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Open Poetry #24
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VAS
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-11-16
Posts 7450
Oregon

0 posted 2003-01-28 10:51 AM



the morning slips in
beneath the clouds
whispering its solitude
in a quietness
that evokes
peace

©January 28, 2003
tell me what you think of this idea, "I almost stopped with the first 2 lines

Whether on the shoal or on the shore,
I'll seek the lighthouse evermore.

© Copyright 2003 Virginia Salter - All Rights Reserved
Eromyna
Member
since 2002-11-29
Posts 306
Pheonix, AZ, USA
1 posted 2003-01-28 11:09 AM


I never thought of peace before as something you could evoke. *ponders*

"I don't need to scream for you to deem me aggravation."

Ratleader
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Rara Avis
since 2003-01-23
Posts 7026
Visiting Earth on a Guest Pass
2 posted 2003-01-28 11:57 AM


The word "peace" has many definitions. I once wrote (in a newsletter article of all places!):

"There is that which I call peace in lying here, the pine needles sharp but soft, feeling but not comprehending the height of these trees under a haze blue Yosemite sky..."

This poem is about that kind of peace, which indeed can be evoked. And this poem does evoke it. Thanks for the gift, VAS.

If I were stopping early, I'd include line three in the brew. If....


~~(¸¸¸¸ºº>   ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº>  ~~(¸¸ ¸¸ºº>    ~~~(¸¸ER¸¸ºº>

garysgirl
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Laureate
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237
Florida, USA
3 posted 2003-01-28 12:13 PM


Virginia, I love this...the thought as well as your choice of words and the style..

"Love makes the world go around"
~~with love and hugs from Ethel~~  
                  

Charisma
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Ascendant
since 2000-09-30
Posts 5906
lost in blue pages
4 posted 2003-01-28 12:50 PM


beautiful written!

Charisma

passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
5 posted 2003-01-28 01:17 PM


beautiful imagery...good as it is!
regards2you
Member Elite
since 2002-10-01
Posts 3940
California
6 posted 2003-01-28 01:41 PM




I love this. The morning whispering solitude is right! ( and peace) Short and oh so perfect! This is a ~makes you feel good~,little poem.  Enjoyed!

Hugs, Pat

..without surrender, be on good terms with all persons..
        "Desiderata"

inkedgoddess
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-11-19
Posts 7392
Ohio
7 posted 2003-01-28 04:56 PM


just before the day starts,
the peace before, how nice of you to pay it
this respect

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