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vlraynes
Member Rara Avis

since 2000-07-25

Posts 8229
Somewhere... out there...

0 posted 2003-07-20 08:17 PM

Perfidy

Come friend or foe
say which ye be
What role be yours
in destiny
Would that ye be
fair confidant
a trusted ear
in doubt for naught
Or dost ye come
in selfish quest
to plant the seeds
of hate...detest
If last be truth
I bid ye go
from earthly home
to fate below
Say friend or foe
answer ye now...

With traitor's kiss
he marked my brow

~vlraynes

"it is better to be a part of beauty for one instant and then cease
to exist than to exist forever and never be a part of beauty"
-- Don Marquis
[This message has been edited by vlraynes (07-21-2003 05:12 PM).]

Magia_negra
Member

since 2003-07-16

Posts 77
CA, USA

1 posted 2003-07-20 08:35 PM

Beautifully written, Vlraynes, i hear music in this piece.

...somos los locos para siempre
para siempre te amo
mi vida...

[This message has been edited by Magia_negra (07-20-2003 08:36 PM).]

Skyfire

Member Elite

since 2000-12-27

Posts 3381
Riding

2 posted 2003-07-21 01:44 AM

is it just me or is there more to this than it seems on the surface?

beautiful, and yet... *grin* I'm actually pondering

... Even though you're gone ...

peppermint35
Senior Member

since 2000-05-28

Posts 1106
Texas, USA

3 posted 2003-07-21 02:21 AM

This simply flowed

Pepper
"A poem is the very image of life expressed in its eternal truth."
Percy Bysshe Shelley

passing shadows
Member Empyrean

since 1999-08-26

Posts 45577
displaced

4 posted 2003-07-21 05:08 AM

dang! loved this! flowed so easliy off the tongue, and what an ending!

Nan

Administrator

Member Seraphic

since 1999-05-20

Posts 21191
Cape Cod Massachusetts USA

5 posted 2003-07-21 04:55 PM

Tis such a perfidious world we live in... Gotta pick your friends wisely, don'tcha??... Well said m'friend...

SharaRose
Member Elite

since 2003-07-19

Posts 2501
Somewhere out there~

6 posted 2003-07-21 05:07 PM

I loved this!!!!! It's as if done with an accent of people of days long ago, but in any language, any accent, it's always a deep need to know the truth about someones intentions toward you. I can very much relate to this...veryyy much so!!! I love this old english, like the Bible language.

SharaRose @-->--

Of sound, and speech let all lift the hearer!

Martie

Moderator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-09-21

Posts 28049
California

7 posted 2003-07-21 05:24 PM

Very well done, poetess Vicky! Love what you're doing with words lately.

ThisDiamond
Member Rara Avis

since 2002-02-22

Posts 9353
Michigan, USA

8 posted 2003-07-21 11:25 PM

Vicky,
This brought me to the courts of knights and jesters...excellent presentation.
The last line was perfect. TD

garysgirl

Member Laureate

since 2002-09-29

Posts 19237
Florida, USA

9 posted 2003-07-21 11:35 PM

Vicky, I think we think along this same lines.
There is such truth in this write. I like the
way you chose your words, too. It was perfect.

Hugs

Ethel

Earth Angel
Member Empyrean

since 2002-08-27

Posts 40215
Realms of Light

10 posted 2003-07-21 11:41 PM

Now what be the grist for thy poetic mill, dear Lady?

Brava bella!
EA

QjQ
Member Elite

since 2003-04-18

Posts 3756
U.S.A.

11 posted 2003-07-22 12:14 PM

very nice read,, enjoyed...

Kielo
Senior Member

since 2002-02-11

Posts 1109

12 posted 2003-07-22 03:08 AM

I really loved this.... I got very vivid imagery from this.... and pain.... and, of course, I like it very much.

Kielo

I'll never know the cost, but all of Him is more than enough for all of me....

Sunshine

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-25

Posts 63354
Listening to every heart

13 posted 2003-07-22 06:32 AM

You've crossed
several centuries
and brought aged
knowledge
to here, and now...

as Nan said

trust wisely.

dgvarner
Member Elite

since 2000-05-13

Posts 3552
High Springs, Florida

14 posted 2003-07-22 11:14 PM

wow...That was cool... different....but cool!

I like that!

hugs, g

I want to run naked in the Blue!

[This message has been edited by dgvarner (07-23-2003 08:42 AM).]

timothysangel1973

Senior Member

since 2001-12-03

Posts 1725
Never close enough

15 posted 2003-07-22 11:17 PM

"With traitor's kiss
he marked my brow"

Loved the ending here!

angelblueyes
Member Elite

since 2003-07-19

Posts 2148
Oklahoma

16 posted 2003-07-22 11:19 PM

I loved this.The flow was so smooth it was like a song.You are a true poetess.
angelblueyes

icebox
Member Elite

since 2003-05-03

Posts 4383
in the shadows

17 posted 2003-07-23 12:29 PM

This easily could be the opening lines of a saga.

Thanks for sharing it.

JaiOfHeaven
Member

since 2003-04-12

Posts 207
California, Usa

18 posted 2003-07-23 01:49 AM

It was tight vicky.
Liked it!!!
Too bad i'm so dumb I didn't know what it meant.

Love,
Jai

xoxoxoxoxoxo

littlewing
Member Rara Avis

since 2003-03-02

Posts 9655
New York

19 posted 2003-07-24 10:10 PM

Vicky,
Oh my, what a treasure I have found here
This is amazing!
Nice and tight
forewarning indeed
what insight you have indeed
xxoo

Jason Lyle
Senior Member

since 2003-02-07

Posts 1438
With my darkling

20 posted 2003-07-24 10:26 PM

Nice rhythm and flow.I loved this Vicky.

Jason

brian sites
Senior Member

since 2002-06-25

Posts 1475
usa

21 posted 2003-07-24 10:57 PM

hmmmm

a nice flowing
tapestry
of sting

hug

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