Open Poetry #32 |
Come Down Now |
Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
come down now to the asphalt where I saw you first that dark place on the hot night with grit at our backs and all that thirst we could make sparks with our skin then and rolling was easy when our bodies pulled elastic from the sky and sent it back again come down now to the asphalt where I saw you first take me there again buttered and fresh like holding hands let’s go back and just begin I want to make a new map that skips this horror like a dream where I can fly and land safely three years from tomorrow up up and over |
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© Copyright 2004 Martie Odell Ingebretsen - All Rights Reserved | |||
Goodknight Member Elite
since 2002-06-15
Posts 2386Ohio, USA |
sure says a lot Martie - when you face very difficult things it seems like re-doing it would be just fine - you write this with so much feeling and the images you evoke are so vivid - my heart and soul go out to you and Taylor - Paul |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
we could make sparks with our skin then and rolling was easy *** when our bodies pulled elastic from the sky *** and sent it back again come down now to the asphalt where I saw you first take me there again *** buttered and fresh like holding hands *** let’s go back and just begin ============================= no one personifies like you do girlie. smiling at you for those verses... hugging you for the heart-tug of the last verse. |
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ThisDiamond Member Rara Avis
since 2002-02-22
Posts 9353Michigan, USA |
Such faith relishes this plate... Relationships have tides and storms, and anchor us in strength. All Blessings, TD |
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iliana Member Patricius
since 2003-12-05
Posts 13434USA |
Great correlation.... made me think of a bungie (spelling?) jump, somehow. Oh, if it were all so easy. ....jo |
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Mysteria
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328British Columbia, Canada |
I am lost for words Martie |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
I wish I could jump three years backwards from yesterday |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
There are so many lines I like so much... then I literally get lost in the longing of the last verse... beautiful work!! |
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Ericc Member Elite
since 2003-01-31
Posts 4178 |
I agree...each line is perfect! Eric |
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Toerag Member Ascendant
since 1999-07-29
Posts 5622Ala bam a |
Now Martie...you do know my response to a good looking gal like yourself that says: "Come down now" don't ya?.... |
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Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
"come down now to the asphalt where I saw you first take me there again buttered and fresh like holding hands let’s go back and just begin" I can feel the ache Martie..to be able to skip forward a few years or go back to the beginning.... ~Heart Hugs dear lady~ Something tugs at me, I've no doubt of that. |
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Cpat Hair
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
:::: nodding:::: |
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Honeybunch Member Rara Avis
since 2001-12-29
Posts 7115South Africa |
Martie - it would really be wonderful if we could all make new maps. There must be a reason why we can't but that doesn't bring us the comfort we require now in these times. My thoughts are with you. |
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kayjay Member Elite
since 2002-06-24
Posts 2015Oregon |
To retravel a road is always a wish we make, wanting the power to change. We can't play hopscotch on the continuum of time. I wish we could. Your poem is heartfelt and beautiful, Martie, nothing more can be added. Ken Through rubble and trouble and dark of night |
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Dark Angel Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095 |
Oh Martie, this is ever beautiful..just like you m'friend. Maree The clouds never expect it when it rains, but the sea, changes colour, but the sea, does not change. |
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Greeneyes
since 2000-09-09
Posts 9903In Your Poetic Mind |
a true beauty..... There's a place I like to hide- |
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SimplyGold Senior Member
since 2002-07-10
Posts 1453 |
Thanks Martie, Very though provoking. It is so hard to turn back but, if we tread too carefully moving forward the excitment is gone. The pain keeps us aware and the pleasure keeps us awake. SG |
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Corinne Member Ascendant
since 1999-10-28
Posts 5167state of confusion |
if only we could redo those critical moments in time. this reminds me of that Elton John song: Come Down in Time. Corinne |
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LeeJ Member Patricius
since 2003-06-19
Posts 13296 |
I want to make a new map that skips this horror like a dream where I can fly and land safely three years from tomorrow up up and over We can make new maps Martie, and we will, each one of us, gets it sooner or later...it's not so hard when we figure out the word allowance.... Your incredibly poetic, I see you living your life so peacefully, come what may? Yes? Smiles and hugs, very much enjoyed. |
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Magnus
since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135South Carolina, USA |
Sending you two giant hugs...and a very well done for this piece of you that you have lain out before us.... |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
I believe... in will power and faith. I also believe in you. |
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Dr.Moose1 Member Elite
since 1999-09-05
Posts 3448Bewilderment , USA |
martie, "up up and over" Thanks for the lift! Doc |
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Kevo Member
since 2004-06-02
Posts 466Navarro County, Texas, USA |
Martie, Your words are always so touching, heartfelt, and profoundly important to all things held valuable. You're poems are such an inspiration. Your strong will and "elastic" spirit keeps bungie-ing you back to the top of your writer's form and hopefully in spirit as well. You write so poignantly that I as well as others are able to take other "hidden" messages from your work - aside from the obvious - and apply them to various areas of our existence. You are truly gifted in that you give a gift everytime you put words to paper. This treasure is no different. Simply wonderful, thought-provoking, and inspiring. You force us to look within at our relationships and question whether or not we would do it again. Ultimately, that type of introspection makes us better husbands, wives, mothers, fathers, etc. Thank you. Kevin |
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Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648 |
Beautifully expressed, Martie. (((HUGS))) |
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rwood Member Elite
since 2000-02-29
Posts 3793Tennessee |
Your verse always feels like valleys from home. I can't come close to the voice that you possess, but somehow we speak the same language. You write right into where I live. Love, Reg |
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EvocativeVerse2 Senior Member
since 2003-09-10
Posts 1279 |
Hello Martie! Long time no see. Oh yes my friend I snuck in for a peak at your work today. I am not disappointed I did. This is exquisite dear friend! I love it of course...but then that went without saying. This is borderline erotic...and that is always good! 8-) Thank-you for sharing your incredilbe gift. Your buddy - Kevin. Remember, if you're not part of the future, you're history! |
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Ratleader
since 2003-01-23
Posts 7026Visiting Earth on a Guest Pass |
Knowing the depth of this, the source...no answer is possible, except possibly this one: /pip/Forum88/HTML/000455.html ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸ ¸¸ºº> ~~~(¸¸ER¸¸ºº> |
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