Let me fall. - pipTalk Forums

How to Join	Member's Area	Private Library	Search	Sanctuary		Login
Main Forums	Discussion	Tech Talk	Mature Content	Archives	A home without a wall, Our haven without ends, A circle we all call Our Family of Friends!

Xeonox

Senior Member

since 2000-04-01

Posts 1764
CA, USA

0 posted 2005-10-08 06:37 PM

It’s been so long that,
I don’t even know what I miss,
The last thing I want is to feel such pain,
That months cannot heal,

Tell me that I am not losing my mind,
That things will be better
After today I will think of it no more,
And will look at the future,
To find the one that is meant for me,

Forgetting that my heart was stolen once,
And broken twice.
To whom I turn to tell my tale?
Many of us have failed,

Baby, this love was not pure,
And you knew this from day one,
but then why did you lead me on?
took me under your wings,
and then watch me fall.

I speak insanity. I write fantasy. I sleep reality.

intention
Member

since 2005-11-13

Posts 59
New Delhi, INDIA

1 posted 2006-05-05 12:16 PM

i got it late i guess. was going through ur old posts... nice one

Love me for who i m

stargal
Senior Member

since 2006-03-06

Posts 1352
OR USA

2 posted 2006-05-05 08:43 PM

Well, even though this is kind of old, it's about time people started posting on it

Okay, my thoughts on this are that the ending leaves something to be desired, it's kind of cut short, leaves you hanging out there... Sure, it makes the title fit, but I think something more would be nice.

Even though, i didn't really like the ending, i do like the last stanza? it's kind of confusing, cause the stanza is good in this poem, it's like the last few lines are blah... To me at least, no offence of course.

I loved the first stanza though, mostly because it has this in it,

"It’s been so long that,
I don’t even know what I miss",

very nice lines, and even better at the beginning of the poem, because it kind of draws you into reading this...

So, even though I don't like the ending (I repeat myself a lot) I do like this poem, it's very unique, good write on this one

@-->---

the_girl_next_door
Senior Member

since 2006-02-26

Posts 591
USA

3 posted 2006-05-06 03:23 PM

"it's been so long
that I don't even know what I miss"

I loved this.. I loved these two lines.. This was a great piece I'm not sure why it's just now getting post... this was great.. It made me think about stuff.. (I think too much)

anywho.. great write.. one of my favorite by you..

~Heather

Desire nothing except desirelessness. Hope for nothing except to rise above all hopes.
Want nothing & you will have everything.

poise_and_rationality
Junior Member

since 2006-05-06

Posts 46
my mind

4 posted 2006-05-06 03:36 PM

wow amazing :clappping: well done one of your bests

	⇧ top of page ⇧
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.