When Sorry Isn’t A Word Anymore

How to Join	Member's Area	Private Library	Search	Sanctuary		Login
Main Forums	Discussion	Tech Talk	Mature Content	Archives	A home without a wall, Our haven without ends, A circle we all call Our Family of Friends!

James_A_Fraser
Senior Member

since 2003-09-03

Posts 972
Out Making Anticlines

0 posted 2004-07-09 09:29 AM

Because there are times when "sorry" doesn't count as a word, and other sounds we make, like "thoughtless," "blundering" and "fool" have no meaning. I'm sorry to introduce my new form in such a way, but maybe two mismatched voices can say what one isn't adequate to do. I'm at your feet, lass...hoping for what I don't deserve.

      When Sorry Isn’t A Word Anymore
             (a poem in two voices)

When there’s no end            there is no word
     of the wish                  for sorrow then
       for no beginning             when no end begins
then there’s no word        remorse follows
        but sorry                remorseless
    and I know                 and sorry drains
there’s no such                  into vacuum
       soothing                empty and
not for this                     void of meaning
       there is only                    only
               unstatable           unstoppable
               emptiness             emptiness the
the naked                          bare
      exposure                     knowing
           of this wrong           I have wronged
to mourn a word                     and a will to
     to wish words dead               unhatch my
actions void                            egg of shame
   and know                           knowing
             sorry isn’t even         sorry isn’t even
             a word                     a word
             after this                  after this

Gentle Spirit
Member Patricius

since 2000-10-09

Posts 13989

1 posted 2004-07-09 09:31 AM

I agree sometimes sorry just isn't enough and the word is empty. Very well done.

suthern

Member Seraphic

since 1999-07-29

Posts 20723
Louisiana

2 posted 2004-07-09 09:39 AM

Such a powerful, poignant poem... Each voice vibrates with deepest sincerity... together they form a plead none could deny.

Sunshine

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-25

Posts 63354
Listening to every heart

3 posted 2004-07-09 09:44 AM

Very good, James...

to have spaced out the later lines
with more                     space inbetween...
like a                         stepping away
might have even                     created more
impact...                            nevertheless

Well done...

LeeJ
Member Patricius

since 2003-06-19

Posts 13296

4 posted 2004-07-09 09:46 AM

when you hurt someone you love and truly realize...the pain and guilt of that wrong...well, can be unbearable....there are no words that can right the wrong...hopefully with time, one can work on forgiving oneself...and then perhaps a new beginning will start to unfold, hopefully for both...with or without each other, I can tell you it is definately a constant work in progress.

Thank you Jamie, for sharing your heart...God willing...we can be as he, and forgive ourselves...and also those who have wronged us. This spoke to me in many ways...thanks a bunch.

Susan
Member Ascendant

since 2004-03-27

Posts 5104
walking the surreal

5 posted 2004-07-09 11:21 AM

This was a very interesting structure and I like it. The cry of the two voices blended well to make this carry great feeling. I find that when "sorry" no longer carries meaning, "forgive me" is always a good start.

Susan

Happiness isn't something that happens to you, it's created from within you. Joy is a state of mind.

Martie

Moderator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-09-21

Posts 28049
California

6 posted 2004-07-09 11:37 AM

Jamie

This is a very effective way to carry the poignant meaning behind the poem.

suthern

Member Seraphic

since 1999-07-29

Posts 20723
Louisiana

7 posted 2004-07-12 10:09 AM

I so often find myself lacking even one poetic voice... your two impress me mightily. *S*

Janet Marie
Member Laureate

since 2000-01-22

Posts 18554

8 posted 2004-07-12 11:08 AM

the naked
      exposure
           of this wrong
to mourn a word
     to wish words dead
actions void
   and know
             sorry isn’t even
             a word
             after this
================================

If words but could ... they would....

well done poet sir...
creative, clever write and format.

I would love to live as a river flows, carried by the surprise of its own unfolding.

~Fluent~
John O'Donohue

Kellsue
Member

since 2000-05-06

Posts 210
Waukesha, WI USA

9 posted 2004-07-12 11:40 AM

If only I could be as creative! I love the way this was done. Bravo!

Kelly

You can give without loving but you cannot love without giving
There is no danger of developing eye-strain from looking on the bright side of things

passing shadows
Member Empyrean

since 1999-08-26

Posts 45577
displaced

10 posted 2004-07-12 12:22 PM

fantastic presentation

Ludo
Junior Member

since 2004-01-29

Posts 23

11 posted 2004-07-12 06:21 PM

I love your poem, your presentation works perfectly, and the subject is one which I relate to immensely; I regularly question the need for a word like sorry, as it is indeed, in my opinion, pointless.

Enchantress
Member Empyrean

since 2001-08-14

Posts 35113
Canada eh.

12 posted 2004-07-12 06:23 PM

Excellent write..very much enjoyed.
Hugs~

~Somewhere in my heart I'm always
Dancing with you in the summer rain ~

	⇧ top of page ⇧
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.