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Kaoru

Member Elite

since 2003-06-07

Posts 3892
where the wild flowers grow

0 posted 2003-07-15 08:24 PM

I breathe you in,
secretly.
Alluring blaze
deep in my veins.

Close up,
shoot through them
like a roller-coaster.
Be through my
body, and drink
of my sins.

Let's rewind,
you'll start
to feel dizzy
when we come to a complete stop
and begin again.

Touch my hand
for I am the wind, cooling
beads of sweat upon your
sleeping
forehead.

Understand my anger,
you played upon my pain like
violin.

Stop.
Rewind, begin again.
Thoughts melding as I
breathe you in.

QjQ
Member Elite

since 2003-04-18

Posts 3756
U.S.A.

1 posted 2003-07-15 08:30 PM

terrific read n write....

A voice of honesty
   is treasured
more than voices
   of flattery
      QjQ

JaiOfHeaven
Member

since 2003-04-12

Posts 207
California, Usa

2 posted 2003-07-16 01:53 AM

That was on a harlequin temptress level. Kinda made my heart sing for a moment. I appreciate the time you put in to write it. The feeling escaping me is sweet indeed. Beautiful...

passing shadows
Member Empyrean

since 1999-08-26

Posts 45577
displaced

3 posted 2003-07-16 02:09 AM

I like your style!

JamesMichael
Member Empyrean

since 1999-11-16

Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA

4 posted 2003-07-16 12:23 PM

I appreciated the part about the wind cooling sweat from the forehead...James

gemjop
Member Elite

since 2002-11-18

Posts 2587
Pencilveinia, USA

5 posted 2003-07-21 08:16 PM

walker
Member Elite

since 2001-02-11

Posts 2240
Florida

6 posted 2003-07-21 08:36 PM

Love this one.

scorpio
Member Ascendant

since 2002-10-02

Posts 5178
right...there

7 posted 2003-07-21 08:40 PM

An absorbing poem...well done..

believe in what your heart feels...

Miah
Senior Member

since 2002-08-26

Posts 1062
Pennsylvania

8 posted 2003-07-21 09:43 PM

I love how it flowed. A wonderful delight to read.

serenity blaze
Member Empyrean

since 2000-02-02

Posts 27738

9 posted 2003-07-21 09:48 PM

Beautiful.

(There's a delicious man who says that to me, so yes, that caught my attention.)

spingiddy serenity here.

Lovely, just lovely you.

Aenimal
Member Rara Avis

since 2002-11-18

Posts 7350
the ass-end of space

10 posted 2003-07-21 10:12 PM

l*ved this. great abstract style leaves this open to interpretation, i won't venture mine

vlraynes
Member Rara Avis

since 2000-07-25

Posts 8229
Somewhere... out there...

11 posted 2003-07-21 10:23 PM

Simply beautiful, Kaoru...love this.

*smiling at spingiddy serenity*
"My friends are my estate."
~Emily Dickinson

Earth Angel
Member Empyrean

since 2002-08-27

Posts 40215
Realms of Light

12 posted 2003-07-22 12:08 PM

Highly provocative and sensual...

Warm hugs,
EA

littlewing
Member Rara Avis

since 2003-03-02

Posts 9655
New York

13 posted 2003-07-22 02:34 AM

Meghan:

this is amazing writing . . .

Understand my anger,
you played upon my pain like
violin.

xxoo

Goldenrose
Member Elite

since 2003-05-30

Posts 3665

14 posted 2003-07-22 06:39 AM

Very good writing...thank you

Goldenrose.

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