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devinechild22
Senior Member

since 2002-08-28

Posts 571

0 posted 2004-09-19 02:17 AM

There must be something in my eye
Something
I cannot make out this view
Something
Destructs it's path of light to shine through
Something
It's so hard, I cannot tell
Something
It's your face...
And down my heart
F
E
L
L

ShiningWindHaze
Member

since 2004-09-06

Posts 138
California, United States

1 posted 2004-09-19 02:53 AM

It was a sweet style. It inspired me to try new things. Creative. It made me think of how life has unexpected turns and how we can easily become confused.

- Haze

Mon Cherie

Senior Member

since 2001-10-31

Posts 922
Land of Never-ending Summers

2 posted 2004-09-19 07:02 AM

There is something sad about this. It feels as though you are trying to make a break through, but there's this obstacle ahead of you. And, it's him......

_,,,^.^,,,_
Florence

devinechild22
Senior Member

since 2002-08-28

Posts 571

3 posted 2004-09-20 12:06 PM

Thanks for the commets. This one could be thought of in two ways... 1)You can't move on because this person (or their memory) keeps holding you back. and 2)A memory of this person is one that you love above all things and you're starting to forget this memory. This person's face grows more blurry each day... and when you realize that you're forgettig something you loved SO much it makes you go into this saddened depression.

*Allison*

~~~***~~~Come away with me, Wendy. Come away to Neverland~~~***~~~

*Alli4000*

Member Elite

since 2004-03-21

Posts 3188
The World of Poetry

4 posted 2004-09-20 12:31 PM

When I was reading this poem, I envisioned it the second way you mentioned. I can relate to this poem a lot, plus I liked the creative style you used at the end.

By the way, I like your name...I'm an Allison too...lol...

~Alli~

*:.AIM = Alli4000.:*
Don’t cry because it’s over, smile because it happened...

Susan
Member Ascendant

since 2004-03-27

Posts 5104
walking the surreal

5 posted 2004-09-20 12:40 PM

I too feel the poem speaks with the second explaination- how sad.

Susan

Happiness isn't something that happens to you, it's created from within you. Joy is a state of mind.

Marge Tindal

Member Empyrean

since 1999-11-06

Posts 42384
Florida's Foreverly Shores

6 posted 2004-09-20 09:35 AM

Allison~
Renewing the memories with a word-walk is a nice way to make sure you never forget~
*Huglets*
~*Marge*~

~*When the heart grieves over what it has lost,
the spirit rejoices over what it has left.
- Sufi epigram <))><

Email [email protected]

Earth Angel
Member Empyrean

since 2002-08-27

Posts 40215
Realms of Light

7 posted 2004-09-20 09:43 AM

And down my heart
F
E
L
L

I could feel my heart falling
as well with this creative and
effective ending!

Love & Light,
EA

skyshine

Member Elite

since 2002-02-07

Posts 3058
Beneath the northern stars

8 posted 2004-09-20 10:21 AM

Either way you take it, it's a sad and powerful poem. Well done, Allison!

~sky

So you go and make it happen
Do your best, just keep on laughing
It's all on you, there's always a brand new day. -Avril Lavigne

devinechild22
Senior Member

since 2002-08-28

Posts 571

9 posted 2004-09-22 10:25 PM

Thanks a lot for the replys guys! This one falls pretty closely to my heart. I'm glad you all liked it. And to Alli... power to the Allisons!!!! I spell mine Allie though... it used to be Ali but I changed it because it made no sense. LoL. Thanks a lot again guys.

*Allison*

~~~***~~~Come away with me, Wendy. Come away to Neverland~~~***~~~

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