t steal
it was my nightmare
that trimmed black beard of his
danced all over, like a doll, inventing
housework
and a solumn truth of infidelity
God, I hated those woman, who
Believed him to…
cuts you like the
long sharp teeth of black demons
drewling for your soul
your mind
any sanity at all
you claim for yours

closing the door to any human shapes
carrying a tray of instant worthlessness
nailing my chest to his petrified wood
the dumb ass….
he was that kind of stranger
you didn’t know much about
but shoulda

perpetually, i’m still haunted
by that book that reads
“sleeping with the enemy”
makes grey footprints in white snow
pooping all over that white steed...

i’m still looking over my shoulder
even though he’s remarried
poor poor girl!

sheesh, and i so believed in love?
there is no damn excuse for the red
ink, he poured all over my child
his high hooked shoulders
damn, how quickly people change
after marriage?

gives a whole new meaning to
“beware of the dog”

still hitting myself in the forehead
screaming
Stupid’
Stupid
Stupid

But alive, very alive, doing well!

think I'll claim that winning lottery ticket now~

[This message has been edited by LeeJ (10-28-2005 09:51 AM).]

© Copyright 2005 Lee J. - All Rights Reserved
Earth Angel
Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215
Realms of Light
1 posted 2005-10-28 09:41 AM


Lee, that was brilliant! You had my emotions running all over the place!

At one point I cracked right up! ~ "rubbing his bare chest
like a wanna be fur coat"! Gawd, girl! That was hysterical!

You had so many clever lines in this poetic gem, that they all bear repeating! ~ and keeping!

Have a glorious day! You deserve it!

~ and now you get to keep all the money from winning lottery tickets!

Love & Life,
Linda


SEA
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 Tours
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676
with you
2 posted 2005-10-28 10:14 AM


"i’m still looking over my shoulder
even though he’s remarried
poor poor girl!

sheesh, and i so believed in love?
there is no damn excuse for the red
ink, he poured all over my child
his high hooked shoulders
damn, how quickly people change
after marriage?

gives a whole new meaning to
“beware of the dog”

still hitting myself in the forehead
screaming
Stupid’
Stupid
Stupid

But alive, very alive, doing well!"
oh Lee, you can't know just how exactly perfect this is.... oh my gosh! I'm so keeping this

suthern
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Seraphic
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723
Louisiana
3 posted 2005-10-28 03:54 PM


Oh, wow... such a powerful write... I don't think I remembered to breathe as I read... I know I was breathless by the end!

As for that lottery ticket... you're due! *S*

Angelheart
Senior Member
since 2005-09-08
Posts 754
Jacksonville,FL USA
4 posted 2005-10-28 04:18 PM


very well put, thanks for sharing.

Poetry can get you very far
-Laura

nakdthoughts
Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200
Between the Lines
5 posted 2005-10-28 05:07 PM


whined like a beggar
while he fondled my mind with
hypocrytical slander
wishing me every kind of misfortune
like a religion with a pretty face

wow... a good read for thought


M

Jason Lyle
Senior Member
since 2003-02-07
Posts 1438
With my darkling
6 posted 2005-10-28 05:13 PM


Great write,.. Great read!

Jason

MGROVES
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2004-02-01
Posts 3802
california
7 posted 2005-10-30 02:18 AM


good one lee. i have missed your writings

My spirit will rise
above the sea~
There will be no drowning
of my soul or me~

StevenS
Senior Member
since 2005-09-21
Posts 945
L. A. (Lower Alabama)
8 posted 2005-10-30 07:21 AM


Great Write LeeJ, glad you survived. From where I'm sitting, I would say he was the stupid one. Wishing you all the best.
Enchantress
Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113
Canada eh.
9 posted 2005-10-30 08:47 AM


Excellent write Lee!
You continue to blow me away with your writing.
Absolutely astounding!!
Hugs~Nancy

  ~Time has cast a spell on you,
   So you won't ever forget me.~

inkedgoddess
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-11-19
Posts 7392
Ohio
10 posted 2005-10-30 10:41 AM


closing the door to any human shapes
carrying a tray of instant worthlessness
nailing my chest to his petrified wood
the dumb ass….
he was that kind of stranger
you didn’t know much about
but shoulda

your writing never cuts a corner when telling it like it is is in order
makes a good case for not wanting to trust again so fast

Magnus
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Laureate
since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135
South Carolina, USA
11 posted 2005-10-30 11:04 AM


I knew you were good, but Lordy,  never in
my imagination did I think you could pull
this rabbit out of your poetic hat!!!

Bravo!!

Cloud 9
Senior Member
since 2004-11-05
Posts 980
Ca
12 posted 2005-11-02 05:33 PM


and a solumn truth of infidelity
God, I hated those woman, who
Believed him to

__________________________

sheesh, and i so believed in love?
there is no damn excuse for the red
ink, he poured all over my child
his high hooked shoulders
damn, how quickly people change
after marriage?

gives a whole new meaning to
“beware of the dog”

still hitting myself in the forehead
screaming
Stupid’
Stupid
Stupid


I can honestly say........I was warned.

Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
13 posted 2005-11-02 06:58 PM


LeeJ

I could see myself in your words, many years ago after the ever after died unhappy.  So very well done!!  

garysgirl
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Laureate
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237
Florida, USA
14 posted 2005-11-10 06:04 AM


Lee, this is a powerful write and I
loved reading it!! You are such a good writer!!
Hugs,
Ethel

JL
Member Ascendant
since 2004-04-01
Posts 6128
Texas, USA
15 posted 2005-11-10 08:42 AM


Well now…
My curiosity is sticking out its nose.  What spurred this marvelous write?
Very interesting read Lee J, very nice.


JL

Ratleader
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Rara Avis
since 2003-01-23
Posts 7026
Visiting Earth on a Guest Pass
16 posted 2005-11-19 10:59 AM


I'm so glad I've come a-foraging here today!

I woke up hungry for poetry somehow....in spite of a rejection notice yesterday in which an editor asked me if I'd ever actually read his journal...of which I had four issues within arms' reach at that moment~~~~ouch!~~~~

~~(¸¸¸¸ºº>   ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº>  ~~(¸¸ ¸¸ºº>    ~~~(¸¸ER¸¸ºº>
______________Ratleader______________

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