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brian sites
Senior Member

since 2002-06-25

Posts 1475
usa

0 posted 2004-06-21 11:42 PM

.....and I remember the times
we would stand
so many floor-tiles apart

          each leaning on different stainless steel

and the air was heavy
with everything
  including words
words that writhed in pain
words that burst in sudden blooms
                             of joy

you and I were so different

smile

but we could both sling it
like artists

       you made me realize today
what I like about people

          not what can you do for me
but
         what can you

      say

                to me

as I get older
I learn more
that everyone
is a teacher

and I wish you had not
stopped getting older

but I wanted to thank you
         for showing me
     how to
fill the air
with

      soul

Sadelite
Member Elite

since 2003-10-11

Posts 2519

1 posted 2004-06-21 11:53 PM

brian,
This surely does have soul-he must be a good friend and teacher.
Sadelite

iliana
Member Patricius

since 2003-12-05

Posts 13434
USA

2 posted 2004-06-22 01:10 AM

You are so real! I much enjoyed your writing here and feel the impression this person left on you in some small way through your writing.

.....jo

passing shadows
Member Empyrean

since 1999-08-26

Posts 45577
displaced

3 posted 2004-06-22 04:05 AM

what a way to say thank you

nicely done

wranx
Member Elite

since 2002-06-07

Posts 3689
Moved from a shack to a barn

4 posted 2004-06-22 04:24 AM

Yessir, slingin' it like an artist.

Very cool little ditty, dude

GG
Member Elite

since 2002-12-03

Posts 3532
Lost in thought

5 posted 2004-06-22 04:31 AM

You write yourself in this...
and you write him in it, too.
An amazing lesson here, that everyone is a teacher.
Thank you for passing that wisdom on.
This is great poetry... with soul.

Always, Alyssa

Poems are made by fools like me,
But only God can make a tree.
Joyce kilmer

Kevo
Member

since 2004-06-02

Posts 466
Navarro County, Texas, USA

6 posted 2004-06-22 04:50 AM

Proof that even when you're not necessarily looking for it you're learning. That's how we get so damn wise with age. Of course, for some of us no matter how much we learn there is no cure for "CRS" disease. I suffer from that. I Cant Remember [edit]. At any rate, you picked a wonderful way to present a difficult topic. I am amazed at your prowess as a writer. You simply leave me in awe.

Kevin

[This message has been edited by muted (06-22-2004 05:52 AM).]

Dark Angel
Member Patricius

since 1999-08-04

Posts 10095

7 posted 2004-06-22 04:57 AM

but I wanted to thank you
         for showing me
     how to
fill the air
with

      soul

love it all Brian, but...especially the way you ended it

Maree.

p.s. I think I shall keep this.

The clouds never expect it when it rains, but the sea, changes colour, but the sea, does not change.
~Stevie Nicks~

serenity blaze
Member Empyrean

since 2000-02-02

Posts 27738

8 posted 2004-06-22 04:49 PM

Pardon me, viking, but your love of people is showing.

You are beautiful yanno.

alibaster
Member

since 2001-07-07

Posts 299
In my own private hell...(PA).

9 posted 2004-06-22 04:57 PM

...and they say a man can't be deep....
:P

"There is an alter ego which dwells within every soul."-alibaster

"If it doesn't bite, scratch, and make you bleed it isn't worth it"-alibaster

Susan
Member Ascendant

since 2004-03-27

Posts 5104
walking the surreal

10 posted 2004-06-22 08:33 PM

I really enjoyed the feel of this.

Susan

Happiness isn't something that happens to you, it's created from within you. Joy is a state of mind.

Ratleader

Member Rara Avis

since 2003-01-23

Posts 7026
Visiting Earth on a Guest Pass

11 posted 2004-06-23 10:58 AM

....you swing that Louisville Slugger with such a gentle touch.....beautiful stuff here!

~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸ ¸¸ºº> ~~~(¸¸ER¸¸ºº>
______________Ratleader______________

Mysteria

Member Laureate

since 2001-03-07

Posts 18328
British Columbia, Canada

12 posted 2004-06-24 01:48 AM

All I seem to be able to say is, "Ahhhhhh."

Cpat Hair

Member Patricius

since 2001-06-05

Posts 11793

13 posted 2004-06-24 09:52 AM

well said and done dude... always a pleasure to read..

Martie

Moderator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-09-21

Posts 28049
California

14 posted 2004-06-24 02:35 PM

brian

You write the way it should be. Wonderful!

Susan Caldwell
Member Rara Avis

since 2002-12-27

Posts 8348
Florida

15 posted 2004-06-24 02:44 PM

as I get older
I learn more
that everyone
is a teacher

"and I wish you had not
stopped getting older

but I wanted to thank you
         for showing me
     how to
fill the air
with

      soul"

Stunning, wonderful words.

"cast me gently into the morning, for the night has been unkind"
~Sarah McLachlan~

Sunshine

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-25

Posts 63354
Listening to every heart

16 posted 2004-06-26 05:10 PM

but we could both sling it
like artists

~*~

I had to stop and smile widely here...

Such a welcome read, Brian.

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