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Open Poetry #33
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| Open Poetry #33 |
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Untitled |
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Susan Member Ascendant
since 2004-03-27
Posts 5104walking the surreal 
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Do I look like That back seat of a jeep Kinda girl? Stolen kisses In frozen moments Tangled limbs In hurried abandon Trying to absorb All we can Before the tick of clock Says the hour is over And its back again to the four door sedan Yeah, okay, Maybe I am. s.a.t. As you know, I like to play around, try on different shoes, make my words play to different tunes or paces. When I do this, I would appreciate knowing if it works. Thanks  Happiness isn't something that happens to you, it's created from within you. Joy is a state of mind. |
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| © Copyright 2004 s.a.t. - All Rights Reserved | |||
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
Nice... and yes'm, this does indeed work for me! (I like to try on different moods and tone in writing too!) I enjoyed muchly, Susan! |
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Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
Excellent...I love stepping outside myself and trying on different hats ..LOL. I know this person is not you. But it is fun to try to see and write from another viewpoint. You wrote this very well!! Hugs~ ~Somewhere in my heart I'm always |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
pretty neat...I don't play around with different things, but maybe I should start *shrug* |
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Magnus
since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135South Carolina, USA |
I am trying to think of a title for this piece. I can see and feel it clearly... though I agree...that is not YOU!!... perhaps an alter ego? like a lizard that changes colors to match the habitat...NO, you are not a lizard, OK? Please, keep the knives in a safe place...NOT in my back or backside...sheesh.... |
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Ericc Member Elite
since 2003-01-31
Posts 4178 |
It worked! Eric |
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Susan Member Ascendant
since 2004-03-27
Posts 5104walking the surreal |
Ah, thank you kindly. I wondered about posting this one, it was a lot of fun, I'm glad it works. I'll have to play some more. btw, Barry, no slicing and dicing, promise  I couldn't figure a title for it. Suggestions are welcome Susan Happiness isn't something that happens to you, it's created from within you. Joy is a state of mind. |
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iliana Member Patricius
since 2003-12-05
Posts 13434USA |
Much enjoyed. Susan, believe it or not I wrote a "back seat" poem about a month ago, but couldn't get it together so it is still sitting in my poetry folder. I understand what you mean about trying on different shoes; that's part of the creative process, I think.  ....jo |
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inkedgoddess Member Rara Avis
since 2002-11-19
Posts 7392Ohio |
Stolen kisses In frozen moments Tangled limbs yes, the heat, the passion, the entwined lines of legs and arms....yes yes the 10 minute rendevous |
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Margherita Member Seraphic
since 2003-02-08
Posts 22236Eternity |
Frozen moments to melt the hearts long after they are lived ... you created a very vivid scene of desire. Brava. Love, Margherita |
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ThisDiamond Member Rara Avis
since 2002-02-22
Posts 9353Michigan, USA |
Appreciate all your different shoes kiddo... Great write. TD |
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Susan Member Ascendant
since 2004-03-27
Posts 5104walking the surreal |
Thanks dear friends -- what would I do without your encouragment and kindness -- love you -- Susan Happiness isn't something that happens to you, it's created from within you. Joy is a state of mind. |
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