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Open Poetry #33
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Outside the Poker Room
| Open Poetry #33 |
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Outside the Poker Room |
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CMGrimm Senior Member
since 2000-02-14
Posts 685USA 
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i see him sitting outside the main floor on a small bench next to the escalators he hangs his head and covers his face with his hands he grips the front of his hair and pulls and looks up i can see the agony of defeat in his eyes i can see the despair and the anger and i can see the fear he looks around at all the people passing by and then stares again at his shoes then he stands walks to the escalators and makes his way up away from the floor and back to his family wondering all the while on that long lonely trip home how's he gonna tell her he lost the rent money again. |
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| © Copyright 2004 Christopher M. Grimm - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
A good write, CM. Honest portrayal of yet another addiction. Well done. |
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scorpio Member Ascendant
since 2002-10-02
Posts 5178right...there |
This is a gripping write. And a story that happens daily. Well done Chris. believe in what your heart feels... |
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
This aches...really, really aches. I could feel the pain right down to my own shoes. A very emotional read. My heart breaks for all those whose lives are torn apart by addiction. You truly captured the essence of this with your descriptive writing.  EA |
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Magnus
since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135South Carolina, USA |
This is so true...could be lottery tickets as well, or drug abuse/addiction...alcohol, any number of other things...Online betting, ad nauseum.... You penned it very well. Thanx for the reminder, hopefully someone will learn from these words and seek the help needed to overcome. For it is never, or very seldom ever done alone. |
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Jes Member
since 2003-10-21
Posts 422Denmark |
Hi Criss Nice work here, i love when poetry has the power to giev an imagination to the reader a picture of the scene, i saw this mann sitting on taht bench with his hands up against his head i even imagined he had a black leather jacket black trouses and an open dark shirt on. Good work here. Smile Jes Life is for me to be - but always with a smile ! |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
wow...this write hits hard... I know I would get addicted to the casino if I ever went and took it seriously. That's why I don't go. |
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Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
Hi Chris. Excellent write with vivid imagery. Unfortunately living in a city with a casino I see and hear of this sort of happening far too frequently. Well done poet sir! Hugs~ ~Somewhere in my heart I'm always |
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iliana Member Patricius
since 2003-12-05
Posts 13434USA |
Chris -- great writing, really kept me reading; I could almost hear his silent sceam! |
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Snow
since 2000-10-16
Posts 1170desert flower looking for rain |
ohhh chris... this made my heart feel so heavy..... well done!!! snow "Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless." |
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CMGrimm Senior Member
since 2000-02-14
Posts 685USA |
thanks everybody Never be a carbon copy of anybody...make your own impressions. - ANON. |
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dgvarner Member Elite
since 2000-05-13
Posts 3552High Springs, Florida |
I just love the way you tell a story... enjoyed! hugs, g "We of the craft are all crazy...all are more or less touched." Lord Byron |
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Marge Tindal
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
DG~ Thanking YOU for the bounty of this harvest of one of my favorites inkers~ Chris~ EXCELLENT penning, my friend~ *Huglets* ~*Marge*~ ~*The sound of a kiss is not as strong as that of a cannon, but it's echo endures much longer*~ |
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Artic Wind Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 8080Realm of Supernatural |
thank you for a this sharing good write ARCTIC WIND |
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