Reflections on the Web |
Conversation Not Meant For Me (edited and repost from prose) |
1slick_lady Member Ascendant
since 2000-12-22
Posts 6088standing on a shadow's lace |
Obligations take us places we normally wouldn’t go, and doing things we do not want to do. But there we are, doing the right thing, if we want to or not. I found myself sitting in the waiting area of a hospital surgery room with enough paper and pens to write two books and enough on my mind to fill an ocean. And so it began the wait from hell. Blood, lust and tears flew from my pen with amazing vigor and I looked at the sheets wondering who had written the words. Time has no concept in places like this, and neither do the people sitting at the front desk. As teary eyed companions sit on the edges of seats with needles of their own flexing taunt muscles in chairs handed down from prisons that had voted out electric chairs years before. Here I was, glued to my own chair as others played musical chairs to telephones checking in at homes- where others waited. An older couple shuffling into the room abruptly disrupted my near perfect writing silence. He was a tall man in what looked to be in his eighties. His hair was longer than I expected of his age, past the back of his collar, neatly combed and the most beautiful white I had ever seen. When I saw him I thought to myself…Moses? Not out of disrespect but he was what my mind had said Moses looked like. The woman with him had the same illuminating glow to her hair. She was small in comparison to his size and I smiled thinking of my own size almost the same petite. Is this I, at seventy or eighty? He in his mannerly way took her to the desk to check in for her surgery. She signed and promised to pay what was most likely the last of the money they had in the world. I tried to distract myself with the best friends I ever had, words. But the couple must have been hard of hearing for they talked a little above the crowd and echoed in every corner of the room. It was not annoying; I just didn’t want to hear their business, for it was none of mine. They grew louder, the room grew quieter. At the desk, they were Elizabeth and Ralph Green. He was eighty-four and she was eighty-two and a half, Ralph laughed at the half and winked at his bride. He said they had been married for sixty-one years. Sixty-one years? I said sixty-one years in my mind for about sixty one times and it floored me. Ralph brought Elizabeth to the same row of seats I was in, two seats down and over facing me. Ralph left Elizabeth and went back to the desk to hand over personal information and insurance cards. He scurried back quickly as not to leave her alone too long. I looked up and smiled and saw Elizabeth was crying, so I quickly went back to my writing, looking as busy as I could not to impose. Ralph took her hand in his and held it so tenderly and sweet. Elizabeth sobbed a little louder and I had to cross my legs the other way just to move body language away from them. She said, “Honey, lets go home.” He leaned in closely to her, looked her straight in the eye, “Now Liz, we have been all through this. We made this decision together, just as most of our decisions. You know if you do not do this, you will be gone soon.” “Ralph, I’m afraid. You know Dr. Butler said the surgery is a big life risk too, at my age, I have changed my mind,” she sobbed. Ralph reached for the woman he loved, pulled her in the cleft of his arm and kissed her cheek. He ran his fingers through her hair like she was his prized child. He told her everything would be all right. This was the best hospital in the state and Dr. Butler was the best doctor in the nation. They talked of their past. She complained she must look a fright with her hair down and no rouge or powder on and no lipstick. He told her she was still the most beautiful woman he had ever seen. He must have told her sixty one thousand times how much he loved her and how wonderful his life was with her in it. He was sorry for all he had ever done to disappoint her or to hurt her. He told her she was all he ever needed. He spoke of all the joy they had shared and how rich he was for having her. I saw her face turn from fear to contentment. Glowingly, his love, shined straight through her. The tears flowed from me like a dam bursting in a New Orleans rainstorm as I sat listening to this lifetime love story. They didn’t notice, I was no part of their conversation. As he kissed her frail lips, her name was called and he walked with her till they told him he could go no further. He told them, “Take care of her please.” “I will be here waiting for you, Liz, when you get done” kissing her tender lips. Ralph came back and sat in the same exact seat as before but this time he was about seven inches shorter, hunched over and crying. He had not shed one tear in front of her being her sheer strength, but now he was drenched in his own salt. Mumbling quietly. I couldn’t hear anything he was saying. Then suddenly I heard him. He said, “God.” “ Please God, do not take her. Do not take her from me! For if you do I will surely perish.” I felt this incredible heat pass through me and I had to get out of there as fast as I could. I rushed to gather my things, my emotions were taking over and all I could see was red. I had to get as far away from this as I could. Ralph and I stood at the same time; he headed out one door, I out the other. I was running from that room like a deer white tailed to greenery. I almost slipped on the linoleum in my heeled sandals running out of that room trying to get into the Florida sun to bring some breath back into my lungs. But when I reached the sun my tear stained face burnt me like cinders. I sat there on that bench alone forever it seemed. Crying paralyzed in my thoughts and in prayers. I cried for them. I cried for Elizabeth and Ralph and wondered silently. And I cried for me too, for I wanted to be loved like that. © Copyright 2003 Helen Chambers - All Rights Reserved |
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winston Member
since 2002-12-19
Posts 204NW of Eden |
Intense characters converging from a divergent and disparate life. Well depicted. There's a typo, you've got 'parish' instead of 'perish'. Thanks. It's amazing I won. I was running against peace, prosperity, & incumbency. |
