Open Poetry #34 |
Electronic Attatchment |
green_itchy_stuff Senior Member
since 2003-06-26
Posts 1929New Caney, Tx |
I hold this machine I seem to be attatched This wild beast But when I tame it Learning how simple Satan is Who says I can't Rub in the press Tough without cuts The pin prick about an inch wide And a fuzzy scream The same scream, The same scream, The same scream, ... You start to feel it The twidle of your heart With the vibrations Tight then loose Slow then fast It feels like a vibrating strobe light at first And progresses Kicks and jolts Look up and you've lost it Hours and hours of this violent slam and crash You wake up at the sound of a watch beeping Put everything away Take a breather Relax as you loose consciousness to sleep, You feel beatten like a break You'll do it again tomorrow ---------------------------------- this one seems kinda raw and uncut like it could use some fixing. If you have any suggestions feel free. lol. Corruption is caused by holes in obedience to God. |
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© Copyright 2005 Kenneth Craig Rogers - All Rights Reserved | |||
RSWells Member Elite
since 2001-06-17
Posts 2533 |
Sounds like an interveneous drug addiction. Well that's my take (although it could be cyber addiction I suppose). Have no suggestions, only if you're uncertain just before posting something it sometimes helps to discipline oneself and try and sit on the post a day or two and look at it with fresh eyes seeing if it says what you wanted it to and are satisfied. It is necessary that YOU be satisfied. Poets against the war is redundant |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
I always say write what comes to you when it comes my muse leaves me too much these days for me not to just jump in when she is there |
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green_itchy_stuff Senior Member
since 2003-06-26
Posts 1929New Caney, Tx |
Yeah thanks. I was basically asking for pointers because it felt a little raw. Its actually not about drugs, my guitar rather. lol. That is basically what I do, just jump in. I guess it just felt like, it could have used some juice. lol -GIS Corruption is caused by holes in obedience to God. |
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Copperbell Senior Member
since 2003-11-08
Posts 956 |
I figured it was about your guitar You just get lost in the music - I love that |
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green_itchy_stuff Senior Member
since 2003-06-26
Posts 1929New Caney, Tx |
Yeah, music rocks. lol. -GIS Corruption is caused by holes in obedience to God. |
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