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Magic Solias
Member

since 2003-11-08

Posts 73
California, USA

0 posted 2003-11-08 06:02 PM

PINK GREAT MIRROR FOG

And I took a
walk that night
when it was
still bright
with another
great man
to see the
mountains of
nearby
Sierra Nevada
in sunset-mirror
light, later
obscured by darkness
in a pink cloud
fog.

Magic Solias

"we dream to love and love to dream"

Margherita
Member Seraphic

since 2003-02-08

Posts 22236
Eternity

1 posted 2003-11-08 06:21 PM

A beautiful moment to capture and to cherish, as you do.
Lovely write.
Love, Margherita

passing shadows
Member Empyrean

since 1999-08-26

Posts 45577
displaced

2 posted 2003-11-09 01:31 AM

and you didn't take a picture? darn!

Magicmystery
Senior Member

since 2002-02-13

Posts 821
Windsor, Ontario, Canada

3 posted 2003-11-09 02:03 AM

I first want to say that I liked how you described the sunset.... in reflection.

I am finding it difficult to follow your thought process when the lines I am reading are only two or three words long. If I may make a suggestion, center your poem and make the lines longer... toward full sentences.... not leaning against a wall so lean and tall. I have read all your poems in here and I find that I might be losing something to the translation because of the way you have formatted them. I read them twice just to make sure I "get it". I know you hardly edit your poems,and you are probably writing as you post but it would only take you a couple extra seconds to click the center button and a few more to make the lines a readable length.... no punctuation necessary. And trust me... the "raw intensity" will still be there for us to see. Your poems just won't be as long line wise... maybe a good thing.... not everyone in here writes long, well structured, ...fact is, a good many of our poets write some very descriptive, well centered prose (that we call "freestyle")that we all enjoy reading... Try a Hyku or a Senryu... it will give you practice with words and structure.
Looking forward to reading more of your work,

Sherry

[This message has been edited by Magicmystery (11-09-2003 02:04 AM).]

Mistletoe Angel

Member Empyrean

since 2000-12-17

Posts 32816
Portland, Oregon

4 posted 2003-11-09 03:18 PM

(smiles) Oh Magic, this is beautiful imagery, sweet friend, I too love those warm, vibrant sunrises and sunsets, they truly bring electricity and magic to the horizon! (big hugggsssssss) God Bless You, sweet friend, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Magic, thank you for sharing!

May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

I don't need no proof when it comes to God and truth
I can see the sun set and I perceive

***Live***

SharaRose
Member Elite

since 2003-07-19

Posts 2501
Somewhere out there~

5 posted 2003-11-09 03:25 PM

So pretty the skies are right now. I am reading yet another one about those pink skies. WOW.. how beautiful is that!!! Thanks for sharing the beauty in imagery thought.

Love,
Terri~

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