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1slick_lady Member Ascendant
since 2000-12-22
Posts 6088standing on a shadow's lace |
ty got it |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Yes! Another "Ron, add the Kleenex to the copies forwarded" post.... Such a wonderful addition to Reflections... |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
Wow. This is powerful... and it's pure excellence! |
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winston Member
since 2002-12-19
Posts 204NW of Eden |
You are welcome. It's amazing I won. I was running against peace, prosperity, & incumbency. |
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vandana
since 1999-10-22
Posts 10463USA |
enjoyed |
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Mistletoe Angel
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816Portland, Oregon |
(big hugggssssssss) Oh Helen, this is so heartaching but beautiful, sweet friend, this is wonderful and I feel this could easily become quite a poem too though I love it in this prose form, yay, this is excellent, I send angel hugs and my vote your way, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Helen, thank you for sharing! May love and light always shine upon you! Love, Noah Eaton "Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..." |
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Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612Hurricane Alley |
This is so touching, I'm glad you submitted it. |
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jbouder Member Elite
since 1999-09-18
Posts 2534Whole Sort Of Genl Mish Mash |
So ... did she make it?!? Come on ... did she???? Very nicely done. You've got my vote, but I HATE endings like that. Jim |
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Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
YES!!! Fantastic! A must for the book Helen! ~Hugs~ ~ Trace my body with your words.. |
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Larry C
since 2001-09-10
Posts 10286United States |
Helen, Who doesn't? This needs to be in the book. Not much prose floating around and this is such excellent writing. I love it. If tears could build a stairway and memories a lane, I'd walk right up to heaven and bring you home again. [This message has been edited by Larry C (02-20-2003 07:28 PM).] |
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Mysteria
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328British Columbia, Canada |
You certainly have my vote of confidence on this piece, well done indeed! |
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Chanson Senior Member
since 2000-08-19
Posts 1559Up Creek w/Out Paddle |
Sixty-one years.. there is hope for all of us. s When you think you have heard it all, |
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kaile
since 2000-02-06
Posts 5146singapore |
I had to cross my legs the other way just to move body language away from them. Helen, what a great line here! i dig the story and add my vote, hoping that this will be included... "I want to be loved like that too" a good expression of our most fundamental need |
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DawnG
since 2000-06-23
Posts 1494United States |
A delightful post. Great submission Dawn |
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Joyce Johnson
since 2001-03-10
Posts 9912Washington State |
Intense. Joyce |
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Bill Charles Member Patricius
since 2000-07-11
Posts 10619highways, & byways, for now |
helen - somewhat different from you that I've read, my vote for this... BC |
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wranx Member Elite
since 2002-06-07
Posts 3689Moved from a shack to a barn |
A very good submition. And hey! it's about 61,000 words longer than your usual work. hehe. A vote for prose. Ed |
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GG Member Elite
since 2002-12-03
Posts 3532Lost in thought |
oh my... wow.. this is good. this stings. This burns and joys and wonders and... wow.. I really don't know what else to say. WOW! Always, Alyssa - And so it was that time stood still - |
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garysgirl
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237Florida, USA |
Helen, I'm so sorry that I've missed this before. This is so beautiful. It reminded me so much of how my parents are. i really hope that this gets into the book. It's beautiful... "Love makes the world go around" |
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SPIRIT Senior Member
since 2002-12-29
Posts 1745California Desert |
Beautiful writing - I happily cast my vote through the tears. Enormously visual and touching. |
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Spiros Zafiris Senior Member
since 2002-10-20
Posts 982Canada |
..1slick_lady../\..yes, very good; enjoyed much; gets my vote.. ../\..Spiros ----------------trees--------- |
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majnu
since 2002-10-13
Posts 1088SF Bay Area |
i loved it when i first read it in prose and i would love to see it in the book. -majnu |
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Skyfire
since 2000-12-27
Posts 3381Riding |
WOW... you definitely have my vote! I'm speechless Sometimes you find a friend where once there wasn't one. Sometimes you find a love where once there was a friend. |
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Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191Cape Cod Massachusetts USA |
You've a multi-talented quill, h... |
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Susan Caldwell Member Rara Avis
since 2002-12-27
Posts 8348Florida |
Astonishingly beautiful message. Susan |
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Larry C
since 2001-09-10
Posts 10286United States |
A bump for an awesome write. If tears could build a stairway and memories a lane, I'd walk right up to heaven and bring you home again. |
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regards2you Member Elite
since 2002-10-01
Posts 3940California |
Helen, So many wonderful poetic lines in this, hard to pick my favorite, but I found this touching, considering their age: "Like she was his prized child" Very talented, you are. Enjoyed greatly. This is very special and has my vote. Hugs, Pat ..without surrender, be on good terms with all persons.. |
