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Cpat Hair

Member Patricius

since 2001-06-05

Posts 11793

0 posted 2003-06-12 12:03 PM

This stop we made
on the jeweled necklace of green
as the rains began
draws close to the days
we must move ahead
in dust and sun
across the uneven ripples
in return to that place
where our walls in thick cool
shade the day
and our bed lies next
to open window and garden
sweet with honeysuckle.

But today,
as the clouds grow weaker
and sun begins its raging desire
to again burn all it touches
we seek the clean of cloth
washed free of clinging sand
then aired along the dates
by constant western wind.

You knelt at edge of stream
in scrub of robes
while I strung rope
for rugs, until at noon
we stopped our tasks
and spread the cheese and figs
on the narrow green
so we might eat.

I fed you wine and watched
your cheeks flush as I tasted
the vintage from your lips.

When our repast was complete,
and there were only the robes we wore
to be cleaned
naked we washed them,
side by side,
then stepped ourselves
into the cool.

Afterwards
we found the shade of palm
as the white skin uncovered
in contrast with the brown arms
grew tender

I touched tender my love
and put my lips to
the oasis of you
that I might fill my soul
and you with love

this day in camp.

passing shadows
Member Empyrean

since 1999-08-26

Posts 45577
displaced

1 posted 2003-06-12 12:09 PM

I love all of your writing...

Janet Marie
Member Laureate

since 2000-01-22

Posts 18554

2 posted 2003-06-12 12:11 PM

OK....what past life has your muse tapped in to...this is like biblical imagery...I see Cleopatra sunning on the banks of the Nile.

and its NOT my raspberry tea...its YOUR poetry.

serenity blaze
Member Empyrean

since 2000-02-02

Posts 27738

3 posted 2003-06-12 12:13 PM

When you write this sweet, I just want to jump into the poem...

sigh.

You are another poet that is easy to love.

*battin' eyelashes*

(giggles g'morn...er, afternoon? what time is it? I SLEPT!!!)

Truly beautiful Cap. I loved the studies in contrast.

Sunshine

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-25

Posts 63354
Listening to every heart

4 posted 2003-06-12 12:14 PM

Y'know, our little Moth Queen is not far off the mark, now is she...

running circles around the rest....

there shall be a response in kind, from some of us, soon, I do so believe...I do, I do...

littlewing
Member Rara Avis

since 2003-03-02

Posts 9655
New York

5 posted 2003-06-12 12:16 PM

Goodness Ron

you do paint me a picture . . .
belongs in a gallery - it does
beautiful - just beautiful
xxoo

Dark Angel
Member Patricius

since 1999-08-04

Posts 10095

6 posted 2003-06-12 05:21 PM

The imagery is wondermous Ron, I was there watching every subtle movement.

Excellent writing as usual dear

Maree.

oh adding this to my library as well

gemjop
Member Elite

since 2002-11-18

Posts 2587
Pencilveinia, USA

7 posted 2003-06-12 05:31 PM

another beautiful scene relived, i'm with serenity, you do make us feel like jumping into these scenes you set, if we don feel like we're there already.

loving this stuff, you wonderful soulful man you!

Enchantress
Member Empyrean

since 2001-08-14

Posts 35113
Canada eh.

8 posted 2003-06-12 05:45 PM

Gee...I'd follow a man anywhere who wanted to taste the vintage from my lips...

I know...I know...go write, and read Rumi Nancy. LOL.
~Hugs~

Midnitesun

Member Empyrean

since 2001-05-18

Posts 28647
Gaia

9 posted 2003-06-12 06:03 PM

I'm ready to go camping now.
You had me at hello.
??? but I can't find where you actually said 'hello'

Ron, this piece reminds me of two places I've lived, Israel and Southern California, and left me tasting those dates, brushing sand from my lips as I read, sipping the wine of your words.

Martie

Moderator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-09-21

Posts 28049
California

10 posted 2003-06-12 06:24 PM

Ron...wonderful, again...and not any part of Southern California that I've been in...but I guess you have to be with the right person to get the right feeling....and then, be anywhere.

Aenimal
Member Rara Avis

since 2002-11-18

Posts 7350
the ass-end of space

11 posted 2003-06-12 09:32 PM

Incredible series of writing, you're a gifted storyteller my friend

Patricia
Member Elite

since 2003-04-06

Posts 2160
Missouri

12 posted 2003-06-12 09:53 PM

No tears this time...I am just drinking the beauty of this one.

Patricia

Magnus

Member Laureate

since 2001-10-10

Posts 14135
South Carolina, USA

13 posted 2003-06-12 10:02 PM

Break out the tent, pack the cooler....and
send the kids to Granny's house....

Well, it was a thought....

Like this one, yep I do...

garysgirl

Member Laureate

since 2002-09-29

Posts 19237
Florida, USA

14 posted 2003-06-12 10:09 PM

When our repast was complete,
and there were only the robes we wore
to be cleaned
naked we washed them,
side by side,
then stepped ourselves
into the cool.

Afterwards
we found the shade of palm
as the white skin uncovered
in contrast with the brown arms
grew tender

I touched tender my love
and put my lips to
the oasis of you
that I might fill my soul
and you with love

Well Capt. Ron...you know what I'm gonna say, don't ya? Yep, I do wish me and my Honey-Love were on this kind of camping trip right now...even in the rain.....Yep, I do!!

Hugs

Ethel

suthern

Member Seraphic

since 1999-07-29

Posts 20723
Louisiana

15 posted 2003-06-13 09:28 AM

I touched tender my love
and put my lips to
the oasis of you
that I might fill my soul
and you with love

You keep me sighing like this and some joker's gonna hand me a paper bag thinking I'm hyperventilating. *G*

Superb writing, Cap'n... and to think... my camping trip memories are of stinky feet! LOL

Earth Angel
Member Empyrean

since 2002-08-27

Posts 40215
Realms of Light

16 posted 2003-06-13 09:56 AM

Captain, such a day in pause is exactly what the Doctor of Love would prescribe for the emotional well-being of the human race!

Huggums,
EA

Duncan
Member Ascendant

since 2001-08-07

Posts 5455

17 posted 2003-06-14 10:52 PM

'I touched tender my love
and put my lips to
the oasis of you
that I might fill my soul
and you with love'

You do know how to build something up bud.
Moving on to see just how blue this flame burns...

Ceinwyn
Member Elite

since 2000-07-09

Posts 2175
VA

18 posted 2003-06-16 02:06 PM

breathtakingly gorgeous images you have me seeing over here...damn I want that

enjoyed *swoons*

If at first you don't succeed destroy all the evidence that you tried.

jellybeans
Member Elite

since 2000-10-13

Posts 2298

19 posted 2003-06-16 02:31 PM

ah, would that my memory possessed such jems to recall and write, but sadly it does not, and I do not have the imagination to create them...whichever this might be...tis beautiful

Aenimal
Member Rara Avis

since 2002-11-18

Posts 7350
the ass-end of space

20 posted 2003-06-16 03:07 PM

I fed you wine and watched
your cheeks flush as I tasted
the vintage from your lips.

always hard to single out a few but these just stood out and captured me..great write

dreambuilder
Member

since 2003-03-23

Posts 319
caddyshack

21 posted 2003-06-16 03:54 PM

Beautiful write - Stirred many memories & even more dreams - well written & very much enjoyed

Artic Wind
Member Rara Avis

since 2007-09-16

Posts 8080
Realm of Supernatural

22 posted 2008-02-06 05:41 PM

I enjoyed your Beautiful Write

Enjoyed the thoughts

ARCTIC WIND

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