Jabberwocky (my version anyway)

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Pilgrimage
Member Elite

since 2001-12-04

Posts 3945
Texas, USA

0 posted 2004-01-31 01:29 PM

Jabberwocky

When little Alice came to tea
in gardens trimmed with violets,
she held the cup right daintily,
a dormouse nestled in her dress,
the hatter nibbling watercress,
and darling Alice winked at me.

You doctors push sobriety
and try to catch me in your nets
of gray-tinged dull reality.
The red queen screams while you assess,
but I’m safe in my idyll-ness
with little Alice on my knee

until it falls, that ebon eve
when Cheshire smiles pass out regrets
and hookah-smoking insects leave
us to the whiffling in the grass,
the burbled hiss, the stinky breath,
the sharp-fanged memories we flee.

It’s then white rabbits dream of geese,
of smooth green lawns and croquet sets,
but those of us who wake can see
the jabberwock, by moonlight less
a dragon than a priest to bless
us with this one last chance to be.

Nan (Pilgrim variety)

Andrew Scott
Member Elite

since 1999-06-24

Posts 2558
Redlands,CA,USA

1 posted 2004-01-31 01:43 PM

I LIKE IT! I do, I do, I do. Especailly that second stanza. I raise my tea in toast to the, with just a hint of sanity.

Mistletoe Angel

Member Empyrean

since 2000-12-17

Posts 32816
Portland, Oregon

2 posted 2004-01-31 03:13 PM

(smiles) Meanwhile the Mad Hatter is consorting for the Red Queen and under his hat there's so much anarchy the Tulgey Wood is sleeping! (big angel hugs) This is so novel, sweet friend, I was wondering by the title how you'd approach it, yay, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Nancy, thank you for sharing!

May love and light always shine upon you!

Love
Noah Eaton

"You'll find something that's enough to keep you
But if the bright lights don't receive you
You should turn yourself around and come back home" MB20

Marsha

Member Rara Avis

since 2000-07-10

Posts 7423
Maidstone Kent England

3 posted 2004-01-31 03:28 PM

Nan darling one, I’m here I read and Oh what a delight it is, how often your words spin a world of wonder and delight. That you have managed to out Jabbawocky the original is just a sample of how great you are.

Love this darling heart it is excellent writing and as always you shine like the star you are

Love you always
and forever
Mushy

Tomorrow is another day I don't know what it holds
but I can face the future with courage brave and bold

Footprints In My Heart
Kethry

Kethry
Member Rara Avis

since 2000-07-29

Posts 9082
Victoria Australia

4 posted 2004-01-31 03:30 PM

and Jabberwock is moretimes soft
to hold the passing of the days
where dreams are kept and held aloft
and grief is stored in distant bays
sometimes the day has need of craze
to keep the home inact to croft

Nan, to say I loved this would be an understatement. To say I am jealous of your talent would be a mockery so I will just say imitation is the sincerest form of flattery.

Here in the midst of my lonely abyss, a single joy I find...your presence in my mind. Unknown

muted

Member Elite

since 2004-01-15

Posts 2949
Elapsing, Eclipsing, Evolving

5 posted 2004-01-31 05:32 PM

fantastic!....lovely wonderful...

..id like to put this in my library!

Marge Tindal

Member Empyrean

since 1999-11-06

Posts 42384
Florida's Foreverly Shores

6 posted 2004-01-31 06:16 PM

Nan~
Oh my ... I LOVE IT !!!
Whant an incredible talent you are~
This is soooooooooooooo good~
*Huglets*
~*Marge*~

~*When the heart grieves over what it has lost,
the spirit rejoices over what it has left.
- Sufi epigram <))><

[email protected]

Magnus

Member Laureate

since 2001-10-10

Posts 14135
South Carolina, USA

7 posted 2004-01-31 06:28 PM

You have definitely outdone yourself with
this one. I loved every line of it. Thanx!

Pilgrimage
Member Elite

since 2001-12-04

Posts 3945
Texas, USA

8 posted 2004-01-31 07:22 PM

Andrew, I raise my glass to you. *I have ice in my tea, actually.

Noah, thank you so much. You are always there with a kind word.

Marsha, I'm glad you're here! I seldom have time anymore, but I love to come here when I can.

Keth, I love your take on the jabberwock!

muted, what a compliment you pay me. I'm so proud to go in your library.

Marge, hugs all over the place to you, girl.

Magnus, I'm so glad to hear from you. I'm pleased you like it.

Nan (Pilgrim variety)

Balladeer

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-05

Posts 25505
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA

9 posted 2004-01-31 11:16 PM

Your cleverness always makes me smile, Nan. There's a lot more to this poem than mere lines...love your talent.

wordwizard
Member

since 2003-09-08

Posts 483
on the way to next world

10 posted 2004-02-01 02:09 PM

a fresh resilient reminder of Alice and her tea companions...nice take on that

Grover
Senior Member

since 2004-01-27

Posts 1967
London, ON, Canada

11 posted 2004-02-01 02:11 PM

Delightful! Grover.

Pilgrimage
Member Elite

since 2001-12-04

Posts 3945
Texas, USA

12 posted 2004-02-01 09:17 PM

Thanks, 'deer. I've always loved Alice and her cronies.

Martin, it's good to hear from you. I'm glad you liked it.

Grover, it's so nice of you to stop by.

Nan (Pilgrim variety)

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