Open Poetry #34 |
A Gift Left Behind |
ethome Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858New Brunswick Canada |
A Gift Left Behind The breath of spring was wild and free just after a winter's freeze and the colorful birds of the eastern region were singing with gracious ease. The river was blue like the clearing sky the waves in the breezes played. The soil of the land was moist and prime for seed in the month of May High on a hill a man stared from a field his drawn face character lined, he watched the Terns as they rolled and reeled on winds of familiar time. He drew waves of soul from his past from memories of a young man, his true love had come to him so fast like a child he asked for her hand. Beneath the starlit skies at night his arms held her beauty so fair Her golden hair in the soft moonlight left a vision beyond compare. But now her pleading voice filled his ears "move on," she cried, "move on." Her final calling had come that year and then she was ghastly gone. He recalled.... When the wagons creaked and the wheels squeaked and cedar rails marked the time when family dreams ruled supreme and together was a frame of mind. Now a Cadillac sits by the old woodshed while the wagon rots in the barn and the old homestead where the children lived plays host to an old man's charms. Then into his thoughts broke a sweet sound to bring back the dead from the past across the field there came running abound a small curly haired lass. "Grandpa, Grandpa," was her jubuilant shout, "I've come to stay over the night!" and into his arms she jumped just about knocking him down with delight. Her small face cradled next to his neck he fought back the tears in his eyes. Out of his vision came life out of death in a gift that his love left behind. IF YOU HAVE TO JUDGE SOMEONE DO IT ON THE SIDE OF MERCY AND LET TIME SEASON THE RESULTS. |
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© Copyright 2005 Eric Lewis True - All Rights Reserved | |||
nakdthoughts Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200Between the Lines |
Out of his vision came life out of death in a gift that his love left behind. Not sure why E, but I loved this story and could envision it all~~ beautifully done (rhyme, rhythm and song) *s M |
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Dark Angel Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095 |
loved this very much M and i knew in the crystalline knowledge of you |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
You knew, you knew this would find a place in my library... Karilea - if I whisper, will you listen? Keeping in mind, I must stand close...and keep my promises... |
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LeeJ Member Patricius
since 2003-06-19
Posts 13296 |
Her small face cradled next to his neck he fought back the tears in his eyes. Out of his vision came life out of death in a gift that his love left behind. IF YOU HAVE TO JUDGE SOMEONE DO IT ON THE SIDE OF MERCY AND LET TIME SEASON THE RESULTS. Not only did I love this poem, but agree with time's seasoning ......tremendous write |
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RSWells Member Elite
since 2001-06-17
Posts 2533 |
Really liked what you did with your phonetic near rhymes in your mostly A,B,C,B stanzas; free region sky prime lined, time. man, hand. past lass. neck death This is harder to do than you made it look. The flow was great as well. Poets against the war is redundant |
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DavePage Member Elite
since 2003-12-21
Posts 2917 |
I really like the words and the vision, and the message. Excellent. Dave |
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*Alli4000*
since 2004-03-21
Posts 3188The World of Poetry |
amazing.... ~Alli~ Happy 2005! |
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saved_by_grace Member
since 2005-01-08
Posts 332In the arms of God... |
This was SOOO beautiful, ethome! I will be adding this to my every growing library. Becka |
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