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Open Poetry #26
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kaile
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since 2000-02-06
Posts 5146
singapore

0 posted 2003-05-20 12:20 PM


larry's challenge~~ /pip/Forum7/HTML/000552.html  


I scratch, scratch, scratch
til I draw blood
but my trimmed fingertips won't stop
they, programmed to do so,
like a delirious dog,
clawing, digging mad
towards my bone of grief
Only then can I
break through this exterior
and breathe

2 parties collide,
2 conflicting accounts
that I believe in
Pray, the answer isn't as simple as
whoever gets to place his feet
on the ground in a game of see-saw
No winners, only losers
So wipe that smirk off your faces,
guarded by indifference walls
designed to safeguard your vulnerability
but only block well-meaning facilitation

You won't listen to this one hand clapping

So I'm like a goldfish,
confused, aimless,
swimming in circles
in a bowl of noncommittal
Except that I also
scratch, scratch, scratch,
drawing blood but not yet healed

[This message has been edited by kaile (05-20-2003 12:42 PM).]

© Copyright 2003 heng kaile - All Rights Reserved
Sven
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since 1999-11-23
Posts 14937
East Lansing, MI USA
1 posted 2003-05-20 12:24 PM


wow. . .

you've really stretched with this one kaile. . .I love the line, "you won't listen to this one hand clapping". . . it's perfect. . .

great work here my friend. . .

------------------------------------------------------------------

To the world, you may only be one person. But to one person, you may be the world.

QjQ
Member Elite
since 2003-04-18
Posts 3756
U.S.A.
2 posted 2003-05-20 12:24 PM


*You won't listen to this one hand clapping

i liked the way you expressed this write

Poetry gives us relief, We give poetry reason.

Midnitesun
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since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647
Gaia
3 posted 2003-05-20 01:15 PM



a new one for my treasured goldfish bowl

peaceful scratching day to you


Larry C
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Member Patricius
since 2001-09-10
Posts 10286
United States
4 posted 2003-05-31 05:42 PM


kaile,
Thanks for the link!

====================
one hand clapping
====================
It says so much. A discomforting write...as it should be. Well done. I am proud of your work.

If tears could build a stairway and memories a lane, I'd walk right up to heaven and bring you home again.

spritrider87
Member
since 2003-05-31
Posts 294
NH
5 posted 2003-05-31 07:58 PM


i hope everything is ok. i found a hidden message in it even if you didnt mean it to be there. this is a very powerful pice. i loved how it was written. keep writing.   


passing shadows
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since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
6 posted 2003-06-01 02:36 AM


ouch
garysgirl
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since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237
Florida, USA
7 posted 2003-06-01 07:20 AM


You won't listen to this one hand clapping

Kaile, thank you for being a peacemaker instead of a troublemaker. That's what the whole world needs........everywhere.

Sometimes things should just be allowed to die. Especially when there seems to be no peaceable solution for all the parties concerned.

Thank you for this poem.  


wings of the moon
Member
since 2003-03-27
Posts 323
Pink bubblegum land
8 posted 2004-04-13 04:51 PM


pretty damn good, especially when you stop "telling" us and let the imagery do the work... good job...

"more than yesterday, less than tomorrow, i love you"

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