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Open Poetry #35
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The Smell Of Pine (2)
| Open Poetry #35 |
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The Smell Of Pine (2) |
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Tiersdin Member Elite
since 2000-11-17
Posts 2364east coast |
(His Point of View) I found her stranded on some deserted road where she waited so long dust coated her baked brown toes and the polish was in need of polishing anew she didn't for a while acknowledge my presence her gaze fixed upon tracks leading far into the distance as if she could see into eternity I studied her wondering why she waited knowing the bus had come and gone long ago that whomever she waited for was long gone too I tried to see what held her attention so completely down the old deserted road 'til my eyes burned from the glare I saw nothing, no one and I knew better than ask... Instead, I picked up her once brightly colored bag and reached for her hand she didn't protest as I pulled her gently toward tomorrow where love was no guess but warm and waiting I needed reassurance of eyes- confirmation that she understood this was for the best but her head drooped ike a daisy yeilding to wind soft dark curls spilled into her face leaving only peach kissed cheeks now waterfalled with tears and a mouth trembling in need of his kiss whomever he was the drive home was quiet she stared out of the window lost in thoughts I could only imagine I longed to drown her sadness into my heart to love any memories of him into oblivion Inside, I cried too for reasons she knew and others she diddn't was I settle? could I live with that? home is where the heart is, I heard someone say and was she not willing to come home with me? I glanced over her grief with a grief of my own "I love you" she looked at me then her eyes filled with a strange mix of empathy and mystery a smile appeared, ever so slight an unsure sun on an overcast day I felt my heart twist in the most peculiar fashion as I turned away to watch the road ahead blur into colors and waves I felt her hand reach and grasp my own I knew then that I would do all in my power to recall her heart to me win her back with deeds, not words through tenderness real not rejection with patience and willingness to change if need be today, I find I loathe to the depths of me, the smell of pine... ~tier  |
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| © Copyright 2005 R.T. Webster-Mosby - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
she didn't protest as I pulled her gently toward tomorrow where love was no guess but warm and waiting ~*~ this was just the start of the tear-jerker...  |
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SEA 
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676with you |
you need to link part one in here...cause now I have to go find it! *sigh* this is one for pulling on the heartstrings for sure! excellent write |
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Susan Caldwell Member Rara Avis
since 2002-12-27
Posts 8348Florida |
of for the love of god... I want to bake for him! and iron his shirts... "too bad ignorance isn't painful" ~Unknown~ |
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Cloud 9 Senior Member
since 2004-11-05
Posts 980Ca |
This is the first time I have read something and found myself crying at the same time. I love this. |
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Startime55 Member Elite
since 2003-04-05
Posts 2148Alberta, Canada |
WOW!!! My heart broke upon so many tears flowing freely as I read this poem....Deep into my heart the story went to release tears that were shed with sharing...Magnificent...*hugs* |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Tiersdin Very touching....you did this so well with just the right amount of timing, imagery and empathy! |
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Tiersdin Member Elite
since 2000-11-17
Posts 2364east coast |
Thank you all for your warm and touching replies. love you all, ~tier |
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littlewing Member Rara Avis
since 2003-03-02
Posts 9655New York |
Ok, this is a short story - OMFG . . . Tier . . . I am at a loss for words. This truly brought me right there, each and every word, m'Lady. You are beyond gifted. |
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iliana Member Patricius
since 2003-12-05
Posts 13434USA |
Great write, Tier! |
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Ericc Member Elite
since 2003-01-31
Posts 4178 |
Beautiful, beautiful write. Eric |
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A Romantic Heart Member Ascendant
since 1999-09-03
Posts 5496Forever In Your Heart |
I love pine trees, the title pulled me in, and then the poem (story) was just the topping on the cake... Great poetry/Story!  ~ARh "Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take - but by the moments that take our breath away." |
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LeeJ Member Patricius
since 2003-06-19
Posts 13296 |
Inside, I cried too for reasons she knew and others she diddn't was I settle? could I live with that? sometimes and especially in this case, settle was worth waiting for, well worth waiting for....hugs and many thanks for a great read and story....(sigh) |
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