Teen Poetry #7 |
Hating the way you love it. |
blackandwhitehorizon Member
since 2003-05-05
Posts 183an akward state of mind |
I don't exactly remember writing this, or who it's about. It sounds more like it's about myself than anyone else. I guess I'm not putting this up for critiques... I'm just kind of throwing it out there. You don't really have to say anything... If I can't see you Then you can't see me, And you'll never know what a kid I can be. With my eyes shut tight In hide and go seek I'm hiding from the world, And you're searching for me. Publicizing my grief Into your huge life. So untainted and nice. So perfect that you have to Steal my tears To replace some of your fake ones, Because you have nothing to cry about. You’re digging a hole of sympathy That they won’t jump in to Unless you’ve thrown a part of me In the bottom. Because there’s nothing there to push you. I hate your hopeful looks and grateful blessings. I hate your kind smiles. I hate your reassuring words. But mostly I hate the way that sometimes when you, so discreetly, steal my tears you replace them, just as silently, with your smile. |
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Lexy Senior Member
since 2003-01-28
Posts 1038California |
wonderful, especially reading it from the perspective of it being about you. sort of abstract, and definately unique. |
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aussie teen Member
since 2003-09-27
Posts 396Australia |
i like it... although abstract you have in a way projected something that can be understood by almost anyone...... either about them or about someone they know.... cheers for the read and hope to see more of your work soon Mel so this is me but what do you care about that???? |
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WinterWren Senior Member
since 2002-12-01
Posts 1044...Coming to |
Wow, this is really different. I love it so much!!! It's very expressive. Thanks for sharing, this one's going in my library. W.W. |
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peachesNcream Senior Member
since 2001-08-21
Posts 513Ocean Of Tears |
I love your work, it's ALWAYS good! Like your first reply, they said this was abstract. I think that's a good despriction for this one. Good work, as always! ~Jess "When the power of love overcomes the love of power the world will know peace." -Jimi Hendrix |
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fearing-laughter Senior Member
since 2001-04-24
Posts 605land of cheese (Wisconsin) |
weird but cool bergundy "Be who you want and do what you will, in the end those who matter won't mind, and those who mind won't matter." -Dr Suess- (a brilliant man) |
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sweet_cute_palestinian04 Member
since 2004-04-11
Posts 418Earth |
reallly cute,,lol,,,,strange though but i like it,,keeep it uppp Fate is what controls the world so just let it go and I PROMISE YOU WILL MAKE IT!!! |
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BabieDoll Member
since 2003-02-13
Posts 268BFE |
I'm SOOO glad I made the time to get back on here...you're work is completely AMAZING! ~J.Lynn There is not ONE person in this world that you cannot live without. |
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