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| Teen Poetry #7 |
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Again |
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brokenheart15 New Member
since 2005-12-16
Posts 5indiana |
where do i start where do i end i really dont want my heart broken again he wants me i want him too theres only one problem i dont know what to do i know he dont want me only for sex but i have trust issues cuz of my ex my heart has been smashed by a couple of men but i just dont want it to happen again [This message has been edited by brokenheart15 (04-24-2006 09:55 PM).] |
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| © Copyright 2006 Samantha - All Rights Reserved | |||
latteaddict213
since 2006-02-17
Posts 523Colorado |
Nice write Samantha. I was a little dissapointed with the ending. It didn't ryhme like all the other stanzas. If you title this something other than "untitled" more people might be interested in reading it. It is organized very well and flows even better. Jessica |
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stargal Senior Member
since 2006-03-06
Posts 1352OR USA |
Hey, Pretty much what Jessica said on this, the ending stanza just doesn't seem to work very well. Also there are places where your grammar are a little iffy, if you know what i mean. Other than that i like this, it has a great idea behind it all, and maybe also cause i'm feeling like this right now is why i like this so much. I can relate. Great write  Haven't seen very many of your posts, and i would like to see more, so i hope you continue posting on here! @-->--- |
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