Open Poetry #24 |
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Three Poems Prefaced By Keats |
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RSWells Member Elite
since 2001-06-17
Posts 2533![]() |
"Then off at once, as in a wanton freak;" -Keats 1817 The Killer (terza rima) Gaunt and lank, so odd with features angled what sole was globus, pale and dead gray eyes, progeny less lust than leer once mangled an arrows birth between uncaring thighs. His lobeless ears so like his tossel cap tucked and shrivelled as though to minimize witness descriptions to another rap should fingers point to his sharp unsheathed face and once again the law his shoulders tap. Unclean hair which oozed like dark shoelaces, choaked throat which seemed half swallowed hammer's head, rawboned chin, a lowered drawbridge places a jumping off point for hope so long dead, where once it may have crossed the whisp'ring lips but now's the last voice some had heard, it's dread keenly felt when in this shadow's eclipse whose focused visage thrust as starvling knives, shods the cloven hooves as devil's wingtips he walks among us just to take some lives. Found'rous cheeks whose vales grow seasoned stubble, his long nose aimed toward hell as he contrives to raze all earthly temples down to rubble. . . . "He was a poet, sure a lover too" -Keats 1817 The Lover (sonnet) Perhaps his first words made it all too plain so quick to seed what seemed her fertile loam, his poet's need to bleed the lover's poem before the reader's ear had been obtained, in hindsight he of course wished he'd refrained for lonely is the heart that's forced to roam, lonelier still's love without a home and he not one to stay and face the pain. Her lightness seemed to beg a pedestal, his love profound none of it he'd ration this scale of love's imbalances were cruel the ember of his ardor turned ashen in words denying air and hope it's fuel she confessed another her grand passion. . . . "Ah! Surely he had burst our mortal bars" -Keats 1817 The Exile (villanelle) To stay sane freedom's definition shrinks in liberty the stalwart mind prevails the strongest armor always has it's chinks The abyss at incarceration's brink is where one cuts the anchor, sets the sail, to stay sane freedom's definition shrinks A body chained it's brain yet free to think emancipated though it's cast in jail the strongest armor always has it's chinks Abused, a child or woman in a blink can soar beyond oppression's betrayal to stay sane freedom's definition shrinks The despots violent water we won't drink tyranny's suit's a sieve of rusting mail the strongest armor always has it's chinks The spirit flies, the body only sinks, enriched in mind, a soul will never fail, to stay sane freedom's definition shrinks the strongest armor always has it's chinks [This message has been edited by RSWells (01-09-2003 08:34 AM).] |
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© Copyright 2003 Richard S. Wells jr. - All Rights Reserved | |||
Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
Unclean hair which oozed like dark shoelace, choaked throat which seemed half swallowed hammer's head, rawboned chin, lowered drawbridge place, a jumping off point for hope so long dead, where once it may have crossed the whisp'ring lips but now's the last voice some had heard, it's dread felt when in this shadow's eclipse whose focused visage thrust as starvling knives, shods the cloven hooves as devil's wingtips ====================================== his poet's need to bleed the lover's poem before the reader's ear had been obtained, in hindsight he of course wished he'd refrained for lonely is the heart that's forced to roam, lonelier still's love without a home and he not one to stay and face the pain. Her lightness seemed to beg a pedestal, his love profound none of it he'd ration this scale of love's imbalances were cruel the ember of his ardor turned ashen =================================== Abused, a child or woman in a blink can soar beyond oppression's betrayal to stay sane freedom's definition shrinks The despots violent water we won't drink tyranny's suit's a sieve of rusting mail the strongest armor always has it's chinks The spirit flies, the body only sinks, enriched in mind, a soul will never fail, to stay sane freedom's definition shrinks the strongest armor always has it's chinks =================================== you take poetry to a higher level... I know English Majors and college proffessors that cant write at this level of scholarly intelligence. Very impressive poetic collage here poet sir..you take us to school and its oh so cool ![]() Moths dont care if the flame is real |
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Professor Gloom Member Elite
since 2000-07-23
Posts 3082of Depression |
Very enjoyable read, Although in the Terza Rima, typically there is no single last line, But only tercets throughout and all lengths are equal. Minor deviations from the form and take nothing from the quality Of the writing. Found the sonnet form an interesting variation of the ‘normal’ rhyme pattern And adds to it’s enjoyment to read. And the Villanelle is just marvelous. An excellent presentation of three poems That would stand well on their own. Packaged for combined pleasure. Gloom |
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RSWells Member Elite
since 2001-06-17
Posts 2533 |
Thank you J M. Prof, thanks for pointing out my errors. Henceforth I'll have my coffee before I post. I did miss a word or two in the terza rima which though doubtless isn't iambic is now corrected with 10 beats per line (the last an exception of 11). However the ending of this form seems to be one of interpretation. First I looked online since I'm sitting here and found some Shelley which ends with couplets of the same rhyme. Confused, I went to my original source, Princeton Encyclopedia of Poetry And Poetics, edited by Alex Preminger and I quote "Terza Rima. A verse form composed of iambic tercets rhyming aba bcb, etc., the second line of the first tercet supplying the rhyme for the second tercet, the second line of the second tercet supplying the rhyme for the third, and so on, thus giving an effect of linkage to the entire composition. In t. r., the conclusion of a formal unit is generally signified by the occurrence of a single line which completes the rhyme structure by rhyming with the middle line of the preceding tercet, thus xyx y.." [This message has been edited by RSWells (01-09-2003 08:53 AM).] |
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Sandpiper Senior Member
since 2002-06-15
Posts 738land of flora and fauna |
you serve a delicious poetic buffet Mr. Wells--excellent!! "And it was at that age...Poetry arrived in search of me...And something started in my soul." |
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inkedgoddess Member Rara Avis
since 2002-11-19
Posts 7392Ohio |
does this come with cliffnotes? |
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Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191Cape Cod Massachusetts USA |
You KNOW I loved every minute of this read... A sucker I am for such fine-tuned work... I'm just a die-hard RSWells fan, I guess.. ![]() |
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Gentle Spirit Member Patricius
since 2000-10-09
Posts 13989 |
"in hindsight he of course wished he'd refrained for lonely is the heart that's forced to roam, lonelier still's love without a home and he not one to stay and face the pain." and this is pure R.S.Wells........ what a gift you share...... I'm hooked.... ![]() |
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Cpat Hair![]()
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
you know..I read you and wonder why I bother to even try to write. ![]() impressive..and entertaining. Always know there is a treasure when I open one of yur posts...always know I am in for a lesson in style and class... Enjoyed this... as usual |
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garysgirl![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237Florida, USA |
Since I am "in awe", again, I amen everything that Capt. Ron said. Actually he can say it much better than I can, anyway........ ![]() ![]() ![]() "Love makes the world go around" ~~with love and hugs from Ethel~~ [This message has been edited by garysgirl (01-10-2003 01:06 PM).] |
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garysgirl![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237Florida, USA |
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GOlDsparklESS Member
since 2001-12-13
Posts 428central nj |
hey~ i agree with Janet Marie! i have been confounded. |
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angelfriend Member
since 2003-01-11
Posts 52Michigan USA |
Thanks for the lessons and wonderful poems. I agree that they were masterful and inspire me to keep trying my hand at a sonnet. Someday! "The only gift is a portion of thyself" - Ralph Waldo Emerson |
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Mysteria![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328British Columbia, Canada |
Richard - you awesome thing you! ![]() ~ The soul lies buried in ink that does not flow ~ |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Move over Nan... while all three were excellent, I have to say, the sonnet did me in. |
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