Open Poetry #33 |
Epilogue to Twain at River's End |
Cpat Hair
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
She only draws 12 in draft And dances on wake or wind Unlike the bigger ones I’ve ridden Lakes seem to go round in circles Pointless at times to swirl Without change in such sameness And I yearn for the river again With muddy banks and gravel Interspersed with live oak or cypress That reaches with spread fingers to seine the day And shadows from the edges of each passing No need to call twain here Last time I saw you That dress which gaped open across your chest Was doing its own swirling Eddies of wind off the evening sky Pushing it around your thighs While my eyes studied the frown on your face “Too long” you said and then added a "So" to the long as I turned to grab my bag from deck Some thing you said or did Reminded me I had slept in the river’s bed too long And began a journey of my own To end up here In 14 ft of glass almost as old as I And showing the wear as much Her own scars So, I watch the clouds this evening As the small waves push me in rock Reminding me of bed springs and us Wondering… Do you ever gaze out towards the river And think of me? Did you ever... without dread [This message has been edited by Cpat Hair (07-20-2004 12:23 PM).] |
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© Copyright 2004 Cpat Hair - All Rights Reserved | |||
1slick_lady Member Ascendant
since 2000-12-22
Posts 6088standing on a shadow's lace |
"And think of me? Did you ever... without dread" no one could ever see you with dread or regret |
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Nightshade
since 2001-08-31
Posts 13962just out of reach |
Excellent Cpat. Your writings simply amaze me. hugs, Chris Life itself is the most wonderful fairy tale. |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Do you ever gaze out towards the river And think of me? ~*~ when, in need of inspiration... always. |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Cpat, Good write, but loaded question. LOL |
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Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
" Do you ever gaze out towards the river And think of me? " Always Captain...always. |
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Tiersdin Member Elite
since 2000-11-17
Posts 2364east coast |
How could she not? beautifully written, Captain. ~tier |
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Susan Caldwell Member Rara Avis
since 2002-12-27
Posts 8348Florida |
Epilogue? I am of the mind today that nothing ever really ends...just keeps replaying to a different background... I prefer the mud of the river to the glass. "cast me gently into the morning, for the night has been unkind" |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
Oh, wow... that last line adds a powerful punch to an excellent write!!! |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
A perfect open ending... (you know how I love those) I read everything you offer up (and have been known to save a few) so I just scrawl my "I was here"...and whisper my applause. |
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Magnus
since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135South Carolina, USA |
Well done El Capitain....very well done. so much to be felt within this piece. You write moods and moments very well. |
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Susan Member Ascendant
since 2004-03-27
Posts 5104walking the surreal |
I felt this one running through my veins, caught in its current. Wonderful. Susan Happiness isn't something that happens to you, it's created from within you. Joy is a state of mind. |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
oh man............... *mothy puddles* you will already know how much I love this one....and why.... and know this too...I will be back when time allows......... I would love to live as a river flows, carried by the surprise of its own unfolding. |
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Greeneyes
since 2000-09-09
Posts 9903In Your Poetic Mind |
So, I watch the clouds this evening As the small waves push me in rock Reminding me of bed springs and us Wondering… Do you ever gaze out towards the river And think of me? ~~~~~ ... I've tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone though you're still with me |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
She only draws 12 in draft And dances on wake or wind Unlike the bigger ones I’ve ridden Lakes seem to go round in circles Pointless at times to swirl Without change in such sameness And I yearn for the river again With muddy banks and gravel Interspersed with live oak or cypress That reaches with spread fingers to seine the day And shadows from the edges of each passing ============================================ Like a bad rash..... I'm baaaaaack but then how could I not...you write of river banks and bends and the moth will be here... the above verse alone is poetic gold...and so..the moth must worship it properly. *S* you KNEW I was gonna do this, right? LOL I would love to live as a river flows, carried by the surprise of its own unfolding. ~Fluent~ John O'Donohue |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
I would love to live as a river flows, carried by the surprise of its own unfolding. |
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