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Open Poetry #33
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Snow
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Senior Member
since 2000-10-16
Posts 1170
desert flower looking for rain

0 posted 2004-07-23 04:48 AM



    



until lily birthed-stars

if music suddenly
had no melody
and the forest
  empty of echoes
pulled and taunted
your lips, near

  so near the taste
of desert lingers within
your mouth

each of your hands, though bare
would close 'round canyon
and moon

paths through hungerskin
unmarked, untamed
un_tapped
dead

like a grey winter
broken, like the cracks in leaves
void of color

they beg, you
poet
  traveler
explorer ... strike
with your pen

give voice to this
mute, make love
to my heart

  so that i
may speak
the native language
of our tongues

and our naked kisses
hidden until lily birthed-stars
find music in the art
of us


©sdt'04

[This message has been edited by Snow (07-23-2004 07:40 AM).]

© Copyright 2004 Snow - All Rights Reserved
nakdthoughts
Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200
Between the Lines
1 posted 2004-07-23 07:35 AM


they beg, you
poet
  traveler
explorer ... strike
with your pen

give voice to this
mute, make love
to my heart

  so that i
may speak
the native language
of our tongues


lovely writing, snow
M

Susan
Member Ascendant
since 2004-03-27
Posts 5104
walking the surreal
2 posted 2004-07-23 10:41 AM


Beautifully penned.

  Susan

Happiness isn't something that happens to you, it's created from within you.  Joy is a state of mind.

jennirey
Member
since 2002-01-24
Posts 198
North Richland HillsTx
3 posted 2004-07-23 12:48 PM


Snow
You always awe me with your talent.

Jen

Snow
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Senior Member
since 2000-10-16
Posts 1170
desert flower looking for rain
4 posted 2004-07-23 02:56 PM


M, Susan, Jen....

thank you all so much!!!


snow

"Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless."
--Mother Teresa

muted
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2004-01-15
Posts 2949
Elapsing, Eclipsing, Evolving
5 posted 2004-07-23 03:36 PM


Snow,
beyond beautiful

JL
Member Ascendant
since 2004-04-01
Posts 6128
Texas, USA
6 posted 2004-07-23 04:08 PM


OH yeah!  This is sooooo delicious!
Good one.

JL

She said: ”You look cute in the dark.”


Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

7 posted 2004-07-23 04:11 PM


every single word of this is pure poetry...
( as is the title)
a stunning write...one I wish I had wrote...
lovely lovely poetess snow

I would love to live as a river flows, carried by the surprise of its own unfolding.

~Fluent~
John O'Donohue

iliana
Member Patricius
since 2003-12-05
Posts 13434
USA
8 posted 2004-07-23 04:13 PM


I am in total awe of this one, Snow.  Makes me think of the lovely star gazer lily with its lucious fragrance, aluring in the night, just waiting for you to write her.   .....jo
Snow
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Senior Member
since 2000-10-16
Posts 1170
desert flower looking for rain
9 posted 2004-07-23 05:54 PM


ahhh jo how you know my heart

muted, jl, janet marie... your comments all feel so good... thank you!!


snow

"Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless."
--Mother Teresa

EvocativeVerse2
Senior Member
since 2003-09-10
Posts 1279

10 posted 2004-07-23 07:58 PM


Hi Snow. I love this. Why? Well several reasons really. First the tempo to which this would be spoken is striking. Each word held on the tip of tongue before sweetly released. Yes...it makes love. Secondly te subject matter is ever so sweet. It begs to be read aloud. This is definitley a keeper. A wonderful poem titled perfectly. Bravo dearest friend. Back to the top it goes!

Remember, if you're not part of the future, you're history!

Enchantress
Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113
Canada eh.
11 posted 2004-07-23 09:59 PM


Beautiful Snow...my how I love your work.
Excellent..sending hugs.

~Somewhere in my heart I'm always
Dancing with you in the summer rain ~

CMGrimm
Senior Member
since 2000-02-14
Posts 685
USA
12 posted 2004-07-24 02:01 AM


again......

wow

Never be a carbon copy of anybody...make your own impressions.  - ANON.



CMGrimm
Senior Member
since 2000-02-14
Posts 685
USA
13 posted 2004-07-27 06:00 PM


sorry maam but i just had to come back to this one again....

love
it

chris

Never be a carbon copy of anybody...make your own impressions.  - ANON.



Mark Bohannan
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-21
Posts 7269
In the winds of Cherokee song
14 posted 2004-09-30 12:47 PM



Ahhhhhhhh ... the birth of the purest passion.  Taking in the beauty of what some are blind to, and writing the creation from ones self most inner being.  So loved this write and more than happy to bring it back up.  I was commenting to JM about how much I was enjoying your poetry since I came back and she directed me to this one.  Tis truely a poet's poem and one that will undoubtedly withstand the trials of time over and over.

******************

"each of your hands, though bare
would close 'round canyon
and moon

paths through hungerskin
unmarked, untamed
un_tapped
dead"
*************

PERFECTION!!!!
Should be published in my opinion


Midnitesun
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647
Gaia
15 posted 2004-09-30 01:00 PM


oh, lady Snow, this is stunningly beautiful, the write, and the presentation.
thanks for my new library treasure

Gentle Spirit
Member Patricius
since 2000-10-09
Posts 13989

16 posted 2004-09-30 02:21 PM


SPEECHLESS...this is outstanding....very outstanding...
Snow
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Senior Member
since 2000-10-16
Posts 1170
desert flower looking for rain
17 posted 2004-09-30 02:28 PM


i just don't know what to say to you all... a simple "thank you" does not nearly say enough.... but it's all i have at the moment. it's strange sometimes... how pieces pop back up at certain times.

this was written at a time when i thought i wouldn't be heard by a certain person... you know, one of those...

if you could say anything you wanted to  right now, no matter what... moments.


ahh how i ramble.

thank you all so much !!
sdt

Robert Joseph
Member
since 2000-10-07
Posts 491
South Carolina
18 posted 2004-09-30 06:13 PM


Time certainly hasn't hindered your way with the pen.

Lovely work, Snow.

Robert Joseph

soul drifter
Senior Member
since 2004-09-08
Posts 711
Colorado
19 posted 2004-09-30 06:23 PM


Brilliant, beautiful word painting. I gotta save this one...

I so envy your talents.. just wonderful!

"Poets are all who love, who feel great truths, and tell them; and the truth of truths is love." --Philip James Bailey

Snow
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Senior Member
since 2000-10-16
Posts 1170
desert flower looking for rain
20 posted 2004-09-30 07:35 PM


i'm touched you think so, robert.

soul drifter, thank you so much!!

sdt

hoot_owl_rn
Member Patricius
since 1999-07-05
Posts 10750
Glen Hope, PA USA
21 posted 2004-10-05 08:55 AM


I've not the chance to read much of your works, but the title caught my eye and the poem did not disappoint. Lovely writing, I'll be sure to read more
Dark Angel
Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095

22 posted 2004-10-05 05:29 PM


Oh the passion!

Absolutely Beautiful Snow.

keeping it.

cuz fate is not just whose cooking smells good
but which way the wind blows

~ani difranco~

Robert Frazier
Senior Member
since 2003-02-06
Posts 1014

23 posted 2004-10-05 05:43 PM


this poem feels sooo good...full of passion...like a wave carrying us away to a distant shore.

Rf

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