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Dark Poetry #4
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Lisey
Junior Member
since 2006-08-27
Posts 36
UK (Wales)

0 posted 2006-08-28 04:25 AM


Me, Myself And I

you dry your eyes but your still crying
you dream a dream,your a bird flying
you sit on your own,but you've got a friend
a familiar face a ear to bend
you control thier thoughts
yet you disagree
in the right state of mind
you try to flee,
you try to escape
but thier always there
in that hole in the wall
or hidden under the stair
you take your pills
its ok for a while
living free
in your minds exile.
then time draws on
"I'm better now doc"
700 pills later
in that chair you rock
Hey lil buddy,
why did you run away from me?
I saw you hiding behind that tree
I'm not your enemy
im telling you true
im just a reflection
of the naughtier you!
I know you didnt mean to do it
I told you too
but yet i only told you one
but you decided to kill two
your beyond my help
Im only trying to cheer you up,
hey take your pills
the ones in that plastic cup
but they wont rid you of me
I'll hide for a while
sitting here waiting
with my evil smile
you see im you the one you want to be
just waiting here
til we go on our killing spree!!


Written By Lisey

© Copyright 2006 Lisa - All Rights Reserved
lanaia74
Member
since 2006-08-25
Posts 67

1 posted 2006-08-28 07:14 AM


That last line hit me like a brick wall! Well done!
burntsiena
Junior Member
since 2006-08-10
Posts 34
Rhode Island
2 posted 2006-08-28 01:22 PM


as I was reading, I forgot the title and then I looked back and said, hmmmm... i like the reference to dependence on pills - having been forced to take pharmaceuticals from doctors to supposedly make me better - I also enjoy the rhyming
Lisey
Junior Member
since 2006-08-27
Posts 36
UK (Wales)
3 posted 2006-08-28 01:36 PM


Hey thanks! i only really write poetry that rhymes!its the rhyming that brings it out of me!!....i wrote this late one night after watching a documentry!! its one of my favourites!
ThisDiamond
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-02-22
Posts 9353
Michigan, USA
4 posted 2006-08-28 11:34 PM


Welcome to Passions,

Very clever theme in your poem.  It flowed really well.

Such a great effect, the layering of medicating, intoxicating...the alter ego, mental illness.  Good job here.
TD

UseTheIllusion
Member
since 2006-02-06
Posts 223
In a state of limbo
5 posted 2006-08-29 05:15 PM


You managed to capture madness very well.  Being mad myself, I would know
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