Dark Poetry #4 |
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Faded |
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muted![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2004-01-15
Posts 2949Elapsing, Eclipsing, Evolving ![]() |
colder the r(p)ain falls against skin pressing me towards shelter needling the numb in place of finger’s warmth dissipating disintegrating memories I’ve forgotten now where the erosion has sacrificed metaphor instead of flesh tearing me one word at a time droplets of poetry bleeding me to silence washing over me swallowing my voice breathe your ink into me into me into the hollow reasoning of why I exist and of why muted needs lie begging at your feet. |
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© Copyright 2004 Dawn van Krieken-Smith - All Rights Reserved | |||
Xeonox![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2000-04-01
Posts 1764CA, USA |
You have an unique writing style. This poem potrays a silent ending. I speak insanity. I write fantasy. I sleep reality. |
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Dark Angel Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095 |
Wowser! Mxx The clouds never expect it when it rains, but the sea, changes colour, but the sea, does not change. |
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*Alli4000*![]()
since 2004-03-21
Posts 3188The World of Poetry |
Wow Dawn! I am speechless! ![]() ~Alli~ I always knew looking back on the tears would make me laugh, but I never knew looking back on the laughter would make me cry. |
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muted![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2004-01-15
Posts 2949Elapsing, Eclipsing, Evolving |
thanks you guys ![]() |
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Susan Member Ascendant
since 2004-03-27
Posts 5104walking the surreal |
excellent -- Susan Happiness isn't something that happens to you, it's created from within you. Joy is a state of mind. |
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~K~ Member
since 2004-07-27
Posts 148 |
Yea!!! I loved this for obvious reasons. It is great writing. ![]() |
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muted![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2004-01-15
Posts 2949Elapsing, Eclipsing, Evolving |
oh susan ![]() ~K~..well thank you ![]() ![]() |
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eor Senior Member
since 2002-09-26
Posts 959blues & greys |
i enjoyed this one dwan!! Beauty is truth, truth beauty |
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muted![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2004-01-15
Posts 2949Elapsing, Eclipsing, Evolving |
nice to see you here again ![]() |
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darkness_witch Senior Member
since 2003-12-03
Posts 516Underneath |
wow i am stunned. this is a truly asmazing poem. i love it for its uniqueness, yet raw emotion. amazing, definitly gunna look out for ur poems more often loveandempathy darkness nirvana means freedom from pain, suffering and the external world. |
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muted![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2004-01-15
Posts 2949Elapsing, Eclipsing, Evolving |
![]() glad you enjoyed ![]() |
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Hollow_Emptiness Senior Member
since 2004-02-01
Posts 715New Zealand |
The whole poem was all great, I can't pick out the lines I liked best, because...I like them all. I've read it a few times by now, and I'm replying to say...well, that I loved it, I guess. Hollow. "Why are my visions so unliving with dreams? And why do I no longer care?" - Stygian |
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PainBaneChaos Member
since 2003-10-17
Posts 150The point of no return |
*goes all teary* It's so beautiful! Seriously, though. Loved it, will keep an eye out for ya. |
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