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Open Poetry #32
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muted
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Elapsing, Eclipsing, Evolving

0 posted 2004-05-21 02:45 PM



Soaking in the Resonance
(a muted/Sunshine duet)
```````````````````````

Moments ago
with a gazebo surrounding her;
in recitation
and practice
practice, then breathe,
timing each word, clocking sound,
prepare
prepare
in case of syllables lost,
to find the rhythm escaped
through the knotholes when
only the boards heard the rumble
of poetry in tremble
repeat
revisit
every pause between
nature's applause
as the planks bask
in the warming sun
soaking in the resonance
of voices
from across the expanse
residing in one soul...
as she begins
gifting to the wind
the tremor of hearts
from around
the world
a universal language,
in the echo
of verse.

© Copyright 2004 Dawn van Krieken-Smith - All Rights Reserved
LeeJ
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since 2003-06-19
Posts 13296

1 posted 2004-05-21 02:48 PM


ahhhh, how incredibly beautiful...how peaceful and yet like a one act play...feeling like I was really there...very much enjoyed.  You make the reader think and transport them to the place of your vision.  
Susan Caldwell
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since 2002-12-27
Posts 8348
Florida
2 posted 2004-05-21 03:50 PM




Holy crap!

That was very well done and I likie!!!

"cast me gently into the morning, for the night has been unkind"
~Sarah McLachlan~

Sadelite
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since 2003-10-11
Posts 2519

3 posted 2004-05-21 03:57 PM


Nice!!  Encore!
       Sadie

JL
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since 2004-04-01
Posts 6128
Texas, USA
4 posted 2004-05-21 04:36 PM


Such a visual I conjured up in my head as I read.  Very nice indeed!

JL


She said: ”You look cute in the dark.”


Enchantress
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since 2001-08-14
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Canada eh.
5 posted 2004-05-21 04:48 PM


Oh this is SO beautiful!!!

"a universal language,
in the echo
of verse."

Yes it most certainly is a universal language.
Brava! A standing ovation to two of Passions finest poets!
~Smiles & Hugs to you both~

Dark Angel
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since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095

6 posted 2004-05-21 05:15 PM


Absolutely WONDERFUL you two!

A great team indeed.

Maree

The clouds never expect it when it rains, but the sea, changes colour, but the sea, does not change.
~Stevie Nicks~

eor
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since 2002-09-26
Posts 959
blues & greys
7 posted 2004-05-21 05:29 PM


wow, i hope our duet comes anywhere close to this!  very nicely done

"So what befalls the flawless?
Look what I've built, it shines so beautifully now watch as it destroys me."

Martie
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8 posted 2004-05-21 05:30 PM


Wonderful!!!!!  
Margherita
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Eternity
9 posted 2004-05-21 07:06 PM


Such a flow of harmony, ladies!
Twin poets in action.
Much enjoyed!
Love to both, Margherita

Susan
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since 2004-03-27
Posts 5104
walking the surreal
10 posted 2004-05-21 07:42 PM


Again, to find a word that is adequate?  Beautiful and all that it means.

Smiles -- Susan


The whole of the Universe resides within each individual heart.

Magnus
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11 posted 2004-05-21 08:30 PM


Ladies,  this will very well express the
feel of the moment,  of the day,  the
accomplishment and the feeling left behind
with those who listen and "FEEL" the words.

Well done!!  TO not just one,  but both of
you for a fine accomplishment.

Sunshine
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Listening to every heart
12 posted 2004-05-22 07:46 AM


Dawn, thank you so much for this unique opportunity.  To share in a duet with another poet is to expand one's horizons.  I hope more poets will take the opportunity not only to duet with you, but to find a poet-partner here at Passions, and blend their thoughts and feelings.

It is a challenge, it is humbling, and it is wonderfully rewarding!  Thank you again!

garysgirl
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13 posted 2004-05-22 07:52 AM


So beautiful, from two poets that I admire
so much the work of. Just awesome, you two.
Hugs to you both,

icebox
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since 2003-05-03
Posts 4383
in the shadows
14 posted 2004-05-22 09:56 AM


This is really really very good!

Thank you both for braiding this for us.

serenity blaze
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Posts 27738

15 posted 2004-05-22 05:11 PM


I knew this would be good.

With the two of you, it simply couldn't miss.

Wonderful work, ladies!

muted
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16 posted 2004-05-22 08:17 PM


your replies have been so lovely, sunshine is a wonderful person and writer...im humbled
as well, but exhilirated at the same time!

i would like to see more duets too!

iliana
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since 2003-12-05
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17 posted 2004-05-23 03:37 AM


muted & Sunshine -- To use a phrase of my son's, "this one rocks!"   ....jo
passing shadows
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displaced
18 posted 2004-05-23 05:01 AM


you two make a great team!
NewEnglandlazurlu
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A Mountain Paradise
19 posted 2004-05-23 08:40 AM


Ladies this is outstanding! You do well together and I hope you'll do more in the future.

Hugs to you both, Marti

If you truly love Nature, you will find
beauty everywhere.
 ~Vincent Van Gogh ~

Sunshine
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20 posted 2004-05-23 08:46 AM


I hope Dawn and I can do this again, too, Marti...thank you all for your lovely comments.  THEY rock!  
suthern
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21 posted 2004-05-24 12:43 PM


soaking in the resonance
of voices
from across the expanse
residing in one soul...

When two beautiful voices lift together, the melody is magic... Wonderful work!

Sunshine
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Listening to every heart
22 posted 2004-05-24 02:58 PM


Suthern, what is uniquely wonderful about a duet, is that the reader rarely knows [but some are good guessers] as to who wrote what.  I will tell you that what you picked out incorporates two of muted's lines, and two of mine.

Good job!

muted
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23 posted 2004-05-24 03:05 PM


i thought we melded well together
im so glad, it worked out so beautifully


TerryW
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since 2000-03-23
Posts 779
Louisville, Mississippi, USA
24 posted 2004-05-24 03:07 PM


Beautiful!  Such words warm my heart!

~you reached inside, you touched my heart,
and I am all the better for it~
Terry A. Woodson, Jr.

ThisDiamond
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since 2002-02-22
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Michigan, USA
25 posted 2004-05-25 01:15 PM


I could not have wished for a finer blend, and what a magical blossom you grew here.
Wonderful

TD

Gentle Spirit
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26 posted 2004-05-27 11:47 AM


I would love to see more duets also.  Combining talents is such a wonderful thing to behold.
ummm ....ladies, can I just say one thing?
MORE PLEASE

It's better than I could have planned..
it's made me who I am...
{Trace Adkins}

Sunshine
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27 posted 2004-05-27 10:24 PM


Only...if muted wants!

Because I know I will!

Sunshine
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28 posted 2004-06-07 12:10 PM


Muted, just wanted you to know, I gave a reading over the weekend [a request of the host and hostess] so I thought of this little duet again...and how rehearsing helps...

and of the sounds of the timber, that you heard.

Let's duet again soon, ok?

muted
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29 posted 2004-06-07 12:33 PM


oh my! I would LOVE that!
thank you so much for making me feel "duet-able" LOL

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