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Open Poetry #34
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ethome
Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858
New Brunswick Canada

0 posted 2005-01-25 02:35 AM


A Gift Left Behind

The breath of spring was wild and free
just after a winter's freeze
and the colorful birds of the eastern region
were singing with gracious ease.

The river was blue like the clearing sky
the waves in the breezes played.
The soil of the land was moist and prime
for seed in the month of May

High on a hill a man stared from a field
his drawn face character lined,
he watched the Terns as they rolled and reeled
on winds of familiar time.

He drew waves of soul from his past
from memories of a young man,
his true love had come to him so fast
like a child he asked for her hand.

Beneath the starlit skies at night
his arms held her beauty so fair
Her golden hair in the soft moonlight
left a vision beyond compare.

But now her pleading voice filled his ears
"move on," she cried, "move on."
Her final calling had come that year
and then she was ghastly gone.


He recalled....

When the wagons creaked and the wheels squeaked
and cedar rails marked the time
when family dreams ruled supreme
and together was a frame of mind.
Now a Cadillac sits by the old woodshed
while the wagon rots in the barn
and the old homestead where the children lived
plays host to an old man's charms.

Then into his thoughts broke a sweet sound
to bring back the dead from the past
across the field there came running abound
a small curly haired lass.

"Grandpa, Grandpa," was her jubuilant shout,
"I've come to stay over the night!"
and into his arms she jumped just about
knocking him down with delight.

Her small face cradled next to his neck
he fought back the tears in his eyes.
Out of his vision came life out of death
in a gift that his love left behind.

IF YOU HAVE TO JUDGE SOMEONE DO IT ON THE SIDE OF MERCY AND LET TIME SEASON THE RESULTS.

© Copyright 2005 Eric Lewis True - All Rights Reserved
nakdthoughts
Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200
Between the Lines
1 posted 2005-01-25 07:25 AM


Out of his vision came life out of death
in a gift that his love left behind.


Not sure why E, but I loved this story and could envision it all~~
beautifully done (rhyme, rhythm and song)

*s
M

Dark Angel
Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095

2 posted 2005-01-25 07:34 AM


loved this very much

M

and i knew in the crystalline knowledge of you
~Buckingham/Nicks

Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
3 posted 2005-01-25 10:30 AM



You knew, you knew
this would find a place
in my library...

Karilea - if I whisper, will you listen?  Keeping in mind, I must stand close...and keep my promises...

LeeJ
Member Patricius
since 2003-06-19
Posts 13296

4 posted 2005-01-25 10:59 AM


Her small face cradled next to his neck
he fought back the tears in his eyes.
Out of his vision came life out of death
in a gift that his love left behind.


IF YOU HAVE TO JUDGE SOMEONE DO IT ON THE SIDE OF MERCY AND LET TIME SEASON THE RESULTS.
Not only did I love this poem, but agree with time's seasoning ......tremendous write

RSWells
Member Elite
since 2001-06-17
Posts 2533

5 posted 2005-01-25 11:24 AM


Really liked what you did with your phonetic near rhymes in your mostly A,B,C,B stanzas;

free
region

sky
prime

lined,
time.

man,
hand.

past
lass.

neck
death

This is harder to do than you made it look. The flow was great as well.


Poets against the war is redundant

DavePage
Member Elite
since 2003-12-21
Posts 2917

6 posted 2005-01-25 12:06 PM


I really like the words and the vision, and the message.

Excellent.

Dave

*Alli4000*
Deputy Moderator 10 Tours
Member Elite
since 2004-03-21
Posts 3188
The World of Poetry
7 posted 2005-01-25 07:11 PM


amazing....

~Alli~

Happy 2005!

saved_by_grace
Member
since 2005-01-08
Posts 332
In the arms of God...
8 posted 2005-01-25 07:39 PM


This was SOOO beautiful, ethome!  I will be adding this to my every growing library.



Becka

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