Open Poetry #28 |
Meshed Lives [Cpat Hair’s “Screen Wire” challenge] |
Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Meshed Lives [Cpat Hair’s “Screen Wire” challenge] Sounds and smells carry through and LA traffic wasn’t near back then, like it is now when kids could roam on city blocks but home was just over there, pink stucco, Spanish style, low-slung against California blue skies always green trees never fading, when people only wore sunglasses for glare, not stare, purposes and out there, in the distance, mountain ranges waved at the sea’s foam just a little west of their foothills the screen door clattered shut when Tommy came to show us how to make bees dizzy, my little brother all boy-amazed at the bigger kid’s ability to slow a bee. Tommy had an old soup can, and his all-in-one pocket knife with that little lid remover, like magic, pried off the other end of that soup can. Then Tommy produced, from some where, two small pieces of screen mesh to hold against both ends, while he went bee hunting, and brother tagged along. I sat in the sandbox, magicking up my own girl things while just over there, by beanpole hollyhocks two tow-heads were bent in abject fascination, now that one lone bee had become The Victim. Curiosity, born early, tiptoed me over, and they, unaware that I stood behind them. I watched as Tommy produced a dark green piece of glass, while an overhead sun beat down on us, oblivious, we were, to things like sunscreens and time. Making promises to my little brother that oh yes, he, too, could pick up the dizzy bee, safe enough in a few minutes, while the green glass did its harm. When Bee appeared to stumble, never mind he is dying, seemingly, to a young heart simply to be slowing down leave it alone, Robert I thought I heard me say that, leave it alone, Robert as he reached for the bee on Tommy’s say so what does a girl know, especially a sister so the swift sting stung sincerely, seriously, my scream beating a footpath to the screen door, then melting through it, while hands made imprints as they met mesh to push my way in on a door that opened outward Daddy!!! Daddy!!! Salt stings, too, when you hear a brother shriek in surprised pain, and wasn’t it my fault that I let him pick up the maddened bee, knowing now that Tommy knew, too, a trick to pull on someone younger than even me, as Daddy came rushing out, picking up Robert, demanding Tommy, Leave Now! then whisking my brother inside to remove stinger, and sting, to calm the wildness still hanging in the air, to leave me wiping my eyes with mesh imprinted hands which smelled of metal, dust and guilt. |
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© Copyright 2003 Karilea Rilling Jungel - All Rights Reserved | |||
Cpat Hair
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
well met... and the use of screen in several contexts a nice addition... Bravo!!! |
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angelblueyes Member Elite
since 2003-07-19
Posts 2148Oklahoma |
WOW!!! I think you've met this challenge with full force.You never cease to amaze me. Crystal |
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Dark Angel Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095 |
you've definitely met this challenge Sunshinygirl. Fantastic writing. Maree fate is not just |
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Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
Challenge very well met! Much enjoyed. ~Smiles & Hugs, Nancy~ ~ Summer can't be over... |
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Krawdad Member Elite
since 2001-01-03
Posts 2597 |
(dang older brothers!) Another screen I hadn't thought of. More ideas . . . Enjoy story poems like this. |
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Patricia Member Elite
since 2003-04-06
Posts 2160Missouri |
Karilea...an impressive write! By the way, as the oldest of three, I know that guilt! Patricia |
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Endlessecho Member
since 2003-09-05
Posts 398I live within myself |
Wow! I aspire to tell a story as well as you. Another beautiful peice of memory. Thank you! |
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Ratleader
since 2003-01-23
Posts 7026Visiting Earth on a Guest Pass |
Woo -- when you pick up a challenge, you throw it a mighty long distance! Turned this one into art, you did. ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸ ¸¸ºº> ~~~(¸¸ER¸¸ºº> |
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