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Dark Poetry #1
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I know you
| Dark Poetry #1 |
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I know you |
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patchoulipumpkin Member
since 2000-01-01
Posts 196Bermuda |
Hello. this was inspired by a Henry Rollins poem of the same name, i realize its long, but i think it reads fairly easily. Hope there is something... I know you You’re the guy who couldn’t sit still Chewed on pens till they exploded in his mouth Anxious Always was in his head Never wanting to come out Afraid he’d get lost You fit in You had a lot of friends You had it all But somehow you didn’t trust it You thought it would all disappear tomorrow You were afraid of the future You wanted to know what would happen You pretended a lot You made things worse off then they were You faked injuries Made up stories Pretended it was harder So you could be seen as suffering So people would feel sorry for you You craved attention You thrived on it It was never enough And you thought that was a bad thing When someone called your bluff You turned to ice Afraid of having to give it up Afraid of having to actually be real to yourself I know you You were alone a lot And uncomfortable with it You got a bit depressed But didn’t want to admit it Because it wasn’t fun You were afraid to deal with anything You didn’t want to deal with anything You wanted cake You wanted it all You had to be seen You had to be envied Loved Admired Adored It wasn’t enough to just be you You had to be more You had to be the best Only then you thought would you be great Only then would you have to stop trying You had panic attacks You got terrified You were scared of all kinds of things You kept thinking the worse case scenario for everything if it was out of your control You did it so that you could feel powerful, So that it would give you that sense of control You suggested things to yourself to make yourself scared Cause if you were scared than people would feel sorry for you You were an egg afraid to hatch I know you You didn’t want to hurt anybody You wanted everyone to like you You wanted to get along with everyone You were ashamed of yourself But you thought you were the greatest thing since Star Wars You thought you were strong, powerful You thought it wasn’t fair that you had to be yourself It wasn’t fair that you had to actually be somebody You wanted to be everybody Be everything I know you You got angry because you couldn’t be everything It was never enough People couldn’t see how you were suffering It wasn’t fair that they couldn’t So you started to starve yourself Then they would see Then they would know Wouldn’t they? Wouldn’t they know the pain you felt The doubt You were afraid You didn’t want to grow up And thought that was wrong Everything about you was wrong wasn’t it? Not slim enough You were too fat People wouldn’t like you You wouldn’t be center stage It was never good enough You needed people to love you To tell you how great you were Because you were Weren’t you? You thought you were a star Everytime you left the house You were on stage And everyone was an audience member Separate from you A potential critic You had to win over But when you couldn’t you got scared Even terrified What could you do? I know you You think you suffer uniquely You think what you are is more important than who you are You felt you had to be taken care of and refused to take care of yourself You tell yourself you don’t know why you are like this But you do don’t you? You do but don’t want to think you are actually like that You don’t want to actually face the fact that you might actually be a human being. You hate yourself so much that it physically hurts. You’ve vomited Felt dizzy From pressure You tell yourself its needed to be the star you are To be the great man who you think everyone sees you as. I know you It takes a lot of energy to be who you think you are You devote time to hurting yourself Making yourself hurt so you can get attention So you can be taken care of But nobody sees you anymore do they? People are tired of you Bored Upset Frustrated with you because you can’t face it And you want to tell them how scared you are But if you do, you think you will die Another panic attack You are afraid to breathe To relax Because you are afraid of what you are doing to yourself The fear is so strong You believe you can’t face it Because you can’t let people see you are vulnerable You think they will destroy you Take you down You are afraid of what people will say about you Not being good enough Being a weakling I know you You think I don’t know you But I do You’re the boy who dreamed of life so much He got scared of living it I know you You don’t want to forgive yourself You are afraid of other people’s criticisms Other people’s opinions And you tell yourself you are a victim because of it But really you know, like I do That you like it this way Because depending on other people to feel good Is easier You don’t have to do any work Do you? I know you You hate yourself When you really don’t Even though you do I know you You’re me And wish I could tell you how great you really were Besides all your hate and self-denial Tell you about your humour, your smile, how you make an impression But I have And It doesn’t work Because I know you [This message has been edited by patchoulipumpkin (edited 04-12-2000).] |
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| © Copyright 2000 patchoulipumpkin - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Broken Member
since 2000-03-12
Posts 271The woods |
Wow wow wow! This is one of the best poems I've read in this forum, and I really truly deeply mean that. It kept me hangin until the very end, while the emotions were building up inside of me. The tears kept coming in the end of the poem. I felt you were talking about me all the time. Thank you thank you thank you for sharing this with me, I really really really loved your poem and now I love you to. I could probably write pages about this, but I don't have enough time. I'll keep on reading your poems my friend, take care  Yours truly ~Broken~ |
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patchoulipumpkin Member
since 2000-01-01
Posts 196Bermuda |
Wow. Thank you. I'm glad there was something in it that you liked. If you haven't already, do check out Henry Rollins I know you, its really something to hear. Anyway, thank you broken for your nice words, i'll keep an eye out for your writing. |
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SEA 
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676with you |
P~(could you have picked a longer name  ) This was great, I'll have to check out Henry Rollins now, cause I have no idea who that is but I am courious!-SEA |
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Joel the wolf Senior Member
since 2000-04-06
Posts 1333Angels Camp |
Me to, and your right it was long, reminds me of my x, but I payed more attention to this than her. hahaha and yes it is good. Joel. |
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NamelessOne Member
since 2000-04-09
Posts 197Biloxi MS |
Oh what an ending...great poem ,i enjoyed it |
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dhuron Member
since 2000-03-19
Posts 476 |
Wow, I am speechless at this. Very rarely does this happen*LOL*. Superb, no above Superb work here. I agree with broken, one of the best works in here. Great Great Job!! Daniel The glory of friendship is not the outstretched hand, not the kindly smile, not the joy of companionship; it is the spiritual inspiration that comes to one when he discovers that someone believes in him and is willing to trust him with his friendship." --Ralph Waldo Emerson |
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