Caught In The Downpour - pipTalk Forums

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1slick_lady
Member Ascendant

since 2000-12-22

Posts 6088
standing on a shadow's lace

0 posted 2003-08-28 12:29 PM

Caught In The Downpour

the rain knows your name
       I hear it as it cries
such a mournful missing pain
       pulled as no edge is denied
flooding walls of tears slam down
       doors opened now tightly close
thunderous aches here are found
       electrically across the air of woes
searching for where they once knew home
       clouds bleeding grey where was blue
sobbing thunder looses breath in sorrows moan
       in panic scrambling looking now for you
sadly I know just how clouds feel
       so lost within a sky felt rip
where pouring is the only thing real
       in the stinging fingers of lightning’s grip

angelblueyes
Member Elite

since 2003-07-19

Posts 2148
Oklahoma

1 posted 2003-08-28 12:31 PM

Such sadness, but in even in this sadness I sense your strength.You amaze me with your words.
Crystal

icebox
Member Elite

since 2003-05-03

Posts 4383
in the shadows

2 posted 2003-08-28 01:08 AM

Marvelous!

Thank you for sharing this.

Ratleader

Member Rara Avis

since 2003-01-23

Posts 7026
Visiting Earth on a Guest Pass

3 posted 2003-08-28 01:24 AM

So stark! I love it! Sometimes it's good to read something hard and keen and very present, even though it may be painful to the touch. You've really captured the feel of it, the charge in the air....

~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸ ¸¸ºº> ~~~(¸¸ER¸¸ºº>
______________Ratleader______________

Aenimal
Member Rara Avis

since 2002-11-18

Posts 7350
the ass-end of space

4 posted 2003-08-28 01:57 AM

your words squeeze soul

MARK V SHELDON
Member Elite

since 2001-06-21

Posts 3015
In a corporeal internship...

5 posted 2003-08-28 02:01 AM

Have a little

,on me.

-MVS

You CAN make a difference:
http://educate-yourself.org/

passing shadows
Member Empyrean

since 1999-08-26

Posts 45577
displaced

6 posted 2003-08-28 03:29 AM

yes, I know...

Kaoru

Member Elite

since 2003-06-07

Posts 3892
where the wild flowers grow

7 posted 2003-08-28 03:36 AM

I love this...

Susan Caldwell
Member Rara Avis

since 2002-12-27

Posts 8348
Florida

8 posted 2003-08-28 12:36 PM

This was excellent! (and needs a bump)

Susan

Professor Gloom
Member Elite

since 2000-07-23

Posts 3082
of Depression

9 posted 2003-08-28 01:00 PM

Just last night,
Midst the thunder and light display of a storm
I got poured upon, pelted with hail, and totally drenched,
An awesome display
Such is your poem in capturing emotion,
But not just of the storm

Gloom

LeeJ
Member Patricius

since 2003-06-19

Posts 13296

10 posted 2003-08-28 01:20 PM

we had an incredible storm here...turned into a tornado...thousands without electric...you know...all these strange and violent weather patterns make me wonder...
Good write

jellybeans
Member Elite

since 2000-10-13

Posts 2298

11 posted 2003-08-28 01:42 PM

wow, just incredible.....I would have never come up with this metaphor and you write it with such ease....how many of us have felt this sadness, have felt this despair...you pen it with grace...and I hope you also found the freshness that comes after the rain
incredible write...jb applauds!!

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