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| Teen Poetry #7 |
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stargal Senior Member
since 2006-03-06
Posts 1352OR USA |
It’s time that we talk Time that you listen Hear what I need you too Before you sit up and speak It’s not that I don’t listen to you Neither is it that I hate listening Just at times I feel you’ve got no clue What’s going on between us two You say you want to listen That you want to hear what I’ve got to say It just doesn’t seem true, to me, to you? I’m tired of feeling this negativity surrounding you You say I never answer when we interact That I ignore the questions that you ask Well, that could be true, but when I want to talk Have a serious discussion between the two of us You become the leader and I, the follower The speaker, one, and the audience…of one For once, won’t you let me be the speaker? Controller of the topic, initiator of the conversation I’m sure I sound selfish and I’ve never meant to be Yet, from my perspective, I’ve got a right to speak An urge to be stark with my words, to be free in my speech This things pushing me beyond my abilities I’m losing patience, kindness, and trust Denying the evidence of, my own, self-destruction The weight of my conscience is dragging me down Pushing me onto the very ground, affecting me in various ways I’m about to scream it out unto the world My freedom has been denied in obliviousness Cause the person that I love denies me a single gift The common courtesy of a friend… who listens |
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| © Copyright 2006 stargal - All Rights Reserved | |||
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bekahlekah45 Senior Member
since 2006-03-14
Posts 533 |
I really really like this! one of my favorites by you no doubt!! I’m sure I sound selfish and I’ve never meant to be Yet, from my perspective, I’ve got a right to speak Thats deff. my favorite part ever!!!! awesome job. i love the message it gives out. and just yeah i love it! |
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broken_smile1469 Member
since 2006-07-02
Posts 104 |
i like this one a lot. I can realate to it in a way... great poem! "in a world of cheerios, be a fruit loop" |
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stargal Senior Member
since 2006-03-06
Posts 1352OR USA |
Thanks, both of you, I appreciate that ya'll took a moment to post on my poem  @-->--- |
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cherrys_rule Member
since 2006-03-18
Posts 442 |
Yeah i understand, this has some of the same crap that I had in my poem. Not saying it's crap, maybe stuff is a better usage of the woud I'm trying to say. But other then that, your poem is much better then mine. But I guess that's just our opinions. but I love this one, and as you said before I can relate to your poem lol. |
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The Shadow in Blue Member
since 2006-05-18
Posts 493EL, Michigan |
I like the theme of this poem and relatibility factor. To me the last 3 stanzas stood out. Great job Stargal! ~J. |
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bekahlekah45 Senior Member
since 2006-03-14
Posts 533 |
"I’m about to scream it out unto the world My freedom has been denied in obliviousness Cause the person that I love denies me a single gift The common courtesy of a friend… who listens" I decided that i LOVE this last stanza also. I'm absolutely amazed at this poem. i can relate so well...and well it was just so well done. I felt the need to comment you again and remind you that i love this. great job! |
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stargal Senior Member
since 2006-03-06
Posts 1352OR USA |
Hey ya'll, Thanks fer posting! I love the people here at pip! lolz Bekah! Thanks again, but where's your poems?!?! I'm waiting to see whatcha got... I still need to write your poem, it's hard to find something good enough though! BTW - that's my favorite part(s) also. Great minds think alike? lolz @-->--- |
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buttercupbaby Member
since 2006-05-03
Posts 400outside in the rain |
hey stargal!! i really like this poem by you!! my favorite stanza is i’m sure I sound selfish and I’ve never meant to be Yet, from my perspective, I’ve got a right to speak An urge to be stark with my words, to be free in my speech This things pushing me beyond my abilities this is defiantly my favorite part of the poem, its so true. I feel like i hear you saying this...this seems so strong to me, im not sure why. well, i love your poems! thanks for sharing!!! -missy |
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bekahlekah45 Senior Member
since 2006-03-14
Posts 533 |
sorry stargal! i've been trying to write poems but im not sure what to write. i'm having writers block horribly. i was up till 4 this morning trying to think of stuff. not even kidding. AHH!!!! im tryin i'm tryin... |
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rhia_5779 Senior Member
since 2006-06-09
Posts 1334California |
i really like this!! It’s time that we talk Time that you listen Hear what I need you too Before you sit up and speak It’s not that I don’t listen to you Neither is it that I hate listening Just at times I feel you’ve got no clue What’s going on between us two those stanzas i felt really spoke out the feeling behind ur poem |
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hunnie_girl
since 2006-06-18
Posts 2567Canada |
wow i liked this poem it was good......it made a lot of sense too.....hope to read more soon... *hunnie* A true friend is someone who reaches for your hand and touches your |
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pencil&paper Member
since 2006-09-09
Posts 76asleep somewhere in my head |
i really liked this poem it really says alot my 2 favorite stanzas(not sure about spelling or even word lol)are: I’m sure I sound selfish and I’ve never meant to be Yet, from my perspective, I’ve got a right to speak An urge to be stark with my words, to be free in my speech This things pushing me beyond my abilities I’m about to scream it out unto the world My freedom has been denied in obliviousness Cause the person that I love denies me a single gift The common courtesy of a friend… who listens |
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surf_painter Member
since 2007-04-10
Posts 434Canada |
wow this was a very intense poem i liked it alot, your skills as a writer is amazing it is shown through your work |
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the_girl_next_door Senior Member
since 2006-02-26
Posts 591USA |
I loved this stargal. It's been forever since i've been on this site my computer has been down for about two months so i haven't had the net. i can relate. great job! heather Desire nothing except desirelessness. Hope for nothing except to rise above all hopes. |
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stargal Senior Member
since 2006-03-06
Posts 1352OR USA |
Thanks Heather! It's nice to see you around again, I hope to be able to read something YOU have written soon "The rising morning can't insure that we shall end the day; For death stands ready at the door to snatch our lives away" |
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Bahigano Junior Member
since 2008-05-13
Posts 31Nebraska |
I get where your coming from. i really enjoyed reading this from you. i hope to read more by you. always Lea |
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