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Larry C
since 2001-09-10
Posts 10286United States |
I'm not letting this keeper slip away. I love this piece... If tears could build a stairway and memories a lane, I'd walk right up to heaven and bring you home again. |
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BluesSerenade Member Patricius
since 2001-10-23
Posts 10549By the Seaside |
Made me cry too, for I could almost see you sitting there writing as fast as your pen would take you, absorbed in the conversation...not meant for you? I don't know about that! This is a lovely profile of your heart in prose and in poetry. and yes, to be loved like that!! |
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Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648 |
*tears* Fabulous piece of writing! Definitely one for the book! |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
I loved it then, and love it now. And? seems this time YOU cast the spell, and I'll just cast the vote! |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
Bookworthy without a doubt! |
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Midnitesun
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647Gaia |
In a soft whisper, yes. Such a rare love story. |
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Muys Member
since 2002-04-06
Posts 389The Netherlands |
You have my vote Muys |
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nakdthoughts Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200Between the Lines |
I have lived a story like that..it just ended before its time... M |
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Suetang Member Ascendant
since 2001-03-07
Posts 5187Melbourne, Australia |
Hello Helen A wonderful yet sad story which had me mesmerised from beginning to end. Take care.....Sue I am in motion |
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Larry C
since 2001-09-10
Posts 10286United States |
You can't go away yet... If tears could build a stairway and memories a lane, I'd walk right up to heaven and bring you home again. |
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1slick_lady Member Ascendant
since 2000-12-22
Posts 6088standing on a shadow's lace |
larry...you are cracking me up but......i do adore you...h |
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Larry C
since 2001-09-10
Posts 10286United States |
helen, You know, for you the moon. But frankly this is so awesome. Can you tell I like chick flicks? Book me...I'm a romantic! If tears could build a stairway and memories a lane, I'd walk right up to heaven and bring you home again. |
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1slick_lady Member Ascendant
since 2000-12-22
Posts 6088standing on a shadow's lace |
cuffed and on your knees...now for your punishment...LOL ...helen |
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SEA
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676with you |
I am at a loss for words here. This is the best I've read of you, ever. |
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Larry C
since 2001-09-10
Posts 10286United States |
Cool! One more round! If tears could build a stairway and memories a lane, I'd walk right up to heaven and bring you home again. |
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Amature2 Member
since 2001-01-08
Posts 416 |
1slick_lady, you had me glued from start to finish. You have my vote. |
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Midnitesun
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647Gaia |
OK, so now go sign your publishing agreement so this one can make it into the book too! your fan club wants you in the book |
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aaron woodside Member
since 2001-09-26
Posts 256 |
I would have cried for me too. Very nice. I hope it gets in. ex animo, Aaron IN NOMINE PATRI ET FILII ET SPIRITUS SANCTI |
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Larry C
since 2001-09-10
Posts 10286United States |
Kacy, Stop teasing...Ron has to accept this first! If tears could build a stairway and memories a lane, I'd walk right up to heaven and bring you home again. |
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Bill Charles Member Patricius
since 2000-07-11
Posts 10619highways, & byways, for now |
helen - never seen you write like this before, it's an amazing writing... Voted for this... BC |
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kaile
since 2000-02-06
Posts 5146singapore |
helen, i would love to see this one in the book but this won't even be considered unless you sign the Publisher's Agreement for your other poem A Lady's Lace first...was wondering whether you got the email from Ron? |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Helen! If you haven't signed your first agreement, all the bumping and voting won't help! Hope you see this soon! |
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1slick_lady Member Ascendant
since 2000-12-22
Posts 6088standing on a shadow's lace |
sorry all done now....... |
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Mysteria
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328British Columbia, Canada |
Helen, I had to read this again, and hopefully others will read it as well, excellent work!
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Kellie_Cantrell Senior Member
since 2002-05-22
Posts 1667New York |
This is very good! My vote is in! (¨`·.·´¨) (¨`·.·´¨) |
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Larry C
since 2001-09-10
Posts 10286United States |
It ain't over yet! |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Helen...So heart touching...tears here. |
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Larry C
since 2001-09-10
Posts 10286United States |
BUMP |
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QjQ Member Elite
since 2003-04-18
Posts 3756U.S.A. |
a very well written and attention holding write. vote! |
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Aenimal Member Rara Avis
since 2002-11-18
Posts 7350the ass-end of space |
Me too..amazing write H. |
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