Open Poetry #34 |
Swan Song........a repost |
Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Swan Song He was only ten and sometimes unsure teasing seemed to aim its arrow at him and he fell into thinking something was wrong with him with his skinny arms with his freckles something At a park where the ducks were he was scattering the birds throwing pieces of bread into the lake where two swans were engaged in a love dance their necks and heads bobbing His mother explained it when he was nine and full of questions, neat is what he thought into the warm spring day Two boys with bats snickering behind their hands threw rocks skipped the water and caught one swan on the side Anger grew inside him as he headed towards the two now collapsed in gales of laughter They looked up in surprise at the anger trembling blotched cheeks the clenched fists for the words that he hit them with were power he learned that day as he left the boys sitting with their mouths open He took off his jacket flung it over his shoulder, and holding it with one finger he whistled as he walked away knowing there was something right something right about him something _________ 1-24-01 |
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© Copyright 2005 Martie Odell Ingebretsen - All Rights Reserved | |||
Mysteria
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328British Columbia, Canada |
Sure was! Compassion being a very good quality indeed. Loved the scene in this almost a Norman Rockwell gone wrong then back good again, you know? |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
I remember this keeper. I remember the power of it; which has not left this I also remember why. |
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Ratleader
since 2003-01-23
Posts 7026Visiting Earth on a Guest Pass |
You knew me then -- well I'll be damned! ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸ ¸¸ºº> ~~~(¸¸ER¸¸ºº> |
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littlewing Member Rara Avis
since 2003-03-02
Posts 9655New York |
Martie, I adore this because it reminds me of my own son, who has a beautiful soul and only those close to him see it. Swan song indeed. Just remember it is those that practice what they believe, like you have written that truly make a difference (for the good) in this world. Beautiful analogy. |
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Gentle Spirit Member Patricius
since 2000-10-09
Posts 13989 |
Amazing Martie, beauty of depth in these words... |
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LeeJ Member Patricius
since 2003-06-19
Posts 13296 |
power of compassion is great...and so are your words...building a picture perfect mind scene...lovely girl...thank you for sharing |
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Dark Angel Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095 |
Oh my, this is sooo beautiful Martie. Smiling wide here.. love you lady Maree and i knew in the crystalline knowledge of you |
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Lighthousebob Member Elite
since 2000-06-14
Posts 4725California |
There are times that I could use a tune like that myself. (Smiles) I'm so glad that you gave me the opportunity to read your poem. Thank you for reposting. You are a wonderful story teller and, yes, he (the young boy) certainly did show a marvelous character trait here by restraining himself in a time, I'm sure, of anger and hostility as I was kind of feeling that way myself while only reading your poem. Enjoyed reading. (whistle-whistle). -Bob |
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latearrival Member Ascendant
since 2003-03-21
Posts 5499Florida |
Having three sons,I can see how beautiful this is. thank you,marty |
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Susan Member Ascendant
since 2004-03-27
Posts 5104walking the surreal |
Yay! Love the ending - Susan If I wander far enough, long enough, will I finally know . . . |
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Suetang Member Ascendant
since 2001-03-07
Posts 5187Melbourne, Australia |
A truly wonderful write, Martie. Take care.........Sue I am in motion |
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Goodknight Member Elite
since 2002-06-15
Posts 2386Ohio, USA |
this is such a good story - I loved this Martie - thanks for sharing it again - Paul |
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ice Member Elite
since 2003-05-17
Posts 3404Pennsylvania |
My goodness, dear friend, how you can paint a picture from memory...things like this give me hope that compassion lives among the discompassionet of this world... I love "people" poems, and this one is very good...enjoyed it __________ice ><> |
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James_A_Fraser Senior Member
since 2003-09-03
Posts 972Out Making Anticlines |
This is me as a kid....after I got past the mean stage, at least. But I wouldn't have led with words and probably still wouldn't....I have a really good throwing arm, and my words would follow an example to the kid of how it feels to be hit by a rock. There's no lesson quite so effective as feeling it yourself. ~~J |
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vandana
since 1999-10-22
Posts 10463USA |
good |
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