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Open Poetry #33
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The Jazz of Rain
| Open Poetry #33 |
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The Jazz of Rain |
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Greeneyes  
since 2000-09-09
Posts 9903In Your Poetic Mind 
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These are the stormy days fragile, thick as air where hours grow darker just below veils of midnight Somewhere, lovers create their own patterns yet I await black eyes reaching for stillness-- artless motion -- movement of crimson I have waited for this storm greeted it knowing the moon would never settle for pure white I have sought for years to remember the tender notes or how air would fill the sky with amber hues or the smudge of fingerprints on hollow gray {and I cannot remember what the color of roses mean 'he loves me no he loves me not'} My frustrated desires have lead me astray that I would have to admit -- I am always walking one-step behind the dream The final green-- we pick up the moments toss them aside for anything that will make us happy the saying is in the paintings we only pause for each lesson learned it was on a Friday night when I remembered how the jazz of rain has affected my life ~~**~~ {Greatly inspired and Muse dedicated} I've tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone though you're still with me I've been alone all along..Now I'm bound by the life you left behind |
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| © Copyright 2004 Lauren~ - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Lauren "The final green-- we pick up the moments toss them aside for anything that will make us happy the saying is in the paintings we only pause for each lesson learned" I wish that I knew the secret of your beauty. It is so apparent in your words. |
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Startime55 Member Elite
since 2003-04-05
Posts 2148Alberta, Canada |
**sigh** The beauty of your words draw gentleness from the heart....Stunning write... |
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Ratleader
since 2003-01-23
Posts 7026Visiting Earth on a Guest Pass |
I can only see this through a man's eyes....but there is so much in it that my limitations don't matter very much. Your poems bless, and they teach. I hope you know that. ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸ ¸¸ºº> ~~~(¸¸ER¸¸ºº> |
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Susan Member Ascendant
since 2004-03-27
Posts 5104walking the surreal |
truly an artistic write filled with stirring beauty. susan Happiness isn't something that happens to you, it's created from within you. Joy is a state of mind. |
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Kahlil Senior Member
since 2003-04-12
Posts 1881 |
...beautifully painful and haunting... |
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iliana Member Patricius
since 2003-12-05
Posts 13434USA |
"The final green-- we pick up the moments toss them aside for anything that will make us happy the saying is in the paintings we only pause for each lesson learned" *Sigh* I find myself doing that sometimes, too, Lauren. Good write.  ....jo |
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Gentle Spirit Member Patricius
since 2000-10-09
Posts 13989 |
smiling at you sis....even when you hurt, you are so very beautiful.... and your words allow us to see your beauty. love you girlie....  |
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Susan Caldwell Member Rara Avis
since 2002-12-27
Posts 8348Florida |
Always a wonderful read when it's your work. "cast me gently into the morning, for the night has been unkind" |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
Somewhere, lovers create their own patterns yet I await black eyes reaching for stillness-- artless motion -- movement of crimson I have waited for this storm greeted it knowing the moon would never settle for pure white I have sought for years to remember the tender notes or how air would fill the sky with amber hues or the smudge of fingerprints on hollow gray =========================== the jazz of rain...the soul of your words... you are a soul poet L-girl. I have waited for this storm greeted it knowing the moon would never settle for pure white yeeessssss ... exactly and oh how I needed to read your words.   I would love to live as a river flows, carried by the surprise of its own unfolding. |
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Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
Beautiful Lauren...hauntingly beautiful! Heart hugs pretty lady~ ~Somewhere in my heart I'm always |
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LeeJ Member Patricius
since 2003-06-19
Posts 13296 |
Lauren, this describes so emotionally, so bittersweet those times in life that make the waiting worthwhile, when that certain someone comes along who is not affraid of your love...and he will, I promise. Hugs |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Greeneyes You whisper the sounds of the dove. |
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Cpat Hair
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
bravo dear lady.. bravo... |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
 wow |
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Greeneyes
since 2000-09-09
Posts 9903In Your Poetic Mind |
Thank you all for the touching replies....I appreciate your time in reading and responding...  very kindly Lauren~ I've tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone though you're still with me |
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aujussy wolf
since 2003-08-09
Posts 1215Michigan |
the saying is in the paintings we only pause for each lesson learned ahh yess , beautiful use of words the paintings bit really grabbed me , keep in touch L , peace J |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
I've read this a few times already and shame on me for not commenting sooner. I keep getting lost in thought as I remember once, listening to the rain on a metal awning and thinking, "Coltrane..."  You are always a delight to read, but this one struck that chord of nodding-knowing in me. *snaps* lady  |
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Contabo Member
since 2001-11-21
Posts 159 |
It is always a delight to read you and this is no exception. I enjoyed. Contabo |
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JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
Enjoyed...James |
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Midnitesun
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647Gaia |
'the jazz of rain' understanding this, and loving that line |
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Broken Member
since 2000-03-12
Posts 271The woods |
Very poetic and moving write. I like it ~Broken~ "Base not your joy upon the deeds of others, for what is given can be taken away." Peter Steele [This message has been edited by Broken (08-01-2004 11:55 PM).] |
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Robert Joseph Member
since 2000-10-07
Posts 491South Carolina |
The colors are endless, in this soulful painting...passion is thriving in full tilt. Greatly enjoyed! Robert Joseph |
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Mark Bohannan Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-21
Posts 7269In the winds of Cherokee song |
I have waited for this storm greeted it knowing the moon would never settle for pure white I have sought for years to remember the tender notes or how air would fill the sky with amber hues or the smudge of fingerprints on hollow gray ................................. I always enjoy reading your works as they give us new boundaries for he writers playing field. Loved the read and the beauty you put in it as always |
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Mysteria
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328British Columbia, Canada |
DAMN! That was good! Hit a nerve with me, been there, and done that I guess as I too cannot remember, but know that a rose was him! {and I cannot remember what the color of roses mean 'he loves me no he loves me not'} Lauren, this poem was pure magic. |
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Dark Angel Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095 |
The final green-- we pick up the moments toss them aside for anything that will make us happy the saying is in the paintings we only pause for each lesson learned Wow! Love this. It's always such a pleasure to read you Lauren. Maree Well I see you doing, What I try to do for me, With the words from a poet, And a voice from a choir, And a melody, nothing else matters. ~Stevie Nicks |
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soul drifter Senior Member
since 2004-09-08
Posts 711Colorado |
It's a good thing I was sitting while reading this poem; I'm quite certain my knees would turn to butter and I would collapse, overwhelmed and blessed by the beauty of this piece...and only works of pure beauty and perfectly spoken emotion do that to me, i.e. the album Pet Sounds by the Beach Boys. This is just as memorable and lovely as that work of art. Enough overemotiong from me; I just gotta say: you are a truly incredible poet. Thanks. "Poets are all who love, who feel great truths, and tell them; and the truth of truths is love." --Philip James Bailey |
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