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Paper Tiger
Member

since 2003-09-28

Posts 77

0 posted 2004-02-18 03:19 PM

Broken, paralyzed, wasted—you could've mended me,
But what? You were too occupied with yourself to ever give a damn?
Yes! You were strong: strong enough to save me,
And held within yourself the power to lift me from the dark.
I lay here wondering where you've been all this time.
The light has all but vanished from my life,
And neither your warmth nor your presence is any longer felt.
When I needed you most—you were off,
And even now I need you—you aren't here.
Through it all, where were you?

P.S. If you would like to read the original (explicit) version, email me at [email protected]

Ringo

Member Elite

since 2003-02-20

Posts 3684
Saluting with misty eyes

1 posted 2004-02-18 06:13 PM

Welcome to Passions!!!!!!
This ios a really good write. I look forward to reading more.

But now the animal is in pain...
And now it's starting to rain...
But I'm still the same.

darkness_witch
Senior Member

since 2003-12-03

Posts 516
Underneath

2 posted 2004-02-18 10:12 PM

hey there!
i really love this. so many people i am sure can realate to this, i know i can, yet you tackle the subject so honestly and yet brutally.

hope that makes sense, it doesnt to me.

post some more, i cant wait to read them!!!

keep rockin

darkness

You can always hear a tear in Cobain's voice, the pain going on there is always visible through his lyrics - Marilon Manson

silhouetted
Senior Member

since 2004-01-30

Posts 537
New Zealand

3 posted 2004-02-19 12:02 PM

niiice

i actually didnt no it was ur first post
i read it and was extremly impressed, thinking it was just another regular.

but wen i looked back i saw the 'first post' sign flashing and went to look agen

i was shocked to see it was this one

Great writing

i agree with darkness

LOR

"They'll love you just the way you are, if your perfect" - Alanis Morisette

Vagabond
Member

since 2004-01-23

Posts 163

4 posted 2004-02-19 08:13 AM

i Really liked it to and sent you and e-mail for the full version. My first poem here First Stab was deleted because its contint. So my first turned up in philosiphy, Oh well send me yours i'll send you mine.(i can't type this mornin')

Vagabon the Lost One

Paper Tiger
Member

since 2003-09-28

Posts 77

5 posted 2004-02-20 03:41 PM

I appreciate all the replies, but I'm still not really satisfied with this one. I wrote it in the matter of five to ten minutes.

kissa~rachelle
Senior Member

since 2003-11-27

Posts 988
nowhere special

6 posted 2004-02-21 09:08 PM

I would like to hear the explicit version. I will email you my address thing. I like this.
~Vapmire Kisses

I want a relationship i can finally sink my teeth into.~ Alexander Sterling

passing shadows
Member Empyrean

since 1999-08-26

Posts 45577
displaced

7 posted 2004-02-23 03:19 AM

I could have written this...I can relate well

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