There was a lot of consternation last week at the zoo.
The Board was quite perplexed with no idea what to do!
The female ape went into heat and caused a real scene.
No male ape was interested 'cause she was way too mean.

The president said, "I know someone who may help us out.
His IQ is in single digits - he's a drunken lout.
The poor boy is so ugly that he's never had a date
And, for the right amount, perhaps Toerag will be her mate."

So they called Toerag in, explained their sorry situation
As Toerag looked at them with stare of stark incredulation.
"Make love to a female ape?!?! You boys think Toerag here is blind?"
"It's worth fivehundred bucks", they said - and Toerag changed his mind.

"I'll show her a real good time", Toe said. "That you can bet
But before I give my answer four conditions must be met.
First, I ain't gonna kiss her and she ain't allowed to lick.
Second, if a kid is born he must be raised a Catholic."

They all agreed that these small points were something they could do
And said, "That's fine with us, Toerag. What are the other two?"
Toe said, "Although it is a date, I ain't gonna wear a tux
And, fourth, it might take me some time to raise five hundred bucks!!!"

Thanks for enjoying, everyone! No, Maureen, we've never met....one day we will!

Actually, this happened a while back and Toerag came up with the money and later a child was born...




True to Toerag's wishes, it was raised Catholic

  ROFL ROFL ROFL  

Oh Michael ... I cracked up at the closing lines in this! You're one in a million my 'Deer, and that picture in your response just tops it off, lol.

Thanks for the grins!

Best wishes and hugs,
/Kit