»
Archives
»
Dark Poetry #4
»
i see now
| Dark Poetry #4 |
|
i see now |
|
|
Gothika_07 Member
since 2004-01-15
Posts 61new zealand |
i see your face in my mind so vivid and placid i see the chestnut blue staring shyly at the ground I see the slightest movement of your hand I see the the lick of your tongue slicing acoss rosy flesh I see the need deep in my breaking heart I see the unknowing in your own i see nothing through the tears every tear i drop is yours i see beauty so plainly if i can why can't you? and then i hear the screams racking in my brain i hear the pounding pumping pulling hideous pain i hear your voice confident a soft i wish you cud feel wot i feel or express it to me i hear i see i know |
||
| © Copyright 2004 Gothika_07 - All Rights Reserved | |||
|
darkness_witch Senior Member
since 2003-12-03
Posts 516Underneath |
this is pretty good. in sorta thort the chestnut blue was great in the other one but this time it just kinda seemed like it was replayed in a poor situation. ummmmm it sorta had no flow ot it. maybe if u explain it it wod make more sense to me and ill read it again and see wat i think.. it had real good imagery definitly. keep rockin n rollin butiful. darkness no one gives a s**t, as long as you smile. |
||
|
kissa~rachelle Senior Member
since 2003-11-27
Posts 988nowhere special |
kool. I liked it. I'm adding it 2 my library. ~Vampire Kisses  I want a relationship i can finally sink my teeth into.~ Alexander Sterling |
||
|
|
⇧ top of page ⇧ |
|
| All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. | ||
