navwin » Archives » Teen Poetry #7 » 5 am
Teen Poetry #7
Post A Reply Post New Topic 5 am Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
peachesNcream
Senior Member
since 2001-08-21
Posts 513
Ocean Of Tears

0 posted 2004-08-25 03:15 PM


I haven't posted or really written anything for that matter, writer's block I suppose. Tell me what ya think because I'm not even sure what I think about this one! Anything would be greatly appreciated!


5am

Early in the morning not aware of what is happening,
My phone is ringing with an obnoxious sound,
I answer to hear my favorite voice,
Only to know only conflict is to come.

The conflict came as it was bound to,
I remain at ease depsite the arguing,
Hours later I fall into a deep sleep,
I dream of you as always,
No matter I wake knowing that you are mine,
As I am yours.

My head is pounding,
Aching for an unknown reason,
I stand up and cringe due to the pain,
I smile and proceed with my day.

Later on the conflict will resolve,
You'll be at ease once again,
We'll be at ease,
Knowing the conflict was just another phase.

"When the power of love overcomes the love of power the world will know peace." -Jimi Hendrix

© Copyright 2004 Jessica Dodson - All Rights Reserved
SEA
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 Tours
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676
with you
1 posted 2004-08-25 06:02 PM


my only recomendation is that instead of
"Only to know only conflict is to come."

maybe...

Only to know conflict is to come

It would read smoother..

Spine Grinder
Senior Member
since 2000-10-28
Posts 1127
Standing In Silence...
2 posted 2004-08-27 10:21 AM


I agree with Sea about that one Jess, but other than that, I liked it. Good job.

"I tried so hard...But in the end...It doesn't even matter...."~Linkin Park

*Alli4000*
Deputy Moderator 10 Tours
Member Elite
since 2004-03-21
Posts 3188
The World of Poetry
3 posted 2004-12-25 06:39 PM


I agree with Sea's suggestion, but I really like this! Great write!
Merry Christmas!

~Alli~

Happy Holidays!

Post A Reply Post New Topic ⇧ top of page ⇧ Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.
navwin » Archives » Teen Poetry #7 » 5 am

Passions in Poetry | pipTalk Home Page | Main Poetry Forums | 100 Best Poems

How to Join | Member's Area / Help | Private Library | Search | Contact Us | Login
Discussion | Tech Talk | Archives | Sanctuary