Open Poetry #35 |
Dark and Hot Night |
DavePage Member Elite
since 2003-12-21
Posts 2917 |
It was a dark and hot night The battlements were drawn Images glided switching space Before positions Finally drawn Spikes came down wood early raised Fought in silent battles That others in haze Paid In the glare of a rabbits night Mothers sisters swarming with belief of Queen Bee Leaving the discussion of carcase for the workers Who failed To support the winning bee And the hive For all would favour the Queen Bee Soldiers would march for her Workers salivate And feelings would run high By the gates So a Queen arrives Heralded at the gate Taking to the air She moves To concentrate Now a swarm of bees Follows An idea Despising nature They swarm And on a winters day They find their own way Driven by belief They find relief And an old tree By the way |
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Kethry Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-29
Posts 9082Victoria Australia |
I like the way this just rolls off the tongue but has levels of meaning that require a second and possibly a third reading. Good job with this. Here in the midst of my lonely abyss, a single joy I find...your presence in my mind. Unknown |
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Margherita Member Seraphic
since 2003-02-08
Posts 22236Eternity |
And on a winters day They find their own way Driven by belief They find relief And an old tree Great metaphores in this one, dear Dave, as I see it. Love, Margherita |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
It is natural... it is nature. Enjoyed this very much, Dave. |
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iliana Member Patricius
since 2003-12-05
Posts 13434USA |
Great write, Dave! |
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DavePage Member Elite
since 2003-12-21
Posts 2917 |
Kethry I like the way this just rolls off the tongue but has levels of meaning that require a second and possibly a third reading. Good job with this. Here in the midst of my lonely abyss, a single joy I find...your presence in my mind. Unknown It was an offshoot of an idea but there is only one Queen in the Hive. Thanks Dave Margherita And on a winters day They find their own way Driven by belief They find relief And an old tree Great metaphores in this one, dear Dave, as I see it. Love, Margherita Thanks Margherita I suppose I do a cop out in my poems but the swarm having left with the defeated Queen, if still alive finds a place but it is always just postponing the future. Dave Sunshine It is natural... it is nature. Enjoyed this very much, Dave. Thanks Sunshine but then we start killing each other and it is wrong. The strength determining power of Government leaves it built on strength not intelligence and a better strategy always works so more suffer through strength without thought than weakness with intelligence which allows people to empower themselves. Dave iliana Great write, Dave! Thanks iliana. Dave |
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froggy Senior Member
since 2003-06-23
Posts 1893Michigan |
Hi Dave, This is a superb write. Enjoyed the read. :-) Within this heart you'll find love |
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DavePage Member Elite
since 2003-12-21
Posts 2917 |
Thanks Froggy. Dave |
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MGROVES
since 2004-02-01
Posts 3802california |
great write~
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A Romantic Heart Member Ascendant
since 1999-09-03
Posts 5496Forever In Your Heart |
I agree with the above, brilliant writing! ~ARH We attract hearts by the qualities we display, we retain them by the qualities we possess.~Jean Baptiste Antoine Suard |
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