Open Poetry #24 |
Trying To, But |
Amature2 Member
since 2001-01-08
Posts 416 |
Trying To, But Trying to cover up the scars But the wound still shows Trying to show a smile But the tears still flow Trying to hold on But loosing the grip Trying to be strong But the weakness over powers Trying to, But |
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Jaime
Registered
MemberPosts 250 |
I suppose there's always a 'but'... Just be careful that it's not a crutch. It has a nice flow to it and I like the ending because it seems at times that the opposition is endless and tireless. You worded this simply with, "Trying to, But". Nicely done. - Jaime Shiva went on break now look at how much it's gonna take to make this place a space where we can breathe. [This message has been edited by Jaime (01-28-2003 11:19 PM).] |
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BluesSerenade Member Patricius
since 2001-10-23
Posts 10549By the Seaside |
Been there done that, keep trying, and before you know it, it will just seem like a bad dream. No buts... Be well~ |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
trying is good, failing is worse, not trying again is unacceptable |
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