Open Poetry #28 |
homing |
Wind
since 2002-10-12
Posts 2981 |
Whirlwinds and skyscrapers senseless thoughts and endless seas I wish that I could wake from this ugly dream I wish I could rest my head to sleep forever and shut out all the angry screams hollow boned and empty-brained dead ends and one way streets Smog to save me from the light, ultraviolet touch and wishing that you knew There would be fire but knowledge put it out. Feathers and fur to shelter me from winds and angry eyes, stones and ammunition Memory is a senseless thought but I still find a way. I work my way back home to the place I was born songs to sing me to sleep without mournful lullabyes City streets and crowded roads, nameless faces and faceless names The city is underwater, somewhere where I cannot breathe Broken windows and boarded doors, alley cats and superstitions save the birds and bring me home insanity is not a crime [This message has been edited by Wind (09-06-2003 07:36 PM).] |
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© Copyright 2003 Liz - All Rights Reserved | |||
gemjop Member Elite
since 2002-11-18
Posts 2587Pencilveinia, USA |
Smog to save me from the light, ultraviolet touch and wishing that you knew There would be fire but knowledge put it out. You rule. The title, the theme, the thoughts, the presentation. I had to quote that bit though, it was my favourite: there would be fire, but knowledge to put it out. Thankyou for posting, you've made my night Instant karma's gonna get you. |
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Wind
since 2002-10-12
Posts 2981 |
and you made mine, lets say we're even insanity is not a crime |
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Kaoru
since 2003-06-07
Posts 3892where the wild flowers grow |
"City streets and crowded roads, nameless faces and faceless names The city is underwater, somewhere where I cannot breathe Broken windows and boarded doors, alley cats and superstitions save the birds and bring me home" Damn.. this is good. |
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Wind
since 2002-10-12
Posts 2981 |
thanks Meg, this one's from my journal, but I had to take out a few of my 'sentence inhancers' lol... so..yeah. I appriciate it insanity is not a crime |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Liz, I've said it before, I will say it again... you're a young girl in an old soul. Very well done! |
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Aenimal Member Rara Avis
since 2002-11-18
Posts 7350the ass-end of space |
I think too many times people focus on your age and i admit there had been times when i said wow and she's only __. But old young it doesnt matter, you're a brilliant writer regardless of age and one of PIP's best |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
brilliant! just an awesome piece here, love the last lines |
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vlraynes Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-25
Posts 8229Somewhere... out there... |
This is an excellent write, Liz...I love it! VERY well done. Hugs, ~Vicky If you judge people, you have no time to love them. --Mother Teresa [This message has been edited by vlraynes (09-07-2003 04:10 AM).] |
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
I do believe that you must have had more incarnations than there are grains of sand on the beaches of planet Earth! There is so much depth and wisdom to your poetry. This could only come from someone whose experience spanned a far greater number of years than you have lived in your young life. EA |
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Susan Caldwell Member Rara Avis
since 2002-12-27
Posts 8348Florida |
Suberb writing...and thoughts Susan |
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Wind
since 2002-10-12
Posts 2981 |
umm thanks sunshine... Raph- yeah..it feels like that a lot but thats what I l#ve about you..ya treat me like an equal and not a child that needs to have everything sugar coated. and plus guys, I'm almost 15, its not that young. PS- glad you liked that part Vicky- thank ya sweetie EA- thanks, I'm glad you think that. thank you too susan insanity is not a crime |
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bsquirrel
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855 |
Ah yes, the shrapnel in the sky. (don't ask me, I'm operating on little sleep ) |
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