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Teen Poetry #7
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Why
| Teen Poetry #7 |
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Why |
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Peach Junior Member
since 2002-11-17
Posts 33 |
A cat can die eight deaths and still get through another people can have a fight but still love eachother You can live through a plane crash and still take the next flight You can eat enough for two and still want the chocolate that's in sight A parent can be near death and still get up to help their kid somebody can come in last place and still be proud of how they did So why can't we get through that one bad day we had maybe it'd be better and I wouldn't be so sad I wonder why everything else can be fixed and be how it's suppose to be it's because nothing could ever hurt as bad as when you put an end to you and me If you don't stand for something, you'll fall for anything. |
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| © Copyright 2006 Megan Andrews - All Rights Reserved | |||
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the_girl_next_door Senior Member
since 2006-02-26
Posts 591USA |
I liked this poem a lot.. actually.. i think this is the first of yours that I've read.. it might be your first post maybe not.. but anyways. This was a great poem.. I loved how you compared all the things in the beginning and then had the ending come in and be like a question (why can't it be like that).. the only thing that I read a little difficult was the rythm of the last stanza.. the fist time i read it.. it was off beat but after i went back and read it slower it sounded ok.. maybe it's just be.. but either way. GREAT JOB! ~Heather Desire nothing except desirelessness. Hope for nothing except to rise above all hopes. |
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pullingxthextrigger Member
since 2006-05-01
Posts 133MA,..USA llx |
woah!!! this poem was very very very good!!! i loved it so much!!! awesome job! keep it up ~nora<3 your pulling the trigger, pulling the trigger all wrong </3 llx - P!ATD! |
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stargal Senior Member
since 2006-03-06
Posts 1352OR USA |
Hey peach, Very nice poem! I also liked how you compared all this stuff in the first stanzas before you put in the, “so why”, I must admit at first I’m like, “how in the world does this fit the title”, it was pretty coo that you could tie it all together so perfectly. The only thing that I found a little bit unsettling would be the rhythm, it was pretty good in most of the poem, but there are a few spots that it is a little stiff. I think it might help if you read the poem aloud to yourself and than fix what you think needs fixed… Good job on this, I can’t wait to see more of your posts  @-->--- |
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poise_and_rationality Junior Member
since 2006-05-06
Posts 46my mind |
yea i agree with stragal this poem is probaly one of your best keep up the good work  par x |
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poise_and_rationality Junior Member
since 2006-05-06
Posts 46my mind |
yea well done on this post it was realy good i enjoyed reading it ...... keep it up par house of composure where is your posture? |
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poise_and_rationality Junior Member
since 2006-05-06
Posts 46my mind |
well done on the post keep up the good work |
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stargal Senior Member
since 2006-03-06
Posts 1352OR USA |
uhh... poise? You're triple posting @-->--- |
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bekahlekah45 Senior Member
since 2006-03-14
Posts 533 |
okay i really liked this poem. a lot. nice job. and i hafta laugh because of stargals last comment. i just thought it was cute how she said..uhh poise, you're triple posting. I laughed. okay sorry. anyways i really really liked this |
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pullingxthextrigger Member
since 2006-05-01
Posts 133MA,..USA llx |
lol hahahahaha laughing's contagiuos!!! i think she triple posted because she loved the poem so much...hahahahaha that was hilarious!!!!! ~nora<3 your pulling the trigger, pulling the trigger all wrong llx - P!ATD! |
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Peach Junior Member
since 2002-11-17
Posts 33 |
Thanks for all the replies, I REALLY appreciate it, even the triple posts If you don't stand for something, you'll fall for anything. |
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