What was I thinking?
Am I even thinking at all?
I am confused, I am refused
The answer I have been seeking,
The one I have needed for so long,
Can I find that answer in you?
Can I find my answer in us?
What is it that is upsetting??
For I have not a clue,
I misunderstand,
But that is not you.
I feel so far from this
Place of mine,
My sanctuary, my heart,
Your purist heart.
But I am lost,
And no one shall find me,
I fear I am closing
Wrapping myself in
A cocoon.
This is different from the ordinary,
I do not plan to come out
A beautiful butterfly,
In fact,
I do not plan to come out at all.
It is easy to say
Easier said than done
But I feel I will not fail
Like I have everything else,
I am no longer empty
So I must run and hide,
I cannot face the pain
Of being cared for.
Loneliness, independence,
My true sanctuary,
I have come back,
Please,
Come welcome me home.