Walls of 248 West Harrison

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Cpat Hair

Member Patricius

since 2001-06-05

Posts 11793

0 posted 2003-01-30 12:38 PM

I sighed between
sheets of crisp wrinkles
put there when you
slid me into them
toying with a wisp strayed,
afraid,
seeing no further than eyelashes
for fear the morning
might another reflection
shadow,
much less sure.

tremble me,
in soft stroked touch of face
as lip traced parts this yield
of sob

Soon shadow

Soon

Sighs resign
To caress of slumber
And shades of dream
Smeared on this canvas
Of alone
But a pointillist
rendering
Of one

serenity blaze
Member Empyrean

since 2000-02-02

Posts 27738

1 posted 2003-01-30 12:56 PM

These musings of yours are so intimate--I often feel like guilty as though I were peeking through a keyhole to your mind...

relected shadows indeed.

regards2you
Member Elite

since 2002-10-01

Posts 3940
California

2 posted 2003-01-30 12:57 PM

As Martie said in another of your poems, you are on a roll.

This is deeply heart touching. As perfectly well written as the others.

Enjoying your writing greatly.

Pat

..without surrender, be on good terms with all persons..
"Desiderata"

Cpat Hair

Member Patricius

since 2001-06-05

Posts 11793

3 posted 2003-01-30 12:59 PM

Ser... if they seem intimate then perhaps I have done well...for many are just musings on how it would feel to be thinking this or that... how it would fee to expereince this or that... a keyhole into my mind.( laughing) not sure one needs a key to unlock my mind it is pretty simple.. good to see you back...and hope all is as well with you as you can expect..

Cpat Hair

Member Patricius

since 2001-06-05

Posts 11793

4 posted 2003-01-30 01:00 PM

Thank you Pat... my last for a while, just a series of thoughts and ideas this morning one actualy paying off the other in a loose association of thoughts. I appreciate your reading and taking time to comment.

Sunshine

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-25

Posts 63354
Listening to every heart

5 posted 2003-01-30 01:53 PM

Cpat, your "loose associations" seem pretty
tight and tied to me...
I think I once wrote a poem using the
word pointillist...I think I'll have
to go look it up...

BTW...

Enchantress
Member Empyrean

since 2001-08-14

Posts 35113
Canada eh.

6 posted 2003-01-30 01:53 PM

You're so damn good!
I feel as though I have been eavesdropping.
No No!! Not your last..not even for awhile!
*Nancy's carried off kicking and screaming
but managing to blow kisses in your general direction*

Martie

Moderator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-09-21

Posts 28049
California

7 posted 2003-01-30 02:00 PM

Ron

"tremble me,
in soft stroked touch of face
as lip traced parts this yield
of sob

Soon shadow"

It is not easy to write a feeling...you have done it well.

Janet Marie
Member Laureate

since 2000-01-22

Posts 18554

8 posted 2003-01-30 02:08 PM

tremble me,
in soft stroked touch of face
as lip traced parts this yield
of sob

Soon shadow

Soon

Sighs resign
To caress of slumber
And shades of dream
Smeared on this canvas
Of alone
But a pointillist
rendering
Of one
======================

Once again me thinks me needs new sheets LOL
and btw..in the town where I grew up...there was a North and South Harrison.
Means nothing to this poem... lol...just came to mind ...
ok..the moth is rambling..time to hush
See the effect your poetry has on me

If made to choose between the power of writing a poem
or the ecstasy of a poem unwritten I would choose ecstasy
In the end it is better poetry
KG

[This message has been edited by Janet Marie (01-30-2003 02:09 PM).]

1slick_lady
Member Ascendant

since 2000-12-22

Posts 6088
standing on a shadow's lace

9 posted 2003-01-30 03:24 PM

"I sighed between
sheets of crisp wrinkles
put there when you
slid me into them"

loved the whole poem but these lines are my fav...helen

Tari Miriel
Member

since 2003-01-28

Posts 69
The state of mind

10 posted 2003-01-30 05:21 PM

I was thinking this poem is
subtly provocative but I think
"provocative subtlety" is a better
description. Slight difference
but it's there.

I likes.

jellybeans
Member Elite

since 2000-10-13

Posts 2298

11 posted 2003-01-31 02:02 PM

very nice, and I agree with ser, it is as if one is privy to private thoughts and images...wonderful work as always

Mistletoe Angel

Member Empyrean

since 2000-12-17

Posts 32816
Portland, Oregon

12 posted 2003-01-31 02:06 PM

(smiles) Oh my gosh, I love this, sweet friend, this is a fresco of a poem, I love it, maybe you can consider the City Council to use that wall to paint a murale in memory of such a blessing, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Ron, thank you for sharing!

May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

"Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..."

Shakira

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