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Open Poetry #33
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Reverent Poet Tones
| Open Poetry #33 |
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Reverent Poet Tones |
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Elan Member
since 2002-05-03
Posts 382State of Wide Eye |
Reverent Poet Tones It was a time ago, in butterfly spans, behind closed doors and leaf-filled pages that he drew poems upon her skin, as talk quilted love sounds quietly… while in introspection, he dissected her thoughts, layering sounds of a woman who would find herself if she should chance to take his beliefs and wear them as gossamer silk…for he saw in her things he would never have, and it was this one night, between nibbled cheese, sips of wine, and poetic tombs, he intoned words of love in hushed, deep voice from another poet’s pen, then scratched his own questions into the book, querying soul notes of, “Will you?” “Would you?” “This is how I see us.” “This is me, that is you, bare armed and skin toned, beneath my palm, but drawing away to follow who you need to be, and become…” In a time long since, when butterfly wings of love sounds sat among leafy pages, long since the cheese has aged, and the wine gone acidic, the book remains inscribed with two poets’ thoughts, for he knew she loved the sound of words nestled gently between two backs, for it was all he had left to give, before he let her fly away. |
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| © Copyright 2004 Elan - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Dark Stranger Member Patricius
since 2001-03-19
Posts 13631West Coast |
butterflies and dark winged birds what do they tell the trees when the dart between the leaves? romantica ms...lovely work |
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Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
"the book remains inscribed with two poets’ thoughts, for he knew she loved the sound of words nestled gently between two backs, for it was all he had left to give, before he let her fly away." Oh Elan..this is too beautiful for words.. ..and did she fly? But of course she did...she soared!  THIS is a keeper!!! ~Hugs and smiles through tears~ ~Autumn..the year's last, loveliest smile.~ |
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LeeJ Member Patricius
since 2003-06-19
Posts 13296 |
“This is me, that is you, bare armed and skin toned, beneath my palm, but drawing away to follow who you need to be, and become…” I liked this part especially, b/c it suggests that even though we are a society needing human contact, the willingness to allow someone to be who they are,is so important...control in wanting to change a person will eventually stagnate the relationship...this proves that you wish for this person to continue to go forward and prosper Brilliant write...very much enjoyed! |
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MGROVES
since 2004-02-01
Posts 3802california |
beautiful thanks |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Elan A lovely poem, enjoyed the read. |
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Alicat Member Elite
since 1999-05-23
Posts 4094Coastal Texas |
I do see the others' views, but I also see the allegory of death in this one. The narrator speaks of a time long before, i.e. youth, and the march of time. Aged cheese, acidic wine; the narrator speaks of things old: they have aged together. The final line speaks of him finally letting her go, having her trapped inside him for some time, long after she either passed from this earth, or passed from his view. The aged cheese/aged wine could also symbolize things not quite being what they seem, as well as stagnation and rot. One aspect contributing to this is his use of another's work to accomplish his aim, to get what he wants and what he thinks she needs. Very well written, Elan, with many interpretations.  Alicat  |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Elan The kleenex warning? ! IWIHWT!!!!! |
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kayjay Member Elite
since 2002-06-24
Posts 2015Oregon |
Why do stories of loves that were so beautiful, but now gone, touch us so deeply. This is beautiful. Alicat drew some interesting inferences. KJ Through rubble and trouble and dark of night |
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Midnitesun
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647Gaia |
A beautiful romantic write, Elan, with multiple interpretations possible...as is generally the case with love and life. |
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Startime55 Member Elite
since 2003-04-05
Posts 2148Alberta, Canada |
A masterpiece of words that touch the heart with the grace and depth of them...Beautifully written... |
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Magnus
since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135South Carolina, USA |
I read this at work today...it is so touching and beautifully written. Put tears in this man's eyes. Yeah, where were the hankies!"L>>>>???? |
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miscellanea Member Elite
since 2004-06-24
Posts 4060OH |
Elan, What can I say? A keeper... Beautifully written! miscellanea |
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