Another Gloomy Day (from DKPoetry3)

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nakdthoughts
Member Laureate

since 2000-10-29

Posts 19200
Between the Lines

0 posted 2003-02-15 12:40 PM

Another Gloomy Day

As I look out the window
and feel the loneliness closing in on me,
I watch as each drop lands upon the window ledge outside.
Through the bay windows, the splatterings
remind me of my life...seeping from the whole of me.
As each day continues whether I wish for it to or not,
the lack of you, your words, your insight (or is that incite)
pulls me under the gray.

Hope is there, hidden within the swirls of darkness,
watching me, every move I make,
and often those I don't. Fever has almost cleared
yet the heat of desires still rise at the oddest times,
keeping me from clear thinking, and thoughts often
run wild.

I see myself as if in a commercial
running through Spring's garden of fragrant blossoms,
sheerness of dress captured by the breeze
of my coursing, to your waiting arms.

I sigh at every grain of thought, every minute of the hour
glassed before me in wait, and as time runs out,
I keep into a "forever" hold, by turning you over
and over, knowing that time shall stand still, one day...

and wipe away this gray.

~Wynter

2001

"Love is not blind - It sees more and not less, but because it sees more, it is willing to see less."
(Will Moss)

[This message has been edited by nakdthoughts (02-15-2003 06:31 PM).]

Local Parasite

Member Elite

since 2001-11-05

Posts 2527
Transylconia, Winnipeg

1 posted 2003-02-15 01:35 PM

This is a really interesting piece of poetry. It's a very familiar concept, I've seen it written many times before, but still you show a lot of talent by being able to give it originality and uniqueness without changing the theme too much.

Very nice work.

Parasite

"Faith" means the will to avoid knowing what is true.
~ Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

garysgirl

Member Laureate

since 2002-09-29

Posts 19237
Florida, USA

2 posted 2003-02-15 04:02 PM

Maureen, even though this is sad, it's beautifully written, as only you can do...

"Love makes the world go around"
~~with love and hugs from Ethel~~

Mistletoe Angel

Member Empyrean

since 2000-12-17

Posts 32816
Portland, Oregon

3 posted 2003-02-15 04:38 PM

(big hugggsssssssss) Oh Maureen, this is so very heartfelt, sweet friend, this deeply touched my heart and I hope all is well as my heart sends angel hugs out to you! (sigh) This is touching, sweet friend, God Bless You, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Maureen, thank you for sharing!

May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

"Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..."

Shakira

nakdthoughts
Member Laureate

since 2000-10-29

Posts 19200
Between the Lines

4 posted 2003-02-15 04:43 PM

Thank you, each. This was an older poem from 2001..It just was one of my own favorites.

M

Titia Geertman
Member Ascendant

since 2001-05-07

Posts 5182
Netherlands

5 posted 2003-02-16 06:29 PM

I think it's one of my favorites too Maureen, thank you for reposting.

Titia

Like scattered leaves...my words will flow

Chanson
Senior Member

since 2000-08-19

Posts 1559
Up Creek w/Out Paddle

6 posted 2003-02-16 08:48 PM

I like the weather/emotion similarities
and how real they are.
Well expressed, M. *s

Kit McCallum

Administrator

Member Laureate

since 2000-04-30

Posts 14774
Ontario, Canada

7 posted 2003-02-18 06:54 AM

Beautifully descriptive, Maureen ... a lovely book submission choice.

Best wishes,
/Kit

Larry C

Member Patricius

since 2001-09-10

Posts 10286
United States

8 posted 2003-02-18 11:53 PM

M,
I'll always love your writing. You make so much from your past that offers so much to the rest of us. Bless you.

If tears could build a stairway and memories a lane, I'd walk right up to heaven and bring you home again.

suthern

Member Seraphic

since 1999-07-29

Posts 20723
Louisiana

9 posted 2003-02-19 02:11 PM

Since I rarely visit Dark, I'd missed this one... and it's excellent! *S*

Charisma

Member Ascendant

since 2000-09-30

Posts 5906
lost in blue pages

10 posted 2003-02-19 04:03 PM

me too missed almost this gem, excellent piece.

Charisma

Jason Lyle
Senior Member

since 2003-02-07

Posts 1438
With my darkling

11 posted 2003-02-20 05:37 AM

very nice write.
Jason

Earth Angel
Member Empyrean

since 2002-08-27

Posts 40215
Realms of Light

12 posted 2003-02-20 09:30 AM

Yes, 'tis gloomy, but somehow it is rather calming and peaceful. You have quite a knack at creating a mood...

Warm hugs,
EA

hoot_owl_rn
Member Patricius

since 1999-07-05

Posts 10750
Glen Hope, PA USA

13 posted 2003-02-20 09:32 AM

As they say, there's always a silver lining around every cloud and yes, better days ahead

catalinamoon

Member Rara Avis

since 2000-06-03

Posts 9543
The Shores of Alone

14 posted 2003-02-20 11:53 AM

As always Maureen, I see myself in your words. Well done.
Sandra

Sunshine

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-25

Posts 63354
Listening to every heart

15 posted 2003-02-20 11:58 AM

I keep into a "forever" hold,

~*~

gloom dissipates...

sooner or later....

reflective, indeed....

Moonlight Romeo

Senior Member

since 2001-09-10

Posts 982
The heart of you

16 posted 2003-02-20 12:09 PM

Yes, an excellent choice and a unique form. Both are given your own special voice.

Thank you.

What light through yon window breaks? It is the east, and Juliet is the sun.

Sudhir Iyer
Member Ascendant

since 2000-04-26

Posts 6943
Mumbai, India : now in Belgium

17 posted 2003-02-20 12:49 PM

An excellent choice indeed....

Such a nice work

Regards,
sudhir

Justbleu
Member Elite

since 1999-08-31

Posts 3329
Oregon, Originally From Alaska :)

18 posted 2003-02-21 08:32 AM

I know of this all too well....LOVED THIS!!!
Would be a nice addition to the book....

Bridgette

nakdthoughts
Member Laureate

since 2000-10-29

Posts 19200
Between the Lines

19 posted 2003-02-21 11:06 AM

I thank each of you for taking the time to stop and read. I appreciate the kindness. *s

M

[This message has been edited by nakdthoughts (02-21-2003 11:07 AM).]

aries_luv_ppl
Senior Member

since 2001-09-20

Posts 1448
Universal Mind

20 posted 2003-02-22 12:22 PM

this is nice.

~Every girl has a dream within.

serenity blaze
Member Empyrean

since 2000-02-02

Posts 27738

21 posted 2003-02-22 12:54 PM

ah...now you should know I KNOW this feeling.

(sorry it took me so long to get here, time is NOT my friend these days...)

enjoyed the read, m'friend.

kayjay
Member Elite

since 2002-06-24

Posts 2015
Oregon

22 posted 2003-02-22 01:29 AM

What IS there about the greyness of winter that brings loneliness out in us, and makes us shiver a little deeper. You bring this out so well. You get my vote. Ken

Through rubble and trouble and dark of night
The yawn of a dawn will hasten the light

Bill Charles
Member Patricius

since 2000-07-11

Posts 10619
highways, & byways, for now

23 posted 2003-02-22 01:31 AM

nakdthoughts - I finally caught up to you and your writing, my vote my dear...

BC

SEA

Moderator

Member Seraphic

since 2000-01-18

Posts 22676
with you

24 posted 2003-02-22 01:37 AM

love this one....relate....

Duncan
Member Ascendant

since 2001-08-07

Posts 5455

25 posted 2003-02-22 10:19 AM

'I see myself as if in a commercial
running through Spring's garden of fragrant blossoms,
sheerness of dress captured by the breeze
of my coursing, to your waiting arms.'

Whatever the commercial is for, I'll take two! I can see why this is one of your favorites.

Nan

Administrator

Member Seraphic

since 1999-05-20

Posts 21191
Cape Cod Massachusetts USA

26 posted 2003-02-26 07:37 AM

I think this is a reflective piece that we can all relate to....

Marge Tindal

Member Empyrean

since 1999-11-06

Posts 42384
Florida's Foreverly Shores

27 posted 2003-02-26 01:07 PM

WynterGal~

Count me in~

'I sigh at every grain of thought, every minute of the hour
glassed before me in wait, and as time runs out,
I keep into a "forever" hold, by turning you over
and over, knowing that time shall stand still, one day...'

I love these 'hour-glassed' thoughts, running through your head~
*Huglets*
~*Marge*~

~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
[email protected]

Enchantress
Member Empyrean

since 2001-08-14

Posts 35113
Canada eh.

28 posted 2003-02-26 03:12 PM

Well done Maureen...much enjoyed!

~ Trace my body with your words..
And in doing so, you touch my heart. ~

bsquirrel

Member Rara Avis

since 2000-01-03

Posts 7855

29 posted 2003-02-26 05:27 PM

Post another? This one is good, but I've seen great from you, Maureen. You can tell by some of my replies.

Munda
Member Elite

since 1999-10-08

Posts 3544
The Hague, The Netherlands

30 posted 2003-02-26 05:32 PM

Gloomy and beautiful.

nakdthoughts
Member Laureate

since 2000-10-29

Posts 19200
Between the Lines

31 posted 2003-03-01 02:53 PM

thank you for your responses and Mike. I chose this poem not for it being one of my best (although I wouldn't be a good judge of that) but because it has meaning to me

thanks
M

Marsha

Member Rara Avis

since 2000-07-10

Posts 7423
Maidstone Kent England

32 posted 2003-03-03 08:07 PM

Little Mo dearest one this is as always truly exquisite writing and so atmospheric, I swear I know this feeling darling heart, you write it so very well.

I love this one darling heart, it is as smooth as silk which slips over my mind like a cloak of wonder. Truly you are excellent and I love it utterly

If this isn’t included it will be a travesty

Love and warm stuff
As always
Mushy

Tomorrow is another day I don't know what it holds
but I can face the future with courage brave and bold

Footprints In My Heart
Kethry

Kethry
Member Rara Avis

since 2000-07-29

Posts 9082
Victoria Australia

33 posted 2003-03-07 03:12 PM

This is still one of my favourites from you.
Keth

Here in the midst of my lonely abyss, a single joy I find...your presence in my mind. Unknown

nakdthoughts
Member Laureate

since 2000-10-29

Posts 19200
Between the Lines

34 posted 2003-03-14 11:09 AM

Hugs Marsha and Kethry. Thank you for reading and responding. I am not on as much right now, so I apologize for being so late in thanking you.
M